Than, Now & Yet to Be

If I could turn back time…Take me to your great unknown. These juxtaposed desires live inside of me, vying for my attention. There has been an unspoken whisper in my heart. I want to know Gods plan. I am torn between blindly trusting Him with my everything and hoping that if He chooses and I verbalize my desire, He will reveal to me what is to come. Under the desire and in the asking, I hope for the confidence He will provide, that all is well and going perfectly, according to His plan. There is another bedrock belief that is engrained in my faith and it is this: He wins, He concurs, He makes good on all of His promises. Clearly, I want Him to make me, a personal promise.

I am not a sentimental person, nor do I indulge in writing about particular calendar days but this New Years Eve day feels a little different. I am caught between the desire to turn back time AND have God take me to His great unknown. The past has an innocent appeal, the present has a knowing that many things are out of place, shuffled and unfathomable with the future holding a promise of…what? If God could give me a hint, give us a hint of what the future will be, would it bring relief, joy, sadness, madness? The story of Gideon putting out fleeces and asking for proof that God really was talking to Him and directing him comes to mind. Than, and then, thankfully, I am reminded that Gideon lived long before Christ dwelled among us in human form. We test our faith each time we ask God to prove His will 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 "Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." Be joyful always? My goodness, this seems like an awfully tall order when I, when you, are in the throws of impassioned fear and worry, does it not? Pray continually? Is this a fruitless effort if I don't know the outcome? I mean, what is the point Dear Reader, to pray and not be assured how "it" will turn out? Give thanks, give THANKS? How the heck are we supposed to do THIS when mired in the muck of yucky circumstances-does God even know how much He asks of us in this one request? So I, so you, are to be these things in the not knowing; joyful, prayerful, thankful…in all circumstances? I have to laugh at what I just wrote. In God's sweetness, He has given us written guidance, a weak human manual of what to do in times of sorrow, confusion, despair, insecurity, the not knowing. He wants us to pray joyfully in all circumstances because it is His will through Christ Jesus. This, Dear One, is precisely what Christ did in the worst possible circumstances and He knew the outcome. He knew what was to come because He trusted in His Fathers will. Jesus modelled for us what it looks like to suffer and still believe that God wins, concurs and makes good on His promises. I think I have the answer to my now verbalized heart desire. I will trust in Him and this will be more than enough as I pass from the year that was into the year that shall be. What about you Dear Reader? Do you dare to ask for what you want and trust His will for you, come what may?