Downhill Fast Co~Activity

Who I am is a  combination of who I used to be and who I am becoming and the here and now of me is sometimes caught in the middle.  When I was kid, my moms number one priority was to ensure my safety, cleanliness, and satiety.  Mission accomplished, I still live, breathe, eat, drink but...oh you knew there was a but coming, you could feel it, right?  My mothers fear of loss kept me physically safe, in the playpen safe, and for the majority of my adult life,  I stepped out of the playpen in the gym, doing tricks, cool creative things with equipment, strength moves that looked fancy and required balance and skill~things my mother would shutter at, they would scare her.  I know that I know that if I had been left to my own devices, I would have been an adrenalin kid, one of those crazy tree, rock climbing, jumping from high places maniacs.  I know this because each time I step into what charges me up, the overwhelming joy captures me and I experience pure glee.  I remember laughing so hard when I first galloped on a horse, or went down a fast hill on a toboggan, that I couldn't  breathe, the activity took my breathe away from sheer exhilaration. I know that when I was a kid, I was in my head a lot, and now I know why.  That was the only safe place for me and while I became quite the philosophical kid, I was missing out on the holy connection between being and doing.  In coaching, this is Co~Activity. The being and the doing. Its great to think about doing something, but without actually moving forward, taking action, the thought is a passive thing that may someday die for lack of DOING.  Soon, I will go kayaking with new friends...with a laugh that belied my serious message, I told my mom that she is NOT ALLOWED to be scared for me. This was for her, not for me...I love her and don't want her to worry, I am going and coming back.