Never Underestimate Viciousness

Recently I began re-reading Joe Navarro's book, Dangerous Personalities: An FBI Profiler Shows How To Identify And Protect Yourself From Harmful People. I recommend this book often as a guide to help clients, and friends too, discern who, or should I say, what, they are dealing with, when someone in their personal life is unreasonable or near impossible, to interact with productively. 

There are descriptions in the book, words to capture the essence of the meanness of spirit in each of the four difficult personalities. Extensive questionnaires can help an almost desperate person determine that perhaps it is not them that has a problem, despite continually being accused of many wrongdoings and beings, and that maybe, just maybe, the person in their life that makes them feel insecure, self-conscious, inept, out of their depth, is really the other, that difficult person that is impossible to please. 

Joe Navarro is a careful person. He is full of care ... he watches, listens intently, notices, reads between the lines of a person's story, and without withholding, labels perfectly what he sees, with compassion for the prey, the victims that have been worn down to the point of being worn out. My poignant point is this: a kind person is no match for a vicious type of dressed up predator. Some people really don't have a conscience, cannot be reasoned with, will never concede a point no matter how wrong they are proven, and will ultimately, pridefully, insist the sweet one must bend to their will, or they will make that person's life a living hell. 

One of my most famous lines, something I made up and continue to boast about because I think it so clever (come on dear reader, give me some slack here, I rarely brag and just feel like it, just this once ... ) is, Drop naïveté on it's head, and make sure it's dead! In other words, Don't kid yourself sister/brother, if the person you are dealing with hasn't changed, and you have tried absolutely every way to make good in the relationship, then don't expect anything different from him or her, any time soon. These people think YOU have to change, that there is something wrong with ME, or them over there. They don't get that it just so happens, they are the problem, but wait a minute ... wait one minute ... YES they do know they are the difficult one, and they LIKE IT! 

Killing the innocent belief that a difficult person will come around to healthy thinking, or that you or I can somehow affect change in them, or that they are clueless in understanding what they are doing, is necessary. The difficult person knows exactly what they are doing, sees the impact they have on others, and enjoys the hot mess of dissembling another. 

If you are dealing with a difficult person, and have finally come to the conclusion that you are ill equipped to help them into becoming a better human being that actually cares about others, then here is my bit of advice for you: let their soliloquies fall on deaf ears, and start making your exit plan in private, meaning do not share your discoveries about this person with them ~ that's like waving steak in front of a ravenous lion's bared teeth ~ but do share your experiences with at least one trusted friend and or family member, that loves you and will assist you when the time is right. With ears that no longer hear and absorb the lies and manipulations of the difficult one, you will start to hear your own sound mind advising you on your next steps of self-preservation. 

Know this: no one wants to hear the sound of vitriol frothing forth from a blathering idiot that enjoys the taste of his or her own venomous tongue, accept the blathering idiot themselves. Once you stop being the audience, they may temper tantrum and rage but you will be free from mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually, absorbing their poison. No one should be a sponge for this kind of viciousness, and you can break free in many mini, and then huge ways, once you accept the circumstances and refrain from making excuses for the nasty person you are dealing with. You must not aid and abet the cruel spirited ones ... they will relentlessly, guiltlessly aim to destroy you, and it will, be their pleasure to do so. 

God is intolerant of the froward ~ a person difficult to deal with, contrary. If he will not tolerate this type of backwardness in a man or woman, what makes you think you can manage him or her? 

Psalm 101:3-8 

I will set no wicked thing before mine eyes: I hate the work of them that turn aside; it shall not cleave to me. A froward heart shall depart from me: I will not know a wicked person. Whoso privily slandereth his neighbour, him will I cut off: him that hath an high look and a proud heart will not I suffer. Mine eyes shall be upon the faithful of the land, that they may dwell with me: he that walketh in a perfect way, he shall serve me. He that worketh deceit shall not dwell within my house: he that telleth lies shall not tarry in my sight. I will early destroy all the wicked of the land; that I may cut off all wicked doers from the city of the LORD.

1 Pray, and pray some more, dear reader, to be delivered from your situation so that you do not have to spend the rest of your days defending yourself from the onslaughts these difficult types enjoy slaughtering with. 

2 Next plan your future, without that person in it. For the sake of your own well-being, and that of any dependants you happen to mutually share, you must make your escape sooner rather than later. You run the risk of ruin for little ones, each day they are exposed to the demonically influenced difficult personality. I say demonically influenced with confidence here, because godly people that love like Jesus, would never treat others violently or viciously, demeaning and demolishing them with words, or actions. Don't rush, but do know that time works against you the longer you stay in intimate relationship with them.

Isaiah 43:16-18

Thus saith the LORD, which maketh a way in the sea, and a path in the mighty waters; which bringeth forth the chariot and horse, the army and the power; they shall lie down together, they shall not rise: they are extinct, they are quenched as tow. 

The Bible can be your sanctuary, your personal guide to health and safety from the storms stirred by that froward person in your life. God will provide a way of escape while your enemy pursues, and he can remove a difficult person without you plotting or planning their demise. All you need to do is be honest, telling yourself and others the truth about what you are living through, and your trusted ones will be on your side, at the ready, to assist, as I said above, when God gives you a green light to take action. 

Attacking Islam Doesn't Make Sense

Dear reader, please listen well with your reading eyes: there is absolutely no reason for the devil and his crew of demons, to attack Islam. When Christians imply that if Islam were attacked ~ the way Christianity has been mauled and molested in Paris France recently during the opening of the Olympics ~ they would burn the place down, I just plain old shake my greying head.

Come on now, people! We are in a spiritual battle and it behooves us to know our enemy and who he targets. Satan hates JESUS and he hates CHRIST followers, he enjoys tormenting everyone of course, but his arrows are aimed at the children of God, and now more publicly than ever before; he knows time is short, and we ought to too.

Just to be plain here, let us look at what is so offensive, to most healthy minded individuals, regardless of their religious affiliations. Men parading about as caricatures of women, or flaming foolish strange little men with their genitalia conveniently bouncing about to not only attract attention but to send a sodomitic message, outside of their too short short shorts, is disgusting and repulsive to the majority of the masses. The complaints are accumulating, and being duly noted by advertisers that feel their bottom line, pun intended, is threatened. My guess is they ought to have checked out their business partners before investing so heavily in the sin soaked extravaganza known as the 2024 Paris Olympics. 

Now listen again with your discerning eyes. Jesus is the way, the truth, the life, and Satan is the father of malicious lies, deception and destruction: he works day and night to counter the message of light, hope, love, forgiveness, and mercy, found only in a saving grace relationship with the Redeemer. The lights going out in Paris is a little hint to those that adore Lucifer, that this present darkness, although not completely as of yet pitch black, will soon be, for those that persist in their trying to ungod the Almighty; those that reach out and try to pull him from heaven and stomp on him and his saints. 

God does not suffer fools for long, nor is he mocked. Power outages are a funny little thing, aren't they dear one? Are you afraid of the dark?

About a year ago this fall, my son and I went for a walk in a woods near the river. It was agreeably an ill advised time to go, since it was twilight and the path edges line a treacherous ravine in some spots, with trippy tree roots as built in steps. My night vision isn't the greatest without light, and as the inky darkness closed in upon us, I simply could not see! Man alive, the first time I tripped and fell that evening, I landed hard on my hands and knees. The second time I fell, I panicked, because I knew that night animals like coyotes, frequented these woods, and perhaps I would be their easy, injured prey? 

Perhaps in the darkness, people feel the bright eyes of wolves peering at them, ready to pounce and tear flesh from bone ... or they sense the influx of demons, ready to devour ... and they would not be wrong.

Professing Christians really need to know what they are about. They need to focus on Christ and accept that the worldly will, and do, target our faith in God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Ghost. We must keep in mind that we are promised persecution in this life, and that we are to be salt and light, in the looming, dooming, dreadful darkness. Our hope is in the Saviour, and we have to keep our eyes on the promise of eternity with him once our numbered days are checked off the calendar of this existence.  

Let us not convolute, compare, complain, that we are being attacked and other religious groups remain unhindered in their seemingly godly pursuits. It is whiny and immature to suggest how unfair it is that Christianity is being blatantly maligned, when we know that Jesus, the perfect Man/God without sin, was spat upon, cursed, beaten, bruised, and crucified for our iniquities. 

If you know your Bible, you know what to expect, and to suggest what is happening is inequitable, implies you bought the bs, that if you keep your nose clean, keep your head down and work hard, and just believe, you will be permitted free entrance into the land of prosperity, and have not troubles in this life:

And he said to them all, if any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me (Luke 9:23)

Take up his CROSS: we must take up our own cross and follow in HIS holy footsteps ... this means certain suffering, dear one. If this frightens you more than the dark woods with wolves roaming and demons ready to devour, then you are not a Christian, you are prey. 

NOTE: The picture I include above is Paris in blackout. See the glow of a church, off in the distance: need I say more, about the Light?

Good Grief

Good grief. In my head I hear Charlie Brown saying this ... 

Grief, she is not good (imagine with your ears, a Spanish accent). Sorrow, he is not my friend (now a French accent). In any language, grief and sorrow are never good, they are soulful hardships that we pass through numbly, sometimes dumbly, always with a deep sense of pain that cannot be touched with the pleasure of food, drink, happy thoughts, good company, or any form of entertainment. 

I don't know what to do with myself dear reader. I walk, I eat, I hydrate, I see clients and talk to friends and I just plain old float, drifting along with no destination in sight, or need to establish one either. My get up and go has gotten up and gone. 

I miss my sister, and there is no way of getting around the feeling. The other day I heard the front door and my heart leapt in my chest, with the thought of it being her trying to enter in for one of her pop over visits. Alas, my hope was dashed, a millisecond later, when I remembered, once again, that it could not possibly be her, no matter how desperately I longed that it would be, her. 

Death is one of those knock out punch moments. It hits you and you find yourself flat out on the square ringed mat, wondering what was that? Getting up seems impossible and when you do, you think, for what? I'm gonna get hit again with that horrid knowing, that constant reminder, that she is gone and I'm still here, and I can't close the gap, I can't just open the door and say, Nells, and then hear one of her cockamamie stories while shaking my head and thinking, where does she come up with this stuff?! 

Yesterday, I shed not a tear, tonight though, I simply cannot stop thinking and missing and weeping. Maybe you are in this spot too, dear reader? If so, I am sorry you are suffering, and I won't say something stupid, like, Time will heal your heart, or This too shall pass, because fresh grief and sorrow do not like these words meant to mask the pain or supplant it somehow. 

All we have is getting used to not having the person we miss around. We pass our days and adjust, and that becomes a form of accepting. Isn't it wonderful, dear one, to miss another, to long for them, to wish they were near? How terrible if when you or I die, it is without sentiment, or sadness, or the longing that goes with a love tie that says, You belonged to me, and God gave us to one another. 

Jesus wept, this is my solace. He gets it. My lost and lonely feeling is not lost on him. The concept of him wiping away my tears after counting them all is a kindness I cannot fathom ... he counts our tears ... can you comprehend this truth, dear reader? If he counts ours, this means he counted those of my sister, and those that poured from the eyes of your dearly departed too. He was with my sister, and he was with your mother, father, uncle, aunt, cousin, brother, sister, husband, wife, and dare I say ... dare I say, child too, if you have suffered this almost unspeakable loss?

We are each alone, and with, and then alone again. Our only constant companion is God as ever present. He cannot be cruel or mean, because he is love. In the quiet, still, I move in the direction of looking to him for soothing and calm from my stormy unsettled feelings.

That is all, dear one. Just a little bit of me in the black and white world of print on paper. Missing, longing, and plain old sad. What's a gal to do?

What is Happening?

Wondering what is happening? I have heard this refrain a couple of times just this week, What is happening? 

I know what is happening, but the people that aren't in the know, haven't a clue. The one thing they all have in common is the one thing they refuse to suspect, is causing any or all of their pain, suffering, symptoms, and eventually, their "sudden" unexpected demise. 

In the 2020 series entitled Utopia, a plan to attack human reproductive abilities is revealed. Find below a synopsis:

The comic book fans discover a global conspiracy. The comic book contains clues of future events because it is written by one of the architects of a plan designed to prevent ecological disaster as the Earth's population rises and resources are depleted. The plan consists of: (1) Convincing the world's population that there is an outbreak of a deadly new virus, (2) Once convinced of the narrative of the faux-pandemic, announce to the public the creation of a new vaccine, (3) Through the coordination between global elites and non-governmental organizations, governments move quickly to inject the world's population with this "vaccine". (4) Once the population is injected, it turns out that the vaccine is designed to sterilize almost all of those people that take it, causing the global population to drop from 7.8 billion to about 500 million, and ushering in a new era of plenty. 

1 CONvince the world's population of a deadly outbreak of a new virus

2 CONvinced the population of faux-pandemic, announcing ad nauseam that a new vaccine has been 'warp speed' developed and distributed, to save the world 

3 Moving quickly, so that no one has time to think, talk, consider, the pressure to conform was amped so high that people crumbled and acquiesced to the every whim and bidding of perfect strangers

4 Once injected, woman experience a second go at menses post menopause; middle aged and older women suffer new and seemingly endless, unrelenting menopausal sypmtoms; young woman of reproducing age have "periods" for months on end; babies do not survive the womb, dying there, or shortly after entering the world; strange cancers grow and flourish where at one time, egg and sperm met, and babies were created from the coupling. Men have odd lingering cancers in their private manly parts, and well, we have a conspiracy lived out, explaining, What is happening.

The devil hates you and me so much, he wants us all dead. What better way to accomplish his goal, then to have us help him out, by falling for a pre-planned demonically designed, murder/suicide scenario. By getting injected with devil juice, one unwittingly agreed to their own illnesses and physical ending, because they did not suspect who it was that pushed the plunger through the fluid in the barrel of syringes that flowed from needle, into tender, healthy, capable, strong, God made arms. 

Dear reader, perhaps you know what is happening, what is going on, and have all along. Perhaps you suspected instantly who was behind the atrocities we mutually face daily, and if so, I am preaching to the choir. But if you didn't, and your ears are perked at this point, and you are considering what you are reading, as an answer to the question of, What is happening, then perhaps you will stop running from the Truth that everywhere you turn, there are only dead ends, and no way out...

There are good guys and bad guys; there are angels and demons; there is one God in heaven, and the Devil does indeed roam the earth. You are in peril if you decide to continue to pretend this isn't so. You endanger yourself further when you persist in this blind, deaf, and dumb (spiritually and intellectually) stance of wondering what is happening, after being told in innumerable ways, EXACTLY what is happening. 

I will spell it out in no uncertain terms, for the sake of your soul. If people are dying all around you because they have suddenly taken ill, or are just dropping dead out of the blue, and if you have strange and sometimes unmentionable and unspeakable body excretions or messy eruptions, then you can be confident that they, and you, have been poisoned. 

I tell you this because you will die, not necessary from what your body has absorbed, but simply due to the irrefutable truth that death is inevitable. The fact that millions and perhaps billions of people have been lethally injected, ups the anti of death being eminent for the masses in ways it hadn't been in the past. The ploy in the past was more world war-ish, you know the idea: kill off young men of reproductive age en masse, and leave the women alone to feed and, fend for, themselves. There is no need to only use the horrors of war to reduce the population, when there is an easier, cleaner, more insidious ploy, that the humans can volunteer to participate in, and bring their children along too. 

This godless society of people trusts each other more than they do their Creator. This misplacing of faith in their fellow man, dear reader, is what needs to be repented, if one is to live, perhaps be healed, and go to heaven when leaving this world for what lies in the great, or alternatively terrifying, beyond. 

I aim to turn things around for souls in peril. I aim to strip people of convenient self-deception that precludes accountability and understanding too, of What is happening. I pray for redemption, forgiveness, and a return to believing that God and God alone can be trusted as Rescuer, a solution to our sickness, and a salve for our spirit. I beat this drum when called to, and as I face the future, I comprehend that the bad news will continue to roll in, as death tolls rise, of people I know and are related to in friendship or as family. I must warn, plead, and petition, that you heed, and tell others, that we are living a mutual predicted nightmare, and it will only get worse.

My only hope is that people are shaken awake to reality, and turn to God in their most desperate time of need, and then stay. Stay with Him, when and if a crisis of the soul has been averted, to glorify Him, praising Him for His mercy. You might succumb to the poison in your veins and tissues, but your soul can go to heaven, and God wants none to be lost, so let that be your comfort before your eyes close to this world, one last time. 

Jesus is the Saviour of the world. He sees and knows all, and it is to Him you must go for forgiveness and reassurance. Humans aren't going to do the "trick", only He can work miracles in your life and in the lives of those you love. 

Matthew 11:28

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. 

Go

To 

Him

Rage-Bait

Have you heard of rage-baiting, dear reader? defined as:

"Rage-baiting or rage-farming is internet slang that refers to a manipulative tactic to elicit outrage with the goal of increasing internet traffic, online engagement, revenue and support."

Copying and pasting this definition is humous to me. When I heard the term rage-bait, I instantly appreciated having experienced it, pretty much all my life, and long before the internet was discovered as a way to irritate and instigate disturbances with unsuspecting would be victims of manipulation. Hell, the internet has nothing on the people I have dealt with, that just plain old love to stir the bottom of the sludge barrel to see what ugly critters creep, crawl, and scuttle to the surface. In old fashioned terms, this type of person used to be called a trouble maker, a gossip, a backstabber, treacherous, and my all time favourite, demon possessed. 

You know you are dealing with the type, when during conversation, they shoot out a zinger with a spiky hook attached, designed to drag you into the fray, into their frightfully ugly inner workings. You might be having a perfectly lovely day, with cheery thoughts or even sadly sweet thoughts and then BAM, the monster in the person you know, suddenly says something so horrible, ire instantly rises in your soul. You next think, What the heck; did she/he SAY THAT? How, WHY for goodness sakes!

I was considering the rage-baiter and how they never seem to run out of material to irk and irritate, kind of like a stand up comic that everyone likes: always working on a new gag or line. What I have observed though, is that there is a definite pattern to the person, they have distinctive ways, and once you or I figure out the sketch of who they are, we can see how they try to fill in their blanks, with bits and pieces of us. I am seeing these people as vapid vampires. They have an emptiness that needs filling, and they get their jollies from insinuating and insulting, and getting the goat of whomever they set their target sites on: and by God they can be relentless too, in their pursuit of injuring their prey. 

Recently I got most excellent advice: don't care what they (the person or persons) think. This was one of those eureka moments for me! I mean seriously, if someone is an agitator, and there is no evidence of possible change in their behaviour in sight, then it makes logical sense for the irritated person to do some changing! We can step out of the ring, dear reader, and let the trouble making demoniacs shadow box all the live long day, and night too, if they want to. The thing we MUST KEEP IN MIND, is they do not get any satisfaction when they don't have a play toy to toss around, and that is when they will use secret weapons, pulled from their manipulative tool box: charm, feigned kindness, weakness, interest in your opinion or perspective, or some other emotional state to stimulate interaction. I warn you, these tactics are ploys to reel you and others into their naughty net, and extricating yourself is much harder than avoiding getting caught in the first place!

I am going to give you some insights to help you determine what, or should I say who, you are dealing with, so that you can decide for yourself whether or not you still want to care about what they think, or engage as you have before, with your rage-baiter.

The person is people repellant! They make everyone uncomfortable, shut down sharing, interfere with freely expressed emotions, say horrible things seemingly out of the blue, use information as a weapon to drive wedges between people, repeat what has been shared in confidence, make things up, lie, and then lie when they are caught lying! They never admit they are wrong, never apologize, and somehow have a self-righteous belief that since their opinion is the only valid one, it can be expressed no matter the impact it has on everyone else concerned ... they start emotional fires that singe and have you and me thinking about what they said for hours and sometimes days afterward, wondering, why would they SAY THAT? If all this sounds familiar, then you know you have someone in your life that really digs seeing you get all flustered. MAKE NO MISTAKE, dear one, THEY LIKE their little games, and don't give a damn what impact it has on you or anyone else. 

So ... maybe you can not care about their thoughts, their opinions, their ideas, and maybe you can escape when they start down that well-worn path of your destruction (sure, that was an awkward sentence, but so is dealing with this strange kind of person). There are people that make you feel loved, and their are people that profess their love but make you feel hated. Judas kissed Jesus after betraying Him as His friend and rabbi ... what makes you think the person you are dealing with, isn't capable of that kind of demonic wickedness too?

Break free, so you don't get emotionally dragged through the mud again. You may have to stay in relationship, but you can establish some distance markers, to preserve your confidence and sense of autonomy, minus infringement. This will require conscience effort and your part to remember, that you aren't being mean to the person by withdrawing, you are taking good care of yourself, and who knows, maybe if they are left completely alone, they might consider they have to do some self-evaluating to figure out how they managed to drive everyone away. 

Don't ever accept someone treating you badly. Jesus would never be okay with you being misused in any way, and neither should you! 

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long-suffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance: against such there is no law (Galatians 5:22)

COMPARE:

If the person you are dealing with is hateful, stirs up distress and disagreement, is impatient and impetuously aggressive, unkind and brutal, causes distrust, is arrogant, and seems to have no self-control when challenged, then you got yourself a bonafide rage-baiter, and you must deal accordingly. 

Need help? Hire me as your coach, or get some insights and confirmation from Joe Navarro's book, Dangerous Personalities. There are questionnaires in that book, and when you dive in, you will come up and out with a new lease on life, and maybe even a plan of action too. 

Exclusive Clubs

Are you in the club yet, dear reader? 

To be a part of certain clubs, to become a member that is, certain requirements must be met. I will list a couple of exclusive clubs you may have willingly, or perhaps with some resistance, joined:

1. Parenthood

2. Death of a parent

3. Unwell child

4. Divorce

5. Death of a sibling

Perhaps you are in one or all of these clubs? I just so happen to have entered into each in the order listed above. While I did not want to be a card carrying member for clubs 2-5, I cheerfully, even with morning, afternoon, and evening sickness, joined the parenthood club!

1. I recall when I realized that I was pregnant, after trying to eat my favourite meal and it tasting like rot, and thinking, I'm going to be a MOM, yay, barf, I mean yay, gag ... is that how raw meat really smells? YUCK! Thank You God, for my new little constant companion, my travel with me everywhere I go friend. My son is now twenty-seven, and I still think of him as God's gift to me: we are very very close, and enjoy each others company. The club of parenthood is a popular one, and I recognize not all get to join it, and many ought not, but I sure am glad God gave me entrance: motherhood is one of my all time favourite enjoyments in life. 

2. I recall when my father died, a friend said to me, You are crying because you feel sorry for yourself ... Yup, yup, I sure did, feel sorry for myself. I wasn't done with my father yet. When my strong and capable manly daddy died, it made me feel weak in the knees, and had me wondering if I would ever again feel as protected, from the big bad wolves in the world. It took me a very long time to accept his being gone, with me having no access to him. My friend apologized years later, when her dear old dad died too. She and I joined yet another club, of understanding, and compassion, over our mutual parental loss. 

3. The unwell child club is a horrid one to be dragged into. If you have been a member of the unwell child club, whether he or she was a tyke, toddler, or old enough to shave either legs or face or both (that's a little joke, dear reader ... some females have a too much facial hair and need some help ridding themselves of it), then you know how terrifying it can feel to be of no assistance, and suffer the helpless feeling of ineptitude. When my son was seriously ill, I relied on this snippet from scripture: 

However this kind goeth not out but by prayer and fasting (Matthew 17:21)

I relied on God's will when mine could do nothing to make my son well. I prayed and prayed some more. Where do you go, and what do you do, dear one, when you have nothing to offer the sick of body, of mind, of soul? Do you know someone that you simply cannot help? God has the answers to all of your troubles, and He loves your son or daughter far more than you can fathom, far more than you are capable of. Go to God for solace, comfort, and hope for healing. My son is well, sound, and healed in every way, and I give God the glory for this turn around. While I never want to be an active member in this club again, I know the Great Physician, and trust in His Sovereign will: some things, are beyond my control and reach, and the power of healing is one of them. 

4. Divorce is one of those clubs that millions have joined. It is the kind of club that can make a person feel vulnerable, endangered, susceptible, suspicious, lonely, self-conscious and self-doubting. I recall wondering while in the grocery store, Does everyone know I am all alone? Can they see that I am single? Eeck, do they know my husband left me? 

People leave each other all the time, and often the leaving shows up in teeny tiny almost invisible ways, or grotesque and ugly obvious displays, but the departing invariably has signs and symptoms that can be detected after the departure. I ain't mad, dear reader. My former husband and I did perhaps the best we could, considering our differences of opinion on what matters in life; but the divorce club, is an ugly one, because of the havoc it wreaks in families. I am divorced, but not damaged, and I attribute my well being to the understanding that God works wonders in our changed and sometimes challenging situations. My home became a sanctuary in which my son healed ... I can't say I like this club, but it is better than the alternative, of one or both partners being miserable in marriage. I don't believe in divorce, but then again, I already said, I joined against my will.  

5. The last club to be discussed here, is the death of a sibling. I joined only last week, and it is absolutely loathsome. It is one of the worst ever experiences of my existence, because my older sister proceeded me in life, and now in death, and the gap in-between is so very painful to face. How do I do it, dear one? How do I think of her and not call, or text, send a bitmoji, or meme, or make shopping or gardening plans, how, I ask you, HOW? 

I want her back, and just like my dad, I am not done with her. I couldn't hold her here, she slipped away, and what is a gal to do with this sadness, this sorrow, this heartbreak? She was an utter goofball. How do I find THAT again? She was one of a kind, a living breathing Disney character, and while I type I chuckle and cry at the very same time because I cannot comprehend, the here today laughter and the gone tomorrow grief. They are incompatible in my head and heart. If you are in this club, dear dear reader, I am so sorry for you, I am so sad for you. What can we possibly say to one another, or do for one another, to console?

I hate platitudes, they make my skin crawl. I hate the, You will see her again, Rest in peace, She is in a better place nonsense. No one that knows me well would ever say these empty things. God knows where she is, and He knows where each of us is going. Life is our greatest gift, and when our numbered days are gone off the calendar, we carry on, with a changed format of course. I could not reach into my sister and recharge her batteries, or have her somehow go back to factory setting. Our bodies betray us in the end, and no one can stop death from throwing its mantle upon us, closing our eyes and shutting our ears, turning off our senses and our ability to feel and give love. Dead, dear one, is dead, and there is no road back to living the way we were, so to speak, once we too, take our last breath. 

In my last piece of writing, I spoke about a strange tranquility ... my comfort comes from knowing that God knows all. Right now I anticipate a storm, and man alive, it is music to my ears to hear the thunder rolling in. The Bible says this:

Revelation 21:4

And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away. 

I pray it pours, that the heavens cry with me and for me and for everyone that misses my sister and aches to see her again. I pray that she is where I am going, but you know dear reader, while we are here and our loved ones are somewhere else, we just never know where God has placed them, until we do see them again. 

I will leave you now, and thank you as I go, for being here with me. I hope the clubs you join are lovely and by choice, but if you happen to be in any of the ones I have membership in, know that this too shall pass, or at least, the edgy pain will diminish. I am glad, I tell you, glad that I am missing my sister ... it speaks volumes of the relationship we managed to cultivate as siblings: if you have siblings, you know how hard becoming friends can be! 

Antonella was my friend, and I miss her. She loved dogs, sometimes more than people. I have included a picture of her with my little dog Dot, who died around this time last year ... 

Strange Tranquility

I am experiencing a strange tranquility that does not match circumstances. I have asked God to please help me understand this dichotomy, and perhaps in my writing, and sharing with you, some light will shine onto this quandary, illuminating my limited comprehension. 

My sister died last week. It was just last week ... how can it be that on July 8th, she left this world, and it is already July 17th? I feel the fade, dear reader, the space of time that has passed is erasing her touch, her scent, her effervescent lively presence, in this physical realm. There is evidence of her existence everywhere I look, and her personality was so very large that I will never forget her; alas, the fade is real and I long for her presence, not in things she left behind, but the real honest to murgatroyd her: the kooky, childlike, playful, energetic, enthusiastic, hippity-hop-go-get-'em-tigerbunny that she was. She had whimsy and could laugh until bent over, legs crossed, and that brought everyone in the room to a state of heightened hilarity, as we laughed right along with her, until tears formed out of sheer delight. 

Dear one, the fade started before she departed. Each time I saw her, I could feel the end coming and when I would leave her the sadness started, the anticipating that one day I wouldn't see her again. Ever get that feeling, the, Is this the last time sense, that months turn into weeks, then days, hours, and minutes, until finally, there is that last minute, the one that means we part company in the most hideous of ways: death is a cruel thief.  

I recognize my strange tranquility started last week, as I recall life's most recent events. I prayed a lot while my sister Antonella was still in the clay tent, the shell that housed her soul. But I wasn't the only one: believe me or not, dear one, but I could feel the saints praying on behalf of my family. I could feel the love, the warmth of an embrace without visible hands or arms. My family grieved and talked and soothed one another, we embraced often, and that was a comfort too ... and all the while, I felt something more, that inexplicable yet tangible, something more. 

I cannot help but acknowledge how very much God loves each of His creatures. He loved my sister, and dear reader, He loves you too. 

I have some of her jewelry, some of her clothes. I wore her pjs to bed two nights in a row ... the pants have Garfield all over them, with a baby pink background. These might seem childish, but do recall Garfield and some of his attitudinal ways: sometimes cartoon characters make fun of life and relationships in ways we cannot, because someone might get their nose out of joint if we were to be THAT HONEST! Antonella could be catitudinal, and that was part of her charm.

Antonella, adieu, my sweet sister, you will be missed beyond measure.

Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur 

Soft kitty, warm kitty, purr purr purr

 I love you deeply, and I'm glad God gave you to me as my big sister. 

Dear reader, if you do not have a relationship with the Saviour of the world, now is the time to get acquainted. We do not know the when, where, or how, of pending death, while knowing that it WILL, happen our day sooner or later. My comfort is found in God's wisdom, and I hope you go to His Word for this strange tranquility too, as the perfect supply of a peace that truly does, surpass all understanding. God's righteous providence is incomparable. 

Psalm 23

The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters. He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Yea, thou I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the LORD for ever.  

Thought Sparks a Flyin"

The best company is sparky company!

You would think, dear reader, that most people would prefer fun over fury, and spunkiness over solemnity, but no, oh no, the very serious and dour minded, have a way of turning the tables on the playful, killing spontaneity by attempting to suffocate it with dreary moods and looks. 

You may be surprised to learn there have been advances in medicine, with new diagnoses to describe some uncommon, and alternatively, some very evident and typical maladies, that are showing up in the populace these days. Let us see what Some People are now suffering from:

Some People suffer from a rarely diagnosed case of trout mouth: defined as a permanent turndown at the corners of their top and bottom lips, while pursed together. Every once in an infrequent while, you may be able to detect long hair like protrusions coming from these mouth corners. NOTE: this may or may not be a part of your imagination, and if you insist that you can see the hairs, good for you, you are probably sparky company! 

Some People suffer from another type of disease, and this one is more common and more readily identifiable, know as dead eyes, or blank stare syndrome; look for these symptoms: no recognition of understanding when you are sharing a concept or idea with them; blinking, with the eyelids used as wipers, and still nothin', no shine, no glow, no sign of life. Dead eyes do not give off light or warmth, and they may as well be glass without shine. If you feel the urge to clap clap clap to wake the person up, or shake them to see if there is anyone in there, then congratulations, you are probably, sparky company! NOTE: You may want to just walk away, before the deadness starts to dull your ability to be spark spark sparky. 

Some People are now suffering from I forget disorder, otherwise known as I am innocent if I say so sickness. Here is what to look for when you suspect someone has this condition: 

1. They remember, but don't want to admit it

2. They forget, and refuse to be updated

3. They just don't care, and think you shouldn't either

4. They want you to shut up, get off their back, and leave them alone

5. They attack what you say, what you do, and not so subtly suggest that you are the one that has lost your ever loving mind, and that you have no integrity, so why don't you just bugger off?

If you have encountered someone that falls into this category of mental, psychological and emotional ineptitude, and you are scratching your head in wonder at their utter disregard for facts and truth, then Sparky, you can consider yourself bright eyed, bushy tailed, fun loving, playful, and ready for other very good company. 

You know, Sparky, I am inviting you to take a close look at the people you have in your life. When you talk with them, is there a wonderful sharing, a back and forth, where they are responding to what you have said, asking you questions, and then spit and polishing your thoughts with you so that when you part ways, you feel as though the person you are leaving, really loves and appreciates you? 

And do you, Sparky, do the very same for and with them, so that they know how valuable you are to them? 

The art of communication truly is a two way street. Eyes and ears must be attuned to other, and responses must match and synergize in order for there to be that feeling of thought sparks flyin', with resultant life fires being lit that motivate, edify, encourage, ignite. I know you know that great feeling after you have spent time with a marvellous human being that makes you feel like life is good and alternatively, I understand that you have had the exact opposite experience, where you felt drained and diminished after some really awful company. 

Know this, you get to choose who you spend time with, and there must not be that yucky feeling of obligation. Understand this too, that in order to have good company, you must be good company. AND: If you need some help learning the art of communication, hire me, as your life coach. 

I am very good at what I do and I want you to live a sparks a flyin' life, dear one. Don't you want this too?

1 Thessalonians 5:11

Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify one another, even as also ye do.

I | AM Celine Dion

Last night I finished what I started: I watched the second half of a documentary about the suffering Celine Dion is experiencing, and how grievous it is for her to lose her sense of self, her identity as a star performer, using her "instrument" to entertain hundreds of thousands of adoring fans. 

Celine is downcast and in the throes of a death grip. She suffers from stiff person syndrome, and dear reader, I just have to say, that the strangeness of diagnoses catches me off guard these days. Unfortunately, Dion has been peddling the death of innocence for children for quite some time, and I must quote scripture here, as a reminder that God does not take kindly toward anyone that interferes with little ones:

And whoso shall receive one such little child in my name receiveth me. But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea. Woe unto the world because of offences! for it must needs be that offences come; but woe to that man by whom the offence cometh! (Matthew 18:5-7)

I have never been a fan of being a fan of anyone. I don't glorify man, or put anyone on a pedestal. I have never been fond of Celine Dion, and, after watching her in the documentary, I can say I admire her devotion to her craft, her standards of excellence, and her ability to deliver outstanding performances that had followers coming back for more. I feel deeply sorry for her suffering, and while I admire her candour, I do not like the display she is making of being very ill, and here is why. 

People like Celine love the limelight, and believe their fans want explanations so that they can understand why the super star is no longer available to make their lives brighter. The "star" makes the mistake of believing that others are devastated when they must withdraw from centre stage, no longer giving bits of joy and delight to the people that spend insane amounts of money to see a show, a display, hear a song and watch someone parade across the stage as though they own it, it was made for them, and they will always be up there, looking down, as fans look with adoring eyes, upward. Celine reminds me of Farrah Faucet, wanting her death recorded and then watched. They want to be seen, and heard, and they don't want to be forgotten: what they do not realize, is that we are all, fading flowers:

The grass withereth, the flower fadeth: but the word of our God shall stand for ever (Isaiah 40:8)

Death is not the final act, where the curtain goes down, everyone applauds, and says, Well done, Celine, Farrah, Cher, Madonna, Dolly. No no, death is the finale of life on earth, and is a private matter: those that fear God, spend their last moments longing to leave this world and all its cares and woes, to go and be in His eternal Presence, as opposed to clutching and clawing at what made us feel grand and important while walking the earth. We know we are neither grand, nor important: We know Who is though. 

The stars cling with clenched hands, to what they had, to what they cannot let go of, but before they go, while at the height of their grandeur, they do some damage, and Celine did exactly that, with her gender neutral clothing line, that blends girls and boys into a confused state of being, along with sending death messages to their sweet little minds, with sculls decorating the clothes they wear. For a very feminine woman that has a warehouse full of all her performance clothing, along with an insanely huge wall of shoes that has a wall of shoes behind that, in her home, she sure was okay with suggesting a cross over for others, and it suited her fine to make money from selling what is reprehensible to God. 

I watched Celine experience the terror of her body betraying her during the documentary. She has a crew of masked men surrounding her, at the ready to administer medication and care when she takes a turn for the worse, with body spasms and seizures. She is dependant upon paid staffers, who call her Boss, for her safety when she becomes a stiffened body, disabled from self-control and autonomous movement. She commands attention with unorchestrated, unplanned, unpleasant looking and sounding jerks, contractions, and moaning. I don't know about you, dear reader, but when I am unwell, the last thing I want is to be on display: forgive me for being harsh, but it would appear, that any attention, is good attention, when a person hungers and thirsts for it as though it is the food and drink they need to survive.

I feel sorry for Celine, because I am confident she got poisoned just like so many other celebrities, and is suffering the after effects from being injected: the show must go on, is the mantra, and all the super stars freely use this line, and many willingly signed up to get tested and shot, wear masks, and follow protocols to maintain their personal status quo. Also, these people are afraid, literally afraid of death. Yikes, that is a dangerous state of mind and heart, considering the fact that death follows closely and immediately, on the heels of life! NOTE: many a celebrity tapped into their ability to influence their fans by pushing c@vid shots, using their own money to promote injections: thanks for nothing do-badders. While I do not like seeing anyone suffer, this isn't the main reason I feel sorry for her. Mostly, I feel sorry for Dion because she used her God given gifts without thanking Him and graciously accepting, while the camera was turned her way, that her time on stage had come to a close; that she no longer had the use of her "instrument" to perform for the crowds, and that she is very very sick, and by His grace, she has time to reconcile her past with her eternity. In other words, she hasn't repented of her sins, and the sand in her hour glass is falling fast. 

Celine is dying, just like the rest of us, while trying to swing back in time and recapture the brass ring she has lost her grip on. And not a once do we hear her say she is sorry for creating a clothing line that attempts to demonically corrupt children. She played a key role in colluding with the devil to enact his wicked plan of destroying innocent lives, and yet there does not seem to be a semblance of regret or remorse. She has sons of her own... what is her legacy? I pray her children know God, the Creator of heaven and earth, and all things in-between.  

And I pray for Celine Dion too. For her to grieve loss, accept it, and then come to terms with her circumstances. I pray her ears are open while her throat remains closed, so that she hears God's voice, His corrective instructions, and heeds without speaking or singing a word. She needs to stop reading sheet music, and start reading The Bible, and I pray she does, for the sake of her own soul, for the sake of the masked men that frequent the spaces she moves in, and more importantly, for the sake of the souls of her sons, the blessings God gave her to raise as His children, not hers. 

With whatever influence Celine Dion has left, I pray she witnesses to the saving grace of Jesus Christ, that He died for her sins, rose from the grave to prove resurrection is something to look forward to, and that to live is Christ, and to die is gain, for all that place their trust in Him, and Him alone. It isn't too late. While there is breath, there is hope. 

And I hope, for many. 

Hey Celine, look what The Bible says about singing:

Zephaniah 3:17

The Lord thy God in the midst of thee is mighty; he will save, he will rejoice over thee with joy; he will rest in his love, he will joy over thee with singing.

PS: Pushing people toward sharp objects makes you culpable