It Is Good

Two dogs live in my house. They act a lot like dogs. Complexity isn't a word I would use to describe a dog. While most dogs exhibit their own personality traits and tendencies, there is one thing all dogs appear to have in common. When a dog hears good dog or bad dog, they react. Ears and tails perk and wag to the words good boy, good girl. Ears and tails drop and tuck when they hear bad boy, bad girl. The last thing a dog wants to do is disappoint. A healthy dog, one that has been loved and considered, treated like a family member, has these normal and predictable behaviours. Alternatively, a dog that has been ignored, randomly or inappropriately disciplined can become defensive, self protective and ready to either cower or attack, depending on the level of maltreatment. I am not a dog expert. You may very well be a pro with poodles and other canines, I am strictly speaking from observation. What is my point, you ask? When dogs are told they are good, something happens to them. They soak in the wonderment. They look back with adoring melty eyes. It is one of the many reasons dog appreciators find them so endearing and irresistible. 

I must switch tracks Dear Reader, because while I enjoy two furries as household pets, it is the man/boy that I love more than life itself. I see how my son responses when he gets the idea that he is good. I do not mean this in the derogatory sense, the demeaning and often manipulative uses of the terms good and bad. I mean it in the I believe in you and what you are capable of way that only humans can convey, one human to another. I see him lift his head in wonder, eyes searching for confidence in mine when I speak encouragement to him. I see him straighten into the possibilities and I sense him believing too, that he is capable of much. We have influence on our children, on each other and lastly, on ourselves. This may seem strange to you to know that if you are calling yourself bad, not good enough or worse than these in your head, it makes your face fall, your soul sag and your heart hurt. If you are rating yourself based on performance and it translates into insecurity, it is inevitable that you will do the very same thing, perhaps to those you love the most. Your internal atmosphere becomes external weather and the cure, Dear One, is to learn love. Learn love for yourself first, so that you can give it freely to others. Let us restore our relationships with our families learning what love looks and sounds like so that this generation becomes the one that does "it right" for the next that follows. Look into my eyes Dear One, I believe you are capable of much, and it is good.