Affirmative

Affirmative is defined in several ways: 1. agreeing with or consenting to a statement or request 2. stating that a fact is so; making an assertion. Today, I want to agree with and consent to statements and requests made, asserting that they are facts. I live in a half and half world Dear Reader. My body functions on the plane of earth and at times, it feels as though my soul is tethered with a satin rope loosely tied to my right ankle, keeping me from flying heavenward. What about you Dear One, do you have similar experiences? Is there more for you than meets the earthly eye? Back to the affirmative assertions mentioned earlier. Long ago, I was asked to believe. Most recently, in fact moments ago, I was asked, Do you believe? Do you believe that I AM? Do you believe what I have promised? Do you believe that what I say is what is and will be? Do you? My answer is a weak and tentative yes. I want to consent, make the assertion, YES, affirmative. But alas, my ankle, it is tethered, keeping me floating just above earth. My faith is tested in my waiting. I still cling to what I know, what I see. The pull upward and the gravitational pull downward have me in-between what I know and what I hope for. Hebrews 11:1 "Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen." I cannot see my spirit. I cannot see God. I can see the difficulties in front of me, the "things" that would have me convinced that hope is foolish. The "things" that would have me assert, this is beyond me and it is useless to even bother trying to change any of it. True, very true. Many things are beyond me and that, is the point Dear Reader. I cannot be everywhere all at once, solving this and fixing that. God, however, He is completely and all together different from me, from you. It is not I that I question, I know my limitations. It is God that I have doubted and questioned...can He really do what He has promised? Isn't this where we land sometimes as human beings, wondering when God, when will You act?

Seeing God is a matter of believing. I cannot see Him when I am trying to be Him. It is only when I affirm Him as my God that I am clear and my ankle slips free from the loose satiny loop that encircles it. Faith is my assurance of things hoped for, my conviction of things not seen. He, is all at once, everywhere all of the time...

Doorways & Passover

Safety

I have a house with five doorway entry points. Each door has some form of locking mechanism. The idea is to secure safety. Intruders may still be able to get in, but the locks pose as a slight deterrent and challenge. Each time a door is unlocked or opened, the possibility of unwanted entry by a stranger presents itself. 

Are we paranoid to have locks on our doors and windows dear reader? Is there a constant fear that we will be violated, and that other humans are not to be trusted? Perhaps, or is it ancient wisdom passed down long ago...

Obey
Gods people were captives, living as slaves in Egypt. He heard their cries for freedom, as they called out to Him for help. No one could anticipate the how of their deliverance. Their hope was in Him, and the plan unfolded before their watching eyes and listening ears. The part they were asked to play was this, obey:

Speak ye unto all the congregation of Israel, saying in the tenth day of this month the shall take to them every man a lamb, according to the house of their fathers, a lamb fo an house (Exodus 12:3) 

... and ye shall keep it up until the fourteenth day of the same month: and the whole assembly of the congregation of Israel shall kill it in the evening. And they shall take of the blood, and strike it on the two side posts and on the upper door post of the houses, wherein they shall eat it (Exodus 12:6-7)

For I will pass through the land of Egypt this night, and will smite all the firstborn in the land of Egypt, both man and beast; and against all the
gods of Egypt I will execute judgment: I am the LORD. And the blood shall be to you for a token upon the houses where ye are: and when I see the blood, I will pass over you, and the plague shall not be upon you to destroy you, when I smite the land of Egypt. And this day shall be unto you for a memorial; and ye shall keep it a feast to the LORD throughout your generations; ye shall keep it a feast by an ordinance for ever (Exodus 12:12-14) 

Fast forward

Fast forward to 2017. The foreshadowing in Exodus is a delight dear reader. It is a puzzle piece placed by God for us to recall as we look toward Easter and the placement of the final piece. The Lamb of God who takes away the sins of the world, is Jesus on the cross. 

He shed His blood so that we can figuratively strike it on the two side posts and on the upper door post of the houses. God sees the blood, but more importantly, we must obey, trusting in Him, so that He will pass over us, without judgement that ultimately results in death. 

I don't know about you, but I want this kind of protection. While I want to keep destructive intruders out of my household, I am keen on inviting Jesus in! The Ancient of days bestowed wisdom to His people in the past, and ordained a continuance to commemorate a release from captivity celebration for generations to come...that's us, He is speaking about us! 

All believers living, and all those who came after the life, death and resurrection of Christ are the ones that God is referencing as throughout your generations; ye shall keep it a feast by an ordinance for ever. I am thrilled, because we were in Gods redemptive plans all along. 

Now, about your doorways...

January 4th, 2022

Addendum: Back in 2017, I spent much time pondering Exodus, and how it pertained to my personal life. I realized as time went on, that the theme continued, and lo, we find ourselves in a similar situation to the ancient Hebrews. 

We must, we simply must, heed Biblical commands: it is our only hope for release, as modern day captives to an evil and hell bent global government, It isn't humans in charge, it is the devil... a modern day Pharaoh is represented in the henchman like humans that do his bidding

Read Exodus, read the entire Bible... the ending is already written, and the enemy is already conquered. We, must, trust, in the LORD for our now, and our future, into eternity and beyond

The Bell Tolls

Alarm bells

Alarm bells have been going off in my head, and in my heart... 

For whom the bell tolls

Can you hear the bells still?

Last night, a family member set an alarm on a phone. This morning, the sound of repeated bell ringing in intervals, reminded me of a poem by John Donne, 

For Whom the Bell Tolls. 

Rather than getting up and turning the alarm off immediately, I let the bells chime. recalling my youth, and the ringing of church bells, calling people to attendance. The powerful bells could be heard near and far, beckoning the faithful to worship and prayer. 

Bells set to clocks chime the hour, 12 rings for 12 o'clock, 1 for 1 o'clock, you get the idea. Bells declare it is time and somehow in their deep ringing, there is resonance in the bodies of men. We hear them and sometimes pay no attention. When we hear them and notice, the questions follow:

• What time is it for me? 
• Is the bell, tolling for me? 
• What am I to pay attention to? 
• Is there something to notice, to be aware of, to discern? 
• Is it time? 
• Time for what? 
• Am I to be alarmed, or am I being called? 

The snooze option

Wake up, wake up and listen, says the bells. Interestingly, man has his ways of circumventing the call of the bells. Snooze buttons have been installed, and for the sleepy, those who would rather stay in slumber, the snooze option is used often. We have our ways, don't we dear reader, to hear and ignore, to notice and dismiss, to be called and to lay down and just go back to sleep.

The bell, it tolls for you

• How are you with getting older? 
• When you look in the mirror, do you see changes, to your face, your body?
• Where are your wrinkle lines and how did they get there? 
• Are you living the life you have been called to? 
• Does it show, landmarked, on your face? 
• Is time slipping away into one more day, and another, just one more day? 
• Have all the bells that call you to Him stopped ringing? 
• Can you hear them still, dimly, as they ring from a tucked under your pillow place? 
• Can you hear them Dear Reader? 

The bell, it tolls for you: it tolls for me. It does not say it is too late, because while there is yet breath in your lungs, and thoughts in your head, it never is dear one, to hear and heed the last call.

It is time, now... listen for the bells, they call and beckon. They ring for you. 

Vacation Destination, Denial

You never have to be accountable on Denial

There is a cool place that many have gone to visit called Denial. I believe we have all gone on short excursions there and for some, it is so pleasant and wonderful, there is no coming back! In Denial, you can come and go as you please. You never have to be accountable and best of all, you can leave a trail of destruction behind you without cleaning up. No backward glances required, you can just keep on keeping on as you travel to happy destinations located nearby.

STAY AT YOUR OWN RISK

Close to Denial is an island called It's Not My Fault. Many people visit there, finding most excellent company. On It's Not My Fault, people tell their stories in great detail. There is a lot of nodding and agreement from everyone as they take turns listening and talking: after all, it isn't their fault either. You can take a short ferry ride across a bay to Blame Everyone Else. This is a delight to experience, however, there are signs posted everywhere by an anonymous do-gooder that clearly warn STAY AT YOUR OWN RISK. Eventually you will be blamed for something. 

Next on the island hopping tour is Deception. This place is very curious. Nothing is as it appears and this island is inhabited with indigenous characters. While visiting, you are bound to be enchanted by Bold Face Lie, Lie of Omission, Little White Lie, Manipulation, and a crowd favourite, Whispering Gossip. These entertainers will not fail to keep you engaged and occupied during your stay. You might even leave with a keepsake, you know, the old knife in your back kind that may very well be the envy of all of your friends when you return to Denial. Hell, you could win the grand title at the One Up Contest when you share your stories! Ahhh, sweet denial, it is a haven for the unaccountable, those who feel safest just not having to be responsible! Of course, denial is always an option, a go to hide away from the rest of the world but alas, it is lonely because relationship cannot survive there. No one can be trusted on Denial.

Beams of light widen eyes, pupils dilate

There is a place, not far from Denial. It boasts a lighthouse and on the darkest nights, beams of radiant light shine onto the inhabitants of Denial. Some cover their eyes with their forearms, blocking out the rays but some stare directly at the light and wonder about it, where it comes from. Eyes widen, pupils dilate. Those with eyes that see are drawn to travel to the island with the beams of light. The island of Truth beckons and onlookers cannot help but feel its tug, its inexplicable pull.

Denial is always an option and the Truth, well, it too is an option. You get to choose. We all get to choose. 

Spiritual Inheritance

Who do you resemble in your family? Can people tell who your siblings and parents are by looking at you? Have you heard someone say, are you related to so and so because you look just like them! Same gene pool equals similarities amongst relatives. It only makes sense Dear Reader. How about mannerisms? I was visiting with a friend and her son recently and I had to laugh as I pointed out to them that as they were listening to me, they were both leaning to the right, heads cocked, one leg crossed over the other. The son may have unconsciously picked up physical cues for listening from his mother with mannerisms to match or maybe, there is some kind of genetic coding from their gene pool that says, sit this way when intensely listening? I am going to go the safe route here and say that there are clearly some learned behaviours AND some natural family type predispositions. Now, what about who you are as a human being Dear One? Look at your spiritual inheritance now, take a close look. Perhaps you have been compared to your benevolent, honest hard working grandfather. Perhaps your aunt on your mothers side was mischievous, pulling playful pranks remembered and spoken of at family reunions decades later, long after death. Are you like her, compared to her Dear One? How about this. Your fathers brother was greedy, a liar, a cheat. He could not be trusted because his promises were schemes. Grin, no one compares you to him...there is no way you are like that guy! Its your sister that people compare to sneaky uncle so and so. Some traits seem like just that, family traits, passed on from one generation to the next. In the comparison, I wonder about the sins of a father being visited upon his children. What sins am I thinking of Dear Reader? It is this-godlessness. Without God, we open our doors wide to many a thing, including the lies of self dependency, motivation to succeed at the expense of relationships and a clinging to all that this life has to offer at the expense of losing our souls, selling them for things that rust and die away in fads that come and go. Was, is, your family godless? Have you inherited richly or were you born impoverished? What is your spiritual inheritance? Now, you are here, reading this. Your family has influenced you and currently, you are at choice. What was does not have to continue to be. Again, you can choose. Godlessness is easy, we are born into this and you can carry on as though you just didn't know you had options if you like. I am suggesting something else, Dear One. You can inherit from God directly, become heir apparent before the throne, grafted into His family through Christ. It is an offering, to shed the old and embrace the new. A forever family of saints united by God Almighty through His Son. I want in, how about you? 

God Gets the Job Done

I am laughing at the concept of God getting the God done. An image of Mrs. Doubtfire popped into my mind. The character in this movie became truth and kindness disguised as a nanny for a broken family in need. At the root of the message is a supplanting of self for the benefit and sake of others. This means that we deny our own needs, desires, wants, demands for acknowledgement and approval by putting others first. This can only happen when we ourselves are whole and healthy, Dear Reader. In other words, if our needs, desires and wants have not been met, we may very well be demanding them from the people we encounter, in strange and wanton ways. This is known as projection, defined as: the unconscious transfer of one's desires or emotions to another person. If projection is happening in the life of a would be helper, it may render him/her haphazard and perhaps even useless at times, in the service of other(s). God getting the job done is interesting because He has made a request of us, that we trust in Him by accepting His Son as the propitiation (this means winning or regaining Gods favour because it pleases Him to know that we have accepted His Son as Saviour) for our sins. In so doing, we, meaning the driver in me and the driver in you to self satisfy, is replaced by something far more valuable and worthy of our attention. The Holy Spirit! Forgive me if this seems an oversimplification but it is the only way for this simple Christ follower to explain. God gets the job done when I get out of the way and ask Him to use me well. When I give myself over to Him and say I trust you have the best, coolest, most heart racing wonderful plan, suddenly I am living it! I am fearlessly living it now Dear Reader. By keeping my eyes on Him, my ears open to The Spirit and modelling Christ in the world, I get to serve you, my husband, my son, family, friends, neighbours, the hungry the poor the downtrodden the the the...it isn't work, it is delight. My burden is light because God does all the heavy lifting, I just move a pebble or two! Matthew 11:28-30 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Jesus asks us to come to him with our weariness, our burdens. He wants to lighten the load for us Dear One. No human could possibly offer this because they cannot even guarantee it for themselves. It is Christ alone, God Himself that can make such bold promises. Go to Him first for your own help and soon enough, you will be rendered able to help another. 

Success Formula

How do you measure success? Your answer to this question may change after reading this and my hope is that individually and collectively, we have a meeting of the mind(s) with God on this topic of success. I have been immersed in a book entitled The Bondage Breaker, by Neil T. Anderson. Utilizing biblical wisdom, the author leads readers to truth. I borrow heavily from this book as I write. Here we go Dear Reader.

There are three W's that we can recall as our guideposts for success. They are the worship, word, and will of God. By worshipping God, we go into His word, seeking His will for the wisdom to live wisely. Keeping our eyes on God and what He wants for us is crucial for this success formula to work. Philippians 4:4-7 "Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."  Lets face it Dear One, our own self administered advice isn't always the most beneficial. Why not give ourselves a break and give God the reins, once and for all? With God in charge, we move to a most wonder filled piece of Biblical advice in Corinthians 10:5 "We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ." How do we do this Dear One? What thought(s) and how do we hold them captive, making them obedient to Christ? Here are the clues, the ones we can measure our thoughts against, found in Philippians 4:8-9 Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent and praiseworthy-think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me-put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you." We are promised peace Dear One, by holding every thought captive to the obedience of Christ. We are promised peace, Dear One, by measuring each thought and asking ourselves the questions, is it true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, praiseworthy? What does Jesus have to say about the thoughts that enter our minds AND that attempt to persuade us to action? What does Love want us to say, want us to do? The battle of the mind is fought and won in the spiritual arenas Dear Reader. The will and Word of God is our protection against onslaught, attack and destruction of our souls. There is a success formula available and only a portion is mentioned here. I point you now to this Philippians 4:13 "I can do everything through him who strengthens me." You can, do all things, through Christ, who strengthens you Dear One. Go to Him, ask Him for help and the answers to the questions and success will be yours. 

Vestige

Vestige is defined as: a trace or remnant of something that is disappearing or no longer exists. I have a remnant of fear that is disappearing and soon enough, will no longer exists. This is a bold statement Dear Reader and I am willing to explore it with you, here and now. The vestige of fear that lingers stems from a lie that was told to me when I was very young, whispered into my ear by an unsavoury shadowy thing. The lie was presented as a question so that doubt could be planted and grown in my heart, in my spirit. Perhaps you have been told this lie too, Dear One? What was the lie in the form of a question, you ask? It is this...Are you sure you can trust God? Other lies followed over the years and today, I came up against the largest one that has ever been whispered in my ear in an attempt to penetrate my mind-You cannot trust the will of God, look what HE asked HIS OWN SON to do. What if He asks the same of YOU or worse yet, the ones you love? Isn't that a little too much? When I look at the lies inside of the questions, I see that they are distractors and detractors from Truth. God asked a lot of His son and His son willingly submitted to the will of His Father but more than this, He depended on Him! In so doing, Jesus Christ defeated DEATH. Please forgive the many capitalized words in this piece of writing Dear Reader-I don't mean to be screaming at you! I am thrilled to share with you that the greatest lie of all is that this life, the one you and I are currently living, is the be all and end all. Jesus lived, was crucified, died and was buried in a tomb and on the third day, the power of God Almighty rose Jesus from the dead. Jesus didn't have to do all of this, He came from Heaven and is and was King already. He did all of this for us so that we might know and believe that we too, are not captive to death when we believe and trust in Him. Our attachment to creature comforts has us clinging fearfully to what we know, what we can see and touch. There is a never enough feeling to this because we must perpetually work to maintained the materials that sustain us. Not so with the will of God Almighty. He wants so much more for us than our mere existence Dear One. He cares about our souls! Jesus was tempted, tried and tested. So are we. The one thing that He demonstrated over and over again for us is the greatest gift safe guarding us from fear and insecurity. Deuteronomy 8:3 "Man does not live by bread alone, but man lives by everything that proceeds out of the mouth of the Lord." This was Jesus' answer to the liar, the doubt and fear planter, the one that whispers into vulnerable young and old ears. From this day forward, I am trusting and asking for Gods will in my life and the lives of those I love. What about you Dear Reader? Are you ready for this last vestige of fear to be vanquished? Ask Him for help if you are afraid, He is by your side ready to set your mind and heart free, In Christ. 

Catch Up

I see the smile on his face broaden

I have this image of Jesus. He is in a half turn, head slightly tilted downward, right robed arm reaching back, hand beckoning. He has a sweet smile on his face and his eyes welcome. Wordlessly He invites, come, follow me. He is ahead of me on the path and I want to catch up. He is waiting for me, frozen in place, giving me time to close the gap at my own pace. He could come back and get me but that would be too easy for both of us. He knows I must travel to Him on my own, perhaps trip over pebbles unseen, stumble and fall when my foot catches on a tuft of unruly grass. We both know I have to want this. I want to catch up and walk with him. He patiently waits. I see the smile on his face broaden. He knows, it is just a matter of time. I am gaining on him and he delights in my pursuit. My pace quickens. I have been praying, requesting, learning, growing, trusting, and faithfully following. His ways are The Way and I am led in silent encouragement.

Impatience is laden with expectations

Follow the Good Shepard

Years ago I asked for the gift of patience dear reader. Recently, I asked to learn about love. The request to be a love expert taught me that without patience, love is nearly impossible to demonstrate in relationship. I can say with confidence that impatience was a character flaw in me. I was impatient with myself and with others. Impatience is laden with expectations and unspoken desired outcomes. It can be pushy and harsh, acting as a repellant to personal, professional, emotional and spiritual growth. When I asked to learn how God loves, he started to deliver in the most astounding ways. The painful self discoveries have me freeing myself from patterns imprinted and picked up along the way that run counter to the love that God has for each of us. He nudges me here, points over there, directing my attention to see what he sees. And he waits for me to catch up!

Now lets look at you dear one. What is your request? What do you want to ask him for? He is waiting on the path just ahead of you, turning toward you, beckoning come follow me. Take a step keeping your eyes on him. Another one now, and another, and another...

Complacency

Off the hook feeling

I looked up the definition of complacency and was rather surprised-you might be too dear reader. It means: a feeling of smug or uncritical satisfaction with oneself or one's achievements. Interesting. I thought it meant to just relax and let whatever happens happen in a sluggish lazy way. To comply with non activity and allow what is to continue. Have you been complacent as defined by the dictionary?

With or without my active input changes are rapid, results extreme

Upon reading the definition I have a new appreciation for how complacency has played out in my life. I can see how easy it can be to tell myself that I have done my part, done all I can do for now and feel a sense of satisfaction that I can rest and perhaps not only rest, but really relax and get comfy. It is an off the hook I have punched the time clock feeling that my work is done for the day and I can pick up again tomorrow where I left off. Life doesn't work this way. What I have learned is that with or without my active input, changes are rapid and results can be extreme. A person or people along with situations can become almost unrecognizable while I lay resting, sleeping. It is stupor dear one, the slumber that steals us away from alive diligence-a lie that says good job, now off you go to play.

You must get up!

"How long will you lie there, you sluggard? When will you get up from your sleep?" (Proverbs 6:9).

I like the fact that God in his wisdom gave our bodies a clock. Day becomes night and our bodies prepare for rest-metabolic rate slows and blood pressure drops. As the skies darken, eye lids droop and close, sleep is imminent. Without sleep, illness and death are real threats. In our beds we are immobile, despite dreams that suggest we are flying, working or running through streets and fields. It is in sleep that we are truly off the hook. Not responsible for our time, duty less as it were.

Our time card is already punched

With the rising of the sun, we are called to awaken, come alive in a conscious and active way. Our time starts when our eyes open. Our time card is already punched and we are on the clock. Our time is sold, bought and paid for with blood, the blood of Christ.

"We want each of you to show this same diligence to the very end, in order to make your hope sure. We do not want you to become lazy, but to imitate those who through faith and patience inherit what has been promised" (Hebrews 6:11-12).

I want my inheritance. I want to imitate the faithful and patient ones who have gone before me, setting perfect examples. What about you? How has complacency tipped the scale in favour of failure in your life? And now this: are you willing to be awakened and diligently working as one of his own? Consider this ominous statement: Your time has already started and the clock is running. Time waits for no one dear reader. Whatever will you do?

My Job

Here is a quote from the late great evangelist, Billy Graham, Jr. "It is the Holy Spirits job to convict, Gods job to judge, and my job to love." These guiding light words come from a man who marinated in The Word of God until it soaked into his soul. Think of this Dear Reader. You are seeking employment. While scanning the many websites that post job descriptions, you come across one that says: Wanted. Service minded individual with experience in the human and spiritual realms. Must be kind, patient, faithful. Must believe in others to the point of questioning ones sanity. Ph.d in Love required. Masters in Compassion a must; undergrad degree in the arts of humility and heartache appreciated. Joy of the Spirit must be evident despite horrors heard of, experienced and seen all around the world. Will consider applicants based on their ability to love.

Imagine it, Dear One, what would your life look like if your job is to love? What would it take for you to get to the point where you were qualified? Can you now be trusted to fit the bill and do it justice? Billy Graham was very clear about what his role was, where he fit into the grand scheme of things. In one simple sentence, he stated his purpose as a human who lives amongst other humans. My job (is) to love. What is your job, Dear Reader? Have you figured this out yet? You are here being asked this question and if you haven't answered it yet, might I suggest that whatever the answer, you include love in the description? We are only of worth, feel value, when we contribute to one another's lives. We were created by Love and somehow seem to walk or run away from it often by the things we think and say about each other through conviction and judgement. I confess, I am not qualified for the job described above...yet. I am dedicated to attainment of the credentials. I am attending the University of Love, studying The Word of God. I am developing my skills as a human with a soul that belongs to my Saviour. One day soon, I will receive my Masters in compassion. Until then, I will keep my eye on the prize, a Doctorate in Love. What about you Dear One, what are you working toward? There is always room for one more in the study halls of Love, if you care to join us? 

The Ride

I am at the fair. I dislike the fair. Some of the rides are particularly disturbing. I stand in front of a ride that resembles an octopus, with outstretched bent in the middle tentacle arms. Carts for passengers cling to the appendages. It is frightening. How can this be entertaining as a ride? The thought of purposefully getting into one of the little open topped carts makes me cringe. Oddly and against my will, I find myself strapped into one of the cart seats. I feel horror rising from the pit of my belly and spreading throughout my being as I fail in my attempt to unlatch the belt buckle. The arm beneath me begins to move, slowly at first. In seconds, the arm is undulating, waving up then down while the other extended tentacles move in alternating fashion. One up, one down, one up, one down. The spinning round and round up and down accelerates and terror has me gripping the sides of the cart, my finger nails digging into the cheap imitation leather. At this speed, I fear that I will be thrown from the flying through the air cart. I hear my panicked voice screaming stop, please stop. The screaming becomes shrill as the tentacles wave wildly, STOP STOP STOP. I look for the one controlling the panel with the on/off switches, the dial for speed. In the spinning, I catch glimpses. He is there in the control booth, leaning. His muscled arms are folded across his chest. In a split second, we make eye contact. With a wicked half grin, he winks. I know then that he won't stop the ride. He likes the panic, the fear-he feeds it until there is frenzy. The centrifugal force of the spin has me moving away from what I know is true. In a moment of spinning calm, I recognize that he would have me believe that he is in control of the panel, that he is in control of the speed and the spin. He wants me to believe that I have no say. He wants me to feel trapped in a little open topped cart attached to a tentacle arm flying through space. My terror is his sick pleasure.

"I don't believe him, he is a liar." As I say this the arm begins to lose speed and the ups and downs become gentle, almost soothing. I look and see a glare of disgust on his face. He has been shoved far and away from the panel by an unseen hand. There is hatred in his eyes. I see determination mixed with some form of resignation. This isn't his first failed attempt to petrify and putrefy. The tentacle like arm stops. Shaken, I step out of the little cart that kept me safe. It did not eject me or hurl me into space. In clinging to it, I managed to survive. I exit the ride area, feeling solid ground beneath my feet. With every trembling step forward, I am grateful. With every confident step forward, I walk away from horror toward Truth. God, and only God, is in control. Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope."

Bare Bum Spanking

I listened to a message today on compromise from one of my favourite preachers, James MacDonald. Have you ever found yourself in a place you ought not to be in doing things with people you shouldn't be with and wondered to yourself, how the heck did this happen? Look closely and perhaps you will see, compromise can take some of the credit for your now situation. You can listen to this message yourself by going onto your browser and typing in: Recently Preached | Walk in the Word, James MacDonald Bible Teaching.

One of the things pointed to in the message about compromise is the current state of affairs you and I might find ourselves in. You may be in the thick of family, financial, physical, spiritual and or emotional challenges, sorting through and looking for the essence of what actually did happen to bring you to this place of confusion and pain. I see in my wayward ways that I took my eyes off of The Word of God. I was complacent and when I could have should have been deep in prayer, I chose other things of a mindless empty nature. I compromised much and in so doing, I set myself up for a bare bum spanking from God. If and when you listen to James' message, you will hear him say that Christians never admit to Gods disciplining them. I tell you here and now that He disciplines me often and that I have no shame in stating this: bare bum spankings from God are not a rarity in my life. I welcome them so that I can wake up to what is important, good, wonderful and true...He wants me awake to what is ugly, cruel, apathetic and useless too, so that I can see Him through contrast and by comparison. Hebrew 12:5-6"My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, nor faint when you are reproved by Him, for those whom the Lord loves He disciplines, and He scourges every son whom He receives." We must be disciplined in order to become disciples Dear One. If God is your number one, your Big Daddy, Abba Father, than it behooves you to accept Him and His corrections, regardless of how painful they may be. Today, I hope for the sting of correction in your life so that you can course correct. May His will be done in your life and the lives of those you love. 

Family By Default

Family is what we call two parental units plus child(ren). This used to be referred to as the nuclear family. Some parents stay with each other and their offspring while others split off, forming another family cell. The children are often members of family by default. Think on this a moment Dear Reader. Children have no choices, no say, no recourse. Children are what every adult hates to be, subjected to the whims and wants of others. Your heart and mind might have you reeling back in the film of your history, recalling a time when you were subject to your own parents or someone acting in their stead. What did you want desperately that you did not have the words to express? What did your tear filled eyes beg for that no one noticed or worse yet, someone told you to stop crying and be a big boy, be a big girl? Hurt happens Dear Reader, and sometimes a parents greatest efforts are not enough to prevent hurt because while the child is young, learning and growing, often times parents are too. Generational hurts are a lot like decrepit antiques passed down from one generation to the next-worthless and worn, they serve no purpose, no use. What was is still, as long as the old keeps moving in with the new. Allow me to be clear, here and now. You and I, we are in a position to be in family, not by default but by choice. If you are reading this and your family has "history" that reads like a horror story, then isn't it about time you do something differently? Are there patterns in place that you inherited, traditions that trade love for hate? Are there outdated antique ways that have never been looked at and asked the question, why are we keeping this thing? Elementally speaking, if love is the nucleus in a family, than love can lead the way to choice. If default has been the mode, what would selection look and feel like? Each member of family deserves consideration. This generation, and this means you and I, can make a difference and redefine what family means to us. Default is the unconscious acceptance of what was. Choice says there are ways, we have our ways and if family is valued, you WILL find a way to make them a choice. Reset your clock, spring forward and let Love lead the way. 

Race Cars

Have you ever fancied yourself to be a race car driver? There is a long stretch of road that I have travelled thousands of times. In my youth, I expertly wove in and out of traffic, anticipating which lane would be the fastest. Heart and engine racing, I edged my way into spaces between cars, looking for the next spot up ahead to slip quickly and smoothly into. Checking the time, I gauged my speedy success based on my last personal best. I enjoyed the split second decisions, the thrill of the speed and the adrenaline of the dangerous game I was playing. Close calls gave me moments of pause when I would wonder, is this a good idea? Maybe the stakes are a little too high? I stopped "playing" the game many years ago and when I see another imaginary race car driver on the same road, I hear myself say, I remember when...

I have a race car driver mind. I used to believe that I was clever, that if I thought fast enough, spoke soon enough, I could weave in and out of the minds of others, finding the fast lane to solutions. With quick words that followed on the heels of quick mental calculations, I was a powerful energy moving machine. Just like cutting in and out of traffic with my car never really hurt anyone that I knew of, I believed my words were the same. They could zip in and out of the traffic of the mind of others without impact or injury. Unimportant really, said and then gone. I understand the expression throwing caution to the wind. There are no brakes in this mentality, it is pedal to the metal at break neck speeds when racing ahead recklessly, sometimes carelessly. It is when my words have come back to me, the ones I did not choose but definitely came out of my mouth that I have that moment of pause, the one that has me thinking, maybe the stakes are a little too high? What if you slow down and choose what you want your message to be? What if you slow down and give others the right of way? What if...What about you Dear One? What about your words, your message? What if you slow down and consider your impact? What if we all did? What if...?

Relief from Truth

Relief can come from a middle of the night phone call

What does relief feel like for you dear reader? I have heard it described as a weight being lifted from the shoulders; being able to breath again; a lightness in the heart. Relief can come in the form of cool water on a hot day, either in a glass or an ocean. Relief can come when someone appears at your door, someone you have been longing to see. Relief can come from a middle of the night phone call. You fill in the ___________ dear reader. Relief can also come when truth is finally spoken and heard: there is an ah yes feeling to this experience. It is a relief to have confirmation that what has been suspected and felt for perhaps decades, is finally confirmed.

Truth whispers into the ear of the driver

I have this image of truth running around town, jumping on buses and sitting next to passengers. Some passengers notice truth and swat with get away from me hands. Others tilt their heads, listening intently, longing to hear every syllable. Truth weaves its way in and out of seats and the isle, visiting each person their, including the driver. Hopping off at stops, truth spots cars idling at red lights and pours itself in through open windows or through the vents. Truth hangs out with the driver, listening quietly to thoughts and muttered words. Truth whispers into the ear of the driver and a smile lights his face while in the car next to him, a frown appears-truth is visiting there too. Truth then flies into the radio, making announcements to listeners via airwaves on multiple stations. Many switch stations, listening for something more palpable. Others sit transfixed, mesmerized by the crystalline purity of truth perceived.

Some cover their ears trying to block out the resounding truth

Many someones tried to bury truth

Truth travels to grave sights, hospitals and back through time to homes with families living there. Someone, many someones, tried to bury truth, to throw it into the grave with the dead but it did not work. Truth resurrected. It could not be buried, held to lifelessness. It rose and whispered and spoke until it screamed and was heard by all. Some covered their ears trying to block out the resounding truth, still unwilling to accept. Others fell to their knees and begged for more Truth and begged again, please never leave me.

Truth can be breathed in and exhaled out

Truth is justice. Truth is undeniable. Truth is the backbone of every integrity filled Godly human. Truth is God revealed and experienced. Truth is life everlasting. Truth can be breathed in and exhaled out and it is everywhere at all times. Human, do you seek it as though it is your life line, or deny it as though it were the plague? 

God Relating

We all have a relationship with God, even if it is none existent. To deny him, avoid him, ignore Him is still a relationship, albeit a dysfunctional one. I talk to God daily, asking for His guidance, blessings and advice. Sometimes I even take the time to step away from my self serving ways to listen and hear what He wants me to know. It is a relationship working its way toward maturity but alas, I fall short in many of what could be called, The Divine Categories. What are the divine categories Dear Reader? At the very top of the list would be Submissive Servant, Humble Healer, Benevolent Benefactor. Near the bottom of the list you might find the categories of Procrastinating Prophet, Reluctant Receiver, Apathetic Apostle. How do you like these categories and did any others come to mind as you read them? I laugh at myself and my alliteration. It is entertaining to play with how I hold up and how I fall down in my relating to God. In the laughter, I recognize what areas need some improvement and which areas get at least a passing grade. Heck, in some categories I am OUTSTANDING...Forever Faithful and Correctable Child come to mind. Jesus asks this of us and nothing more, because it is beyond good enough Matthew 22:37-38 "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment." Well if this is the greatest commandment, than I am pretty confident I am in some bad company, because I have met very few people who have accomplished this goal. Next we have this, the second of the greatest commandments Matthew 22:39-40 "And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbour as yourself.' All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments." It occurs to me that we do love our neighbours as ourselves. Our lack of self love shows up all over the place in our relationships, doesn't it Dear One? We deny, avoid and ignore one another. We evade and run from responsible relating and in doing this, we un love the people in our lives and un love God Himself. How can I be what God wants me to be if these commands are far from my heart and galaxies apart from my being? Look around you at your relationships Dear Reader. How do you measure up against the standards Jesus spoke about as the greatest commandments that the Law and Prophets hang on? I have some work to do, what about you Dear One? Lets end with this truth. God Wants Us To Love.

With Mistakes

How do you read Dear Reader? Do you look for messages and meanings or are you a helpless, hopeless perennial proof reader? English majors can not help themselves, they get stuck on the hows and wherefores of what they read. Mistakes stick out like tacks sprinkled on the literary floor of their minds. All they can think of as they read and wince is "this writer needs some grammar and spelling lessons!" Maybe I am a corrector too? I think of things I have said and done that I need to clean up, reset, try again. The missteps of the psyche that litter the floor of my soul as I trip over myself and land flat on my face? Much connection and communication is taking place in text, printed words clicked onto screens all over the world. Some misspellings sans auto correct can be hilarious, mischievous, Freudian, dangerous and even dirty (you get to define what dirty means to you). Most misspellings are of the mundane variety and yet, we want to correct them so that the person on the receiving end of the message does not misunderstand. This surface level of communication is the catch, the guise for real connection. I had a friend say "I can translate" when a message was sent to him with mistakes...sweet sweet relief. He saw past the misplaced letters to the meat of the message, reassuring me that our conversation was of the real variety, not to be waylaid by tiny insignificant typing errors.

Now Dear One, lets talk about you, and me. We make mistakes of the mundane and minuscule variety. We also make mistakes of momentous magnitude and yet somehow they get "translated" when someone sees past our mistakes and missteps to the real you, the real me. The heart translates what words written and verbalized fail to do. It is forever and always the intentions of the heart that people read. Psalm 26:2-3 "Test me, O Lord, and try me, examine my heart and my mind; for your love is ever before me, and I walk continually in your truth." Humans are wonderful truth detectors. We try to hide from one another and yet, somehow our hearts are readable. Is this not the most magnificent gift, to be known by another for who we really are and not by the mistakes perceived or otherwise, we have made? We are being refined daily Dear One, for His glory. Don't let mistakes lead you away from The Truth. Let Love lead you to His perfect, understanding ways. 

Pigeonholed

To be pigeonholed means: a category, typically an overly restrictive one, to which someone or something is assigned. Have you, Dear Reader, ever felt categorized, assigned to a restrictive position and point of view by another or even, many others? Guilty, I am guilty of pigeonholing and God forgive me, I am learning my way out of this myopic way of looking at people. Eyes can be like heat seeking missiles on a destroy mission-mine look for beauty but are often drawn to flaw. Romans 7:14-15 "We know that the law is spiritual; but I am unspiritual, sold as a slave to sin. I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate to do." This is the battle that wages inside of us Dear One, the wanting to be of God and the reality of being in bodies with sinful natures. Purity fights along side, calling us to higher ground while our earthly inclinations keep us tethered to our own shortsighted ways. Thankfully, this is a common human experience, the desire to be and do what is good, pure, right and true and failing miserably and repeatedly. It is and always has been relational, this great divide. It is how we love or hate, accept or reject, welcome or turn our backs on each other that has us in the thick of intimate delightful relationship or its hellish ugly twin of cruelty to another. When we put someone into a category we put ourselves into one too. Romans 7:21-25 "So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God's law; but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law in my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God-through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself in my mind am a slave to God's law but in the sinful nature a slave to the law of sin." Let us be really clear. We all have our deviant ways, you know, the ones that we try to hide from others and even ourselves. You know what your ways are Dear Reader, they are for you to assess and confess. The heat seeking missile I spoke of earlier is a dart to the heart. God will reveal our greatest weaknesses and take us out of ourselves, helping us see with His eyes if we so desire. Is this, Dear One, what you desire, to see yourself and others with His all seeing loving eyes? Love is our greatest conquest. 

It Is Good

Two dogs live in my house. They act a lot like dogs. Complexity isn't a word I would use to describe a dog. While most dogs exhibit their own personality traits and tendencies, there is one thing all dogs appear to have in common. When a dog hears good dog or bad dog, they react. Ears and tails perk and wag to the words good boy, good girl. Ears and tails drop and tuck when they hear bad boy, bad girl. The last thing a dog wants to do is disappoint. A healthy dog, one that has been loved and considered, treated like a family member, has these normal and predictable behaviours. Alternatively, a dog that has been ignored, randomly or inappropriately disciplined can become defensive, self protective and ready to either cower or attack, depending on the level of maltreatment. I am not a dog expert. You may very well be a pro with poodles and other canines, I am strictly speaking from observation. What is my point, you ask? When dogs are told they are good, something happens to them. They soak in the wonderment. They look back with adoring melty eyes. It is one of the many reasons dog appreciators find them so endearing and irresistible. 

I must switch tracks Dear Reader, because while I enjoy two furries as household pets, it is the man/boy that I love more than life itself. I see how my son responses when he gets the idea that he is good. I do not mean this in the derogatory sense, the demeaning and often manipulative uses of the terms good and bad. I mean it in the I believe in you and what you are capable of way that only humans can convey, one human to another. I see him lift his head in wonder, eyes searching for confidence in mine when I speak encouragement to him. I see him straighten into the possibilities and I sense him believing too, that he is capable of much. We have influence on our children, on each other and lastly, on ourselves. This may seem strange to you to know that if you are calling yourself bad, not good enough or worse than these in your head, it makes your face fall, your soul sag and your heart hurt. If you are rating yourself based on performance and it translates into insecurity, it is inevitable that you will do the very same thing, perhaps to those you love the most. Your internal atmosphere becomes external weather and the cure, Dear One, is to learn love. Learn love for yourself first, so that you can give it freely to others. Let us restore our relationships with our families learning what love looks and sounds like so that this generation becomes the one that does "it right" for the next that follows. Look into my eyes Dear One, I believe you are capable of much, and it is good. 

Jacob & Israel

Unsavoury quality of deceptiveness

Masked and ready to wrestle

For the past several days, my hips have moved in and out of their sockets. At random I experience periodic hip relocation. I have had to move or stand to click one or the other hip back into place. While driving, I felt again the strange hip out of place discomfort. As I shifted in my seat to put things back where they belong I said to God "I don't want to be Jacob God! I give, I give!" The story of Jacob is a poignant one that I can relate to and perhaps, you can too dear reader? It is the classical story of the striving of man to succeed, utilizing his own influence via deception and manipulation to make gains at the expense of his fellow man, at the expense of his own brother. Jacob was named Jacob meaning "heel grasper" because his little hand was gripping his twin brothers heel as he made his exit from the womb first. As Jacob grew, "The name became proverbial for the unsavoury quality of deceptiveness." (This note is taken from my NIV Study Bible). You have only to read the story to see if perhaps, you have an affinity with one or more of the characters in this real life history of our ancestors.

Intrigue is man made

The intrigue is man made. Running in the back ground is the eternal story of Gods ordinances, his requests to trust in him and his plan. Alas, we would have no stories at all, except ones of pure joy and delight if we were to follow where he leads. Perhaps, this is far too boring for us dear one? I mean really, what is life without havoc and the horror of human hacking into human? Back to Jacob.

Wrestling with God

There is a river crossing in the story. Jacob is returning home and has fear of retaliation in his heart. He supplanted his brother and wants peace and forgiveness from him, knowing that what he really deserves is decimation. Jacob is alone and a man appears. They wrestle all night and the man touches Jacob in the hip socket, wrenching it. Jacob refuses to let the man go until he is blessed. This is crucial for Jacob and for the future of a nation.

"The man asked him, "What is your name?" "Jacob," he answered. Then the man said, "Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel, because you have struggled with God and with men and have overcome." Jacob said, "Please tell me your name." But he replied, "Why do you ask my name?" Then he blessed him there. So Jacob called the place Peniel, saying, "It is because I saw God face to face, and yet my life was spared" (Genesis 32:27-31).

Jacob walked with a limp for the rest of his days, a reminder and warning to him (and to all) that if God had wanted to, He could have done far worse to Jacob. God, our Good God, always has redemptive plans for us, far grander than we can possibly imagine.

Man is not your enemy, you may be your own worst enemy

Your name, it means something. Maybe, it matches who you are. On the other hand, perhaps it is time for a new one that matches the person you have been designed by God to be, the one you are becoming? Go to the river, cross over it. Trust God to lead the way to his way. Man is not your enemy, in fact, you may be your own worst enemy. It does not have to be. You can be different. You can be what God sees in you. You don't have to walk with a metaphorical limp for the rest of your days. Stop wrestling with God, tell him "I give".

May you be richly blessed. 

God & Humans

Humans are wonderfully made and horribly managed. God makes us and then hands us over to each other. I laugh at this, because I believe God is perfect and the irony is, He knows what we are capable of and yet, He still insists on handing sweet innocent babies over to parents unsuited for the task. I am feeling slightly nervous as I walk gingerly on paper thin ice...questioning Gods decisions feels dangerous and my courage is beginning to escape me. Let us proceed with caution and see where He takes us Dear Reader.

We had a great wind storm a couple of days ago. Toppled trees landed on roof tops and cars. What about the birds? Have you every wondered about where they go in a wind storm? I have never seen a flock of dead birds littering the ground after a storm despite their living outside, subjected to all weather systems. How do they survive? While there is evidence of wind damage, there is much more evidence of survival and wind resistance. Not all trees topple in a storm, in fact, the majority have all limbs intact, as if the wind never was. And the birds...I see them flying, flirting with each other and the wind, nary a care or concern for their mortality. Are you a toppled tree, felled by a mighty wind? Are you a sweet displaced bird, with no cosy homey nest to return to after the storm? Perhaps the wind has ripped through you and you swayed to its rhythm with your limbs waving wildly, threatening to break and yet, you have somehow remained intact, at least, on the outside...

I don't know why we hurt one another. I don't know why parents hurt their children. I have no excuses or explanations for cruelty. All I know is that this is not Gods will. It is evil and repulsive in His sight and while we look away from our own pain, try to bury it and carry on as though nothing has happened, we perpetuate, perpetrate, generate more of the same in a vile cycle of repetition in one form or another. Containment is near impossible while healing, sweet Godly healing is forever an option. Psalm 91:1-4 "Those who live in the shelter of the Most High will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty. This I declare about the Lord: He alone is my refuge, my place of safety; he is my God, and I trust him. For he will rescue you from every trap and protect you from deadly disease. He will cover you with his feathers. He will shelter you with his wings. His faithful promises are your armor and protection." This is internal Dear Reader. The outside of all living things die, we are mortal. The shelter of His wings is for the wounded bird in each of us, the one that wants and needs comfort and protection from the hurt at the hands of humans. You deserve the love and healing that will restore you to whole. Turn to Him for refuge and let the healing begin. 

Mixed Bag of Emotions

Emotions are a mixed bag of tricks, aren't they Dear Reader? I recently played the game Trouble. In the game, each player attempts to secure their own safety by getting to the spot on the board that represents "home". In the playing, there can be strategy ranging from ruthless killing that results in opponents having to start again, to the most obnoxious benevolence, where killing is avoided at all costs. Guess which kind of player I am? I play to win Dear Reader, just in case you weren't sure. I am a dice popping opponent slaying chortling when I kill type of player. This, I admit comfortably, is my dark side enlivened in a harmless game of chance with morals and emotions somehow thrown into the mix. Hurt feelings would be ridiculous in playing this game and yet, there is a strange sense of low level anxiety when someone pops the dice and each player wonders, will my little primary coloured man on the board survive or be pushed back to the starting blocks? Amplify this game of Trouble and look at its intricacies, played out innocently enough on a plastic covered painted board. The creators of the game named it well because it is a microcosm of real life, simplified and designed to replicate some of the real life people navigations we experience daily. Each players view of the world and how they treat others can be analysed...Do you play to win at all costs? Does it matter to you if feelings are hurt as you try to make it home to safety? Are you cautious around others, worried about what they will think if you "kill" them in order to live yourself? Do you tiptoe around the board, politely ensuring that everyone stays safe, ignoring the end goal, forgetting the reason you started playing in the first place? What is ignored in your polite deference to others and their needs being met? If you are a ruthless player, what pain inflicted on other do you disregard to ensure your needs are met? What emotions do you mute, ignore, disregard in the troubled life you live, Dear One? What if there is room for expression for all of them? What would the game of life look like for you than? Uncomfortable politeness serves no one and is not a place to land or stay. Sometimes trouble is exactly what we need to stir us from our revelry, get our emotional juices flowing so that we can choose to make it "home" based on what we love and how we want to live with our selves and in community. Emotions are wonderful in all of their glorious expressions, even the ones that surface from discomfort. How willing are you to allow all expressions of who you are? When this becomes your new way, you open the doors to others and they too, get to be free to share what is in their hearts and on their minds. The End goal, Dear One, is for everyone to make their way home. 

What Would Love Say?

Life isn't math and yet it is

I don't know about you dear reader, but I just don't have the answers to life's most challenging questions. In the past year, I have had so many ominous experiences that my "problem solving" capabilities evaporated into thin air, leaving me with very little "deductive reasoning" for "conflict resolution". I laugh here at the quotation marks that accentuate the logical. Life isn't math and yet it is, because when logic evades, cosmic forces work out the equation in the spiritual realm. I believe this is what is known as paradox, or at least, it is my experience of paradox, defined as: a seemingly absurd or contradictory statement or proposition which when investigated may prove to be well founded or true.

Here is a paradoxical statement for you "One man gives freely, yet gains even more; another man withholds unduly, but comes to poverty. A generous man will prosper; he who refreshes others will himself be refreshed" (Proverbs 11:24-25).

In giving we receive, this is the bottomline dear reader. I must qualify this statement, temper it with truth. We do not give to receive. The math does not add up when the intention is to gain from giving. There is no nobility in believing that we will be rewarded for our obvious attempts at false generosity. Scripture is pointing to love, dear one.

The Bible is clear

Love is the hand that feeds, clothes, waters. Love comforts and embraces. Love says when you see need in your fellow man, give, fill them up and you will fill to overflowing. It does not make sense and yet it is the most stunning, jaw dropping truth that ever was and ever will be. Love asked me to trust in this truth each time my house of logical cards tumbled in a heap. Love asked me to submit to its mysterious ways and I weep, astounded with the outcomes, unpredictable and predictable at the same time, a paradox. The Bible is very clear. It is the living breathing word of God and by turning to and trusting in it, in Him, I am living in dumbfounded joy! Outcomes are guaranteed in the bible, all we need do is follow the guidance and advice clearly outlined there for us.

Gods math is paradoxical

Here is a quote from a dear gentle souled friend "The Holy Spirit has been dancing all around, so many exciting and wonderful things happening." Here is some real life math for you dear one. God + You = Heaven on earth. It is the oldest most glorious equation of all time.

Usury

Who has their hands in your pockets?
The banks are users. Usury is defined as "the practice of lending money and requiring the borrower to pay a high amount of interest." You know this is true when you look at your mortgage interest payments. Similarly, perhaps you have fallen into the trap of making minimum payments on credit, only to discover that the interest you pay is far greater than what the item you purchased cost at the till. This is how banks get rich and can pay to occupy space on almost every conceivable city corner-banks are a dime a dozen, as the saying goes.

The relationship of indebtedness makes us servants
There exists in this relationship of borrowing and lending, an indebtedness imbalance:

The rich ruleth over the poor, and the borrower is the servant to the lender (Proverbs 22:7)

Rich ruler, poor borrower, servant of the lender. What does this imagery stir up in you, dear one? It curls my lip in agitation. One human owing (owning) another, to the point of servitude, is not the plan, has never been Gods plan.

Traveling to the dark side, to emotional usury
Travel with me to the dark side, dear reader. Let us suppose the usury is of an emotional nature, emotional blackmail and entrapment, so to speak? Here is where the inky darkness has its wonton way with unsuspecting, hapless victims. What if the user grooms the victim, over time garnering hefty penalties in the form of over payment, indebtedness via obligation, a sense of duty, with a life sentence of more of the same, with no end in sight? Even in the game of monopoly, a lucky player can draw a get out of jail for free card. 

With emotional usury, there doesn't appear to be an escape on the horizon, no pass-without-punishment card draw. Here is the infamous crossroads so often mentioned in metaphor. Choose continued enslavement or choose freedom, no luck required: the only necessity here is consciousness.

You must choose differently if you want to be free
The taker, the user, he/she, will not stop taking as long as you are giving dear one. If you can relate to enslavement, if you believe or conceive that someone has power over you, might I suggest you choose to break free? 

Is this easier said then done? Yes, it is, and for this reason: It is to God you must turn for your get-out-of-jail-for-free card. This requires you to humble yourself, go before him, and ask for help. He has the answers that we all seek and when we ask, wait and listen, cell doors clang open, and the enslaved are free to walk out of their personal prisons, into the light.

God does not want you to be used dear reader. He wants you to be free

January 1, 2022

Addendum: I am truly astounded with the situation we find ourselves in.

This piece of writing was originally published March 7th, 2017. It saddens me greatly, to see that while the warning signs were clearly in place, ungodly ways with money prevailed to the point of a global enslavement and servitude to users, those that have blackmailed the many, at the cost of their own lives, and that of their children. Usury...

Bull In a China Shop

Do you know any bulls of the human variety Dear Reader? I know a couple and I am loathe to admit that I have been one at times in my life. The metaphor is clear, there is no room for a huge horned animal in a shop with fragile precious breakables. Translation, a human acting like an imposing animal with disregard for the sensitivities of other humans can cause great ramie damage, leaving behind broken relationships and mouth gaping stunned ness in it's wake. Destruction. China cups and teapots, intricately crafted. Human beings with souls, Divinely Designed. Both deserve care with handling. I recall watching a documentary in which tea was poured elegantly, slowly. I see in my minds eye the steam coming off of the hot brew, as though in slow motion. The swirling vapour travels upward as the liquid cascades downward. I imagine the scent of the tea as enticement to the waiting lips and tongue that would have it languish there before trailing across the tastebuds and flowing smoothly down the back of the throat. The memory is exquisitely picturesque and I have returned to it many a time when I too, pour hot liquid into waiting cup. Time is built into the experience, enhancing anticipation.

Appreciating this kind of complexity cannot happen when we are rushed Dear Reader. Relationships can have this savour the flavour feeling too, given time and space, tasteful waiting and elegant anticipating. There is no room for noticing when we barge into each others lives, thoughts, space with our own destructive head and horns swinging. There is no room for a bull(y) in my relationship with you, your relationship with me. One of us, is bound to be gored if the bull in us is let loose. The rawness of it all is this, we are each preciously made, adorned and adored by The Master Craftsman. We are His sweet, intricate, delicate teacups. To continue this somewhat cheesy analogy, we can pour quickly into one another spilling and burning or we can pour slowly with care, ensuring the hot liquid remains contained and ultimately savoured. The timing and choices are ours. Won't you handle others with care today, Dear One? Consider this your invitation to elegance. 

Playing Catch

I watched the Oscars this week. What impressed me was the seemingly natural improvisational skills of the actors in the audience as they interacted with the master of ceremonies. If a ball is thrown your way, does it hit you in the face, chest, groin, graze your body or do you somehow inexplicably catch the ball, even when you were not expecting one? I watched the actors metaphorically catching the ball, playing with it a bit and tossing it back, garnering some laughter from on lookers. The cleverness of spontaneous interaction appealed to the audience. Quick wit and surprising reactions captured the imagination. The imagination used in the moment had my eyes glued. I marvelled at the clever interpersonal play that pointed to intelligence. I am reminded that when an entire auditorium is filled with people from one industry, the brilliance of their abilities becomes effervescent and captivating. The actors at the awards have practiced their craft with countless hours invested in learning the art of improv. What may have started out as a natural inclination became finely tuned with attentive care and training. This brings us to you and me, Dear Reader. When you are thrown a mischievous glance, a becoming smile, a quick hello or a happy inquiry, what do you do with it? When a smirk or a frown, a smile upside down is lobbed in your direction, what do you do with it? Do they hit you in the face, chest, groin, graze your body and bounce off of you? Are you able to catch them cat like, play in the moment and then toss them to another without injury to you or them? Much of our time is spent in regret of the fumble, the dropping of the ball. In hindsight we see what we could have, should have, wished we had done. The opportunity to be playful is often lost. Instead of playing catch, we just get hit. What is my point, you wonder? Perhaps in the light of this day it is this: let there be play. How we respond to one another, regardless of what comes our way, can make or break mood, sense of self worth, ability to positively and powerfully impact others and the environment. A ball is coming fast at you Dear Reader, choose to duck, dodge or catch, but don't let it hit you in the face for goodness sakes. As The Great Umpire in the sky calls "Play ball", choose to get into the game! Spontaneous fun awaits you. 

Compunctious Nature

Compunction is defined as: a feeling of guilt or moral scruple that prevents or follows the doing of something bad. 

Do you feel guilt, dear reader? How about your scruples, defined as: a feeling of doubt or hesitation with regard to the morality or propriety of a course of action. Are your scruples feeling violated because of a course of action you have taken or are considering, taking? 

I had a good heart to heart with myself this morning and had an experience of self observation, that revealed parts of me that feel on the questionable side. As observer, I could see these identities that have taken up space in my character, that are incongruent with my scruples, morals, values, belief system. 

These "others" inside of me were vying for time, wanting attention, and taking up precious space in my psyche. Taking a good hard uncompromising look, helped me see that I get to root out the parts of me that are incongruent with my ultimate personality and character development goals. 

Are you working on your own personality and character development dear one? It is a life long project of painful and freeing discovery and growth, is it not? What parts of you are you wanting to root out? I will tell you mine now, in the hopes that you get out some of that gumption of yours, and courageously decide to have your own private heart to heart intervention!

Here, in a nutshell, are my "others" that don't belong: The critical eye and the needy one. 

These characters have been tenacious, and have alternated between hiding in the wings, and taking centre stage whenever opportunity presents itself. They are the least likeable parts of me and as observer, I know they are not at all me. 

It is a strange thing, recognizing that how we think and behave are and are not us, all in the same moment? It is an awareness that allows for choice and change, a decision to be different as "they" shrink, and Spirit grows. I know that when I am being critical of myself or others, or when I am needing the approval of man, this is when I am farthest from God. The "others" keep me self occupied causing guilt, with a sense of assault, to my morals. Fortunately, I feel compunction and from this point onward, self assessment and moral course correction takes place. 

Keeping internal dialogue open means I can hear Gods voice. I can hear Him asking me

• Is this what you really believe? 
• Is this who you really are? 

I know better, I want better for you, return to Me and I will abide in you." John 15:5 "If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit." 

Your turn, dear reader:

• What "others" have taken up uninvited residence in your heart, soul, psyche?
• How important is it to your personality and character development to root them out? 

The real you that God sees, is waiting to permanently take centre stage, for His glory and in service of humanity. 

Have your private heart to heart today, why wait?