How It Was

Do you remember how it was?

It was an every other and sometimes every day event. Siri, call ________. When you picked up, I would playfully ask, Who is it?, even though I was the one that rang you... 

A short second of silence, and then laughter... I knew you, you knew me, and there wasn't anything that could keep us apart, despite the hundreds of kilometres of road between us: those evaporated, didn't they? when we shared our troubles, our concerns, our sadness, triumphs, and our joy too. An hour on the phone with you disappeared in a brilliant flash and I always looked forward to next... Hello, Who is it?

Now don't you dare think that our time apart has been easy for me. It hasn't been. When I think of you, it is with fondness. When I cast my line into the past, my hook retrieves memories of when you were there for me, loving me through the tough stuff, and I hope, you felt the same about me? Was I as good to you as you were to me?

The Captain wrote a song, perhaps you recall it. Love, love will keep us together, think of me babe whenever... 

Ahhh, if only love kept us together. If only love, godly love, could have gorilla glued us inseparable. Do you wish it had? I want you to know that if you would have let me, I would never have left your side: we would be like siamese twins, you and me, me and you... 

Crow bars are terrible things when applied to two who relate so well, wedging them asunder, prying them apart. It was invisible, wasn't it, the insidious apparition that inserted itself between us... we didn't see or hear its approach and hadn't a clue what damage it would do. Love, we loved one another and spoke these words often, wrote them repeatedly, committed to the concept. 

I could tell you that I miss you, but I don't. I had to give up missing you, because I knew the feeling wouldn't fade unless I gave it permission to. It had to go... have you given up missing me too?

The love, you know that deep down forever love, it is still there... it longs for what was and sorrows for what will never be. The crow bar worked, and the space between us has grown. Time is said to heal all wounds, but I don't think this is so... what used to be is irreplaceable, and how can the hurt ever really go away? 

And so I will love you forever and ever, amen. 

I just wanted you to know.