I AM FREE

Yesterday I sat with my back to two unopenable windows in a circle of women at a coaching horse workshop. We were on chairs that sat us close to the ground in the well kept horse inn. Above and within sight appeared a sparrow and he/she remained present, flying about off and on, throughout our time in the inn. This sparrow had a perch and kept its eyes on us. While sharing, another sparrow flew into the window behind me and in a panic, flew into the window beside it.  This caused a stir in us and I was half way out of my seat to rescue the small bird when calmly, in a soothing voice, our leader Susan Morel told us to all take a deep breathe, to calm ourselves and stay peace filled. She stated "nature takes care of itself". We waited, hopeful, and the small bird settled and went calm. As we sat in peaceful silenced, another swallow flew close to the windowed bird and chirped encourement to follow him, away from the window and out to open space. The bird did not follow. Within seconds, the bird that had been watching us on its perch, chirped loudly, commandingly, seemingly calling the young trapped bird to follow the voice to freedom.  He still did not come away from the window. Finally, a fellow sparrow, a loving bird of feather, flew to the window and the message was received, come follow me, I know the way out and if you trust me, you will be free...he followed.  One of the brilliant assistants, Lisa, stated "interfering can do more harm than good". Message received oh wise and wonderful sparrow. All of Gods creatures are naturally creative resourceful and whole~if this is true, and it clearly is, in the animal kingdom, how much more so with human beings, created in Gods own image?  The sparrow in its purity does not question it's condition, it's inalienable right to freedom, it does not question it's own resourcefulness and creativity.  Lessons in freedom are waiting for us, a little bird told me so.  I AM FREE.

Taffy

I am free to be a rebel to help others be free. I learned this from a horse. Yes, you read that correctly, from a horse. 

Today was day two of Natures Horse. During this three day workshop, horses pick the humans they want to work with by sensing and feeling the persons energy. From there, the humans learn to listen, and look for signs from their horse partner, when they are stuck, when there is an epiphany, and when there is an ahh moment of, "I see and now I know."

 

My horse is a lot like me. He is a pony named Taffy, and he thinks he is a big horse. He is strong and can take a lot of pressure. He is sure footed and doesn't take any guff from larger horses. He goes along, not to get along, but when he feels it is the right choice. He is a bullshit detector, and when I didn't stay strong and convicted in the Truth, he turned away from me and would not make eye contact, as if to say, "That's horse-shit, and you know it."

  

Taffy taught me that I can wait, and that if I stay, the powerful learning a reward well worth the wait. I also learned I don't have to work ~ I don't mean this in the traditional employment sense of the word. I mean that relationship is a forward and back, a step into and step back with each partner in the dance, always having the freedom to chose. 

At one point in my stall time with Taffy, there was a stand off, where I could not connect with him and he would not make eye contact. This is when the workshop leader stepped in and began coaching me, after asking what I thought was going on. She suggested I speak to Taffy and ask for help. I sat on the floor in the stall and spoke to Taffy, pouring out my desire to be free, without constraint, and untethered by fear. Taffy then turned to me, looking directly at me, nodding his agreement. He then stretched his front legs toward me, hide end up in the air, and next, came near. 

I recall that moment as one of the most extraordinary experiences of complete acceptance, without trying to prove myself, my worth, or my right to be me without explanation or excuse. A horse heard my need to be free and as a free creature, he acknowledged me, reassured me, let me know I am on my way, to being a free rebel that helps others to freedom. 

Much love to more horsey soulmate, Taffy.

Life Savers

The dark side of the sun.  This is my thought as I contemplate the dark and bright of me. Listening to music can make me laugh, new song, cry, new song, dance, new song fall into despair.  Of course this is the point of music, feeling and being moved and how amazing for artists when this is the response they have to their artistry.  I am empathic and humans make me feel and sometimes the emotions are so overwhelming that they consume me.  Left to my own devices, I am a rather joyful person and the impact I have on others is energizing. When I sense, hear, see turmoil, I become super hero saviour, Linda to the rescue, and I fight hard for others to stand up for themselves, not be beaten down, fight for their right, to party...I mean really, their right to joy and life abundant, unencumbered...free from human tethers around their necks.  Rescue is anti coaching, it is NOT seeing others as naturally creative resourceful and whole and this is a tenant I work toward integrating as a powerful coach who helps others see and feel and live their own powerful lives of choice.  I thanked my great new friend Amy Day today, for loving me after my trying to rescue her when she wasn't even drowning!  We laughed at the vision that came to her: "I had an image of you shoving a life vest on me while I was enjoying a swim".  Next time I will use Life Savers, the only candy with the hole in the middle. Helping and serving means listening and hearing, not fixing...oh coaching, how I do love thee and all the friends I have made through you.  This is for you hoppy, Amy Day, for the laughter and the learning, xo

Choice

Choice is a crazy concept when it is first introduced to someone, at least it was when I first got introduced.  Hello Linda, my name is Choice~let me tell you a little bit about myself. I travel everywhere you do, I am your constant companion.  Without you knowing me, you have chosen to see the world a certain way, approach people and situations in certain ways and you have chosen to currently have this conversation, with me, which is great, because now that you know I exist, we can get real, down to the nitty gritty so to speak.  Patterns, I have learned, are chosen. It doesn't feel that way because when in one, a person may feel that no options are avaibable and perhaps what was chosen many moons or people years ago, was a good choice at the time and no longer makes sense in the now.  When introduced or shall I say, confronted, with the truth that what is happening in a life has been a choice, albeit a sleepy choice, the person has the opportunity to access what kept them in the pattern in the first place AND what they want in the present and in the future. The harsh reality is that no one can hold another in a pattern and no one can break a pattern for another, it must be a choice, based on what is valuable, good, right and true, with integrity. Compromising self for the comfort of a familiar habit just doesn't cut it when Choice is introduced.  What will you choose today?

Welcome to Fantasy Island

Welcome to Fantasy Island. I used to love this show as a kid and thanks to Netflix, I can enjoy it again in a completely new and different way.  The concept is simple~guests pay $50 000 for an experience and the host of Fantasy Island ensures that all elements are in place to capture the experience and have the guest feel, that's right feel.  I was going to add more to this and as I write, I realize that the main point is exactly this, feeling. The guests are stuck on a thought, a certain something that niggles at them that asks for resolution, completion, forward movement...sounds a lot like coaching to me.  I was delighted as I watched a few episodes and realized that Mr. Roarke is the quintessential Co-Active Coach. He listens to his clients requests, orders environments and people into place, admittedly hired actors to play roles in the fantasies, and he holds guests to the agenda they paid for. Within the living of the fantasy, there are points during which quests come up against unpleasant truths about themselves and others and this is where epiphanies happen or, don't happen, the choice is always up to the guest. Mr. Roarke remains detached when guests suggest they do not like what is happening and he reminds them that he is not responsible for outcomes. Their safety is never at risk, as he plays crucial roles in their learning visibly and invisibly, always with the understanding that living their fantasy will not kill them.  He is charming and cut and dry, he is playfull and forthright, he IS whatever the situation calls for and remains true to his character all the while, and invites others to be true to their own values, beliefs and character during their fantasy experience.  When guests leave the island, they leave as different people than when they arrived...or not...some repeat what they have always repeated and always will...which category do you fall under?

Ted Bucklin

I met an amazing man recently who has sky blue eyes and when you look into them, you can see eternity there. His love of humanity is palpable and being in his presence is balm to the soul. I wear a bracelet that says FEARLESS and it is a reminder to me to go fearlessly forth, in Christ. While we chatted, the gentle man intensely spoke wisdom as he said something to the affect of "fear is natural, being undaunted by it is the key"...these may not be the exact words, they are, however, my take away sentiment.  We are tested and tried, with fear as the ever present propagated monster of the mind, attempting to weaken its victims into apathy and nervous insecurity~it is the life sucking demon that lies and attempts to steal majesty from humans, humans created in Gods own image.  My new friend knows the game and refuses to play by fears rules and is "undaunted" by its ploys and manipulations. He is free and speaks freedom into others when he sees that chains are in need of breaking...he offers the key, it is up to the individual to use it.  This is dedicated to Ted Bucklin, a lover of life and all things human, a freedom fighter for the soul.

Faith Enlivened

Today I coached co-actively with another fabulously talented coach, my Grace sister (our middle name is coincidentally the same).  The coaching was powerful and without details, I will say that the impact on the coachees was and will be, profound.  It was my first 2 coach, 2 client combo and when a friend and fellow coach asked "what was it like to really serve in this way" it came to me that it felt like a peace mission.  This made me want to weep with appreciation for the Co-Active model, the faith in fellow man and Ubuntu "a quality that includes the essential human virtues; compassion and humanity".  Me winning means someone else has to lose, sacrifice, not get what they want or deserve for fear of asking or out of a sense that what is important to them has no value or worth, or in other words, the I am not worthy sentiment that many live with.  Coaching is about wholeness, for self and for the other.  Coaches are advocates for clients and their wholeness and the ultimate goal is the client to be advocate for themselves with self compassion and humanity (compassion and love for others) as guiding principals.  The coaching model is faith enlivened~I see its power and go forth and spread The Good News.

Love Under Seagull Wings

Falling in love again.  Do you remember a time when you looked into the eyes of another and reflected there was the soft doey eyed look of heart melting love?  Seeing the look and than having the heart translate it's meaning has a profound impact on the receiver.  Before the look, there may be angst, confusion, self deprecation and insecurity, on both sides. As safety increases in the relationship, as each person recognizes the dawning of mutual appreciation just as they are, the love starts to bud, grow, bloom.  Then there is the look~the eyes see it first, the mind says is that what I think it is and then bam, there it is, the realization that someone loves you so much that it is shining adoringly from their eyes in such a brilliant way as to blind you, make you blink in disbelieve with the accompanying unnerving feeling that this is powerful stuff, this love thing.  As coach, I have had the awe inspiring experience of speaking with my eyes and hearing with my heart during exercises where no words are spoken, eye gazing is the one and only action plan and pure love is expressed and felt.  This deep and gorgeous soul brushing leaves a lasting impression and an indelible mark on the spirit.  The love teaches love and reverberates until the receiver finally and fully gets "it" OHHHHHH, you love me, you love me and...now somehow, I love me too...to my tribe, near and far, I learned to love myself in the safety under a thousand happy flapping and cuddle in close wings~I love you Seagulls, thanks for loving me unto myself.

Time is Short

Life is short, this is the expression that comes to me as I contemplate my topic which is, what are you doing with your time?  I read a great question in the manual for the most recent course I took on Lifestyle and Wellness Coaching. The question:  Is what I am doing moving me toward or away from my wellness?  Insert different items in there like:  Is the person across from me moving me toward or away from my own wellness?  Is the situation I find myself in moving me...you get the picture here.  Stress, anxiety, knots in the stomach, an aching heart, these are symptoms, warnings of danger and potential injury.  That's not indigestion you have, it's your gut telling you hey, if you don't take care of me right now, I'm quitting, and I dare you to find someone else to take this job!  The amazing thing about the human body is it's resiliency. Thank goodness for sleep, even when it is short, because sometimes this is the only respite from YOU that your body gets.  What if your soul is screaming WHAT ABOUT ME, REMEMBER ME?  Consider your soul, the hungry unwanted forgotten relative in the corner~everyone else got to eat, play, express themselves except the sad and neglected starving soul.  Here is the flip side to the body~it can only take so much and when slow down or pay attention warnings go unheeded, stress turns into heart attack, stroke, stomach aches and you name it. In this short life, what are you choosing to do with your time?

Pride & Walls

I have been on a seek and find mission.  I have a keen awareness that I have lived my life with many a defence mechanism firmly in place, keeping me safe from potential threat to my autonomy, my God given right to choice, my me...I am also keenly aware that all those self protective pieces of armour have kept me apart, separate from others, an emotional island in many ways.  The other side of this coin is my deep desire to have others need me, lean on me for emotional support, comfort and truly inspired solutions to their lets say, issues in life. Haha, pride is so arrogant!  I know, I know that I am stating the obvious here and at the same time, the simplicity of this truth is pure delight. One of my tightly constructed red brick walls of protection has been NOT asking for help.  Stubborn pride (there's that darn word again) had me desperately searching for answers to whatever puzzling life question came my way, including in the form of in the lives of others, as though I was/I am the beacon of truth, the solution provider, the uniquely gifted answer finder. What I discovered is that in my most prideful moments, I have clung to what I believed was the answer and I have held kind souls there, with me...despite my being so off the mark as to be off the map.  This speaks to the proverbial "remove the plank in your own eye before you attempt to remove the sliver in another's".  I am grateful for gorgeous breathtaking humility, the kind that has cleared my clouded self important vision.  Help, a new word for me.  I now recognize when and how to use the word in giving, receiving and accepting when offered.  The walls, come tumbling down, yeah the walls...

Sunglasses.  Not long ago, I had three pair, ranging in purchase price from $1 to $100. Slowly but surely, each pair of sunglasses disappeared.  I looked for them, I asked family members if they had seen them and except for the dollar store pair, none could be found. They would have to do was my thought, as I packed and readied myself for a trip to California. My trip was a leadership retreat and it was sunny and cloudy in California and yet, sunglasses weren't what I needed. I needed to close my eyes, not to keep the light out but I to feel and see it from within.  Blindfolded to my own weakness, my sight has kept me in the dark. I used to look for answers, solutions, finding my own way in the maze of life, independently faltering and perhaps, out of pride and stubbornness, holding others to my solutions, rightly or wrongly, leading them to a dead end, not an exit point from whatever trap or holding pattern they were in.  Pride does come before the fall as the saying goes and I once was blind but now I see go hand in hand in this life lesson of mine. I returned from my trip yesterday and magically, my sunglasses reappeared~they were in obvious and not so obvious places.  I didn't need to look for them, my son found them without looking or trying.  What's my point?  Sometimes you can't find what you are looking for, eyes wide open...sometimes others can see clearly and following them to the answer is the solution you were looking for but were too blind to see...learning, always learning.