Gino Zinga

Disposition determines direction, and direction determines destination, in other words, attitude is everything. Don't get mad at a fish for swimming...this is a line I have repeated frequently, a little phrase I picked up from a sparky brilliant man of observation. There is a face value meaning to the fish and his unavoidable inclination to swim, he does what comes naturally and choosing to not swim would never cross a fishes mind. Deductive reason would have us all conclude that it is ridiculous to blame a fish or get mad at it, for what it does best. This sweet little metaphor is somewhat transferable to humans, is it not? How many times have you become upset with someone else's behaviour, over and over and dare I say, over again? Maybe there is one person in particular and no matter what you say or do, the response from them remains the same? Observe for yourself, who can change YOU? Who would have enough insight, power, influence and trust in YOUR life to change who YOU are? How willing are you to be course corrected, taught a thing or two, set straight or "right"? Resentment starts with disposition, one must be predisposed to being resentful in order to engage in this sentiment. I shake my head as I contemplate this thought, that no matter what I do, I cannot change you, nor do I want to. Me, on the other hand, I'm in charge of this cat, and I'm predisposed to learning, growing, seeking wisdom and knowledge wherever and whenever it presents itself. We are not fish, we are human beings, designed for greatness and with greatness as the destination, I/you, must be aware of direction and the disposition that will serve well to reach this attainable goal. I quote from my philosophical and emotionally intelligent friend "It is not my mission to change her mind". The clarity in this statement made me laugh and super excited to write, because at the heart of the matter, my friend knows what his mission is and his direction is not determined by someone else, increasing his likelihood of arriving at his predetermined destination, with few if any bunny trail travels along the way. With a grin, I tip my head with a wink and nod in your direction Gino Zinga, it is always a pleasure learning and laughing with you and from you. 

Warning

Separating the body from the soul, the great divide. I have a heavy hand today, with writing that wants to emerge as a warning to all who may read this. In a recent conversation I was asked what my relationship with my body was like. After answering this question, I was asked, what would your body say your relationship is like? That question holds me captive at this moment because I have been disregarding messages from my body for almost a life time. In the past decade, my sinuses and stopped up ears have been screaming at me HEY, PAY ATTENTION, YOU AREN'T LISTENING TO US...pardon is a part of my regular vocabulary, my ears work perfectly fine and yet, I cannot hear well because food sensitivities have caused congestion and have affected my hearing. Healing can be found in the food we eat and degenerative illness and dying can be found there too. Let's get super clear here, food is no different from our thoughts, what we think can heal or hurt us and what shows up as physical symptoms or illness are manifestations of our inner thought life. Consider anxiety, how is it that anxious fearful thoughts can cause a heart to race or hands to sweat? These are old observations, they did not originate here in this writing. Judge for yourself, how are YOU relating to this fabulous vehicle, this gorgeous you that transports your soul from here to there and back again? The missing element is Love and it always has been. We are carnal, animalistic by nature and it is by great feats of effort that we master this nature and walk toward the Divine, The Great Designer that created us for His purposes. Loving myself because I am loved, that is the only way I can be whole, healthy, of service. Jesus had nothing to prove, no ego to feed, He loved even when He was spat upon, He forgave what humans would consider unforgivable and He modelled Love that transcends all human understanding. If you are craving something, might I suggest that it is your soul making a request? Feed your soul and your body will treat you kindly, let your thoughts be fruitful and wholesome and your eyes will shine the Light of the Fire that burns within. May God be with you and bless you richly this day. 

Old Clothes

What is in your closet? Purging feels like expunging, an erasing of what holds one in a pattern, like a trapped memory or old way of being. Clothing represents who we are and how we see ourselves. My closet was full of a vestige, an old way of being me. The adage, out with the old and in with the new begins on the inside and manifests and makes itself known on the outside, a transformative experience . Clearing away what no longer suits, what no longer serves helps make room for what does suit and serve. Of course, my closet is a metaphor for what is happening in my life. I am choosing what will stay, what will go, how I want to be in the world. Old patterns, old ways of thinking and being, they have fallen away and I am new. I have what I call a special box, a place where I have stored away momentos cards from family, friends, pictures and art from my son, whole journals and heaps of paper that I had recorded my thoughts and feelings on over the years. Stored memories, in a box, on a shelf in my closet. The box could take no more and I decided it was time to look inside, to keep and purge. I am a minimalist and so for me, whatever was in the box had enough significance to have made it there in the keep pile and for some items, they had been kept for a very long time, dating back to 1989. My life, in review, and as I write, I grin. I am who I am and have been since ever I was...in other words, I haven't changed much and the things people said to me in cards over the years, I still hear them today, marking me as consistent. What's different you ask? I now believe what I hear, I don't erase when I hear kind words or compassion or encouragement when they are directed toward me. I am not alone, I don't have to prove myself and I like who I am. I like who I am and self doubt is the vestige now, the old clothes I no longer agree to wear. I am, you are, created in Gods own image...how can we resist appreciating that, pray tell?

Generosity

God, money in action. Generosity is a heart thing and it is the heart of the giver, not always the receiver, that is significantly impacted in the giving. Giving from the heart, this is the call, the request that God makes of us, His people. There is a reciprocity that happens in the giving when I know, when you know, that you are fortunate, blessed. It is out of appreciation that I too, want to give, that overwhelming feeling that somehow, someway, someone noticed me, noticed you, and wanted us to feel precious, seen, heard and the desire washes over me, over you, to share the Love...in thought, word, deed. God is the First Giver, and with eyes wide open, I receive so that I can be filled up to overflowing and than I too can give, having Generosity modelled so magnificently for me. To he who has been given much, much is expected. I want for nothing and for everything at the exact same time. I am a trusted steward with the confidence of faith and Gods whisper in my ear that the much I receive He knows will be used well, for His purposes as it passes through my hands. I give not to get, I give because I have been given much. Thank You Jon Korkidakis, for the powerful God and Money, Generosity message this morning at Village Green Community Church...one of the most generous houses of God in the city. Let us be Gods hands and feet, money in action as we Love God, Love Others and Change the World. 

Shame

Shame, the great teacher. There is an expression I learned many years ago during a coffee with a friend and it entertained me immensely. Bare bum spanking. This references what happens when someone gets their comeuppance. It is like a parent bear giving their overly rambunctious and obnoxious bear cub a swat to put him or her back in line, a lesson in good behaviour and bear etiquette. Clearly, I speak in metaphor here and yet, I have felt the sting of this type of swat back to reality, a redirect of my attention. My most recent memory of this type of stingy spanking came from a close friend. I have fond memories of the experience, despite the many tears of shame that I shed as a result of her pointing out to me some of the unilateral decisions I had many for a community I am a part of. This type of decision making is a remnant, a learned behaviour, an overcompensation for being without control and feeling like if I didn't take control, I would have no say. The spanking, it was a love swat, a wiser I know better bear giving a cub a lesson in how to. The fond memories, they are the feelings of love from her to me as she took the time to teach me, show me where I had gone astray and how I might think, say, do differently next time. My gratitude flows out freely from my eyes in tears because she loved me enough to know that I might feel some shame, some pain and that I would be made sharper, stronger for having lived through it in the long run...This is gonna hurt you more than it hurts me-I play with the wording of this old adage that parents used to use prior to spanking their children because in order to learn big lessons, sometimes its gotta hurt, especially when old patterns are needing breaking. Shame, when temporary, is a great teacher. Staying in shame is a shame, it is self pitying and victimhood and it serves no one. Learning and growing, becoming a wiser person, that is the gift that comes after the sting of a bare bum spanking. I dedicate this to you, Susan Morel, my Grace Warrior Sister, thanks for the love.

Good Company

You are the company you keep. Look around you, who do you spend time with? Listen carefully, what conversations are you hearing and having? Check out your heart, how do you feel before during and after time spent, or shared, with certain people? Tell tale signs for company gone bad: you can't wait to get away; you can't get what they said out of your head; what they said keeps coming out of YOUR mouth; you fault find, criticize and then feel guilty for it; you are on edge and the thought of seeing the person(s), talking to them, hearing their voice(s) grates on you and is a privalent thought; you wish you had said THIS, or maybe THAT, last time you were together and your fantasy life of missed opportunities grows larger by the day. Let's go in the opposite direction. After spending time with friends, you feel invigorated, alive and your time with them was far too short and when oh when do you get to be together again? There is a feeling of having been elevated, expanded, challenged and fertized for new growth. Oh, we have all been here, and there, haven't we? I always brag that I have excellent taste and with a smug grin, I think I am committed to believing this for the rest of my life. I know the difference, YOU know the difference between what is life sucking and slow death causing in relationships and what is life building, with fire and water and earth and air, lungs filling with oxygenated affirmations of what is good and pure, right and true. The risk we take when exposed to poison is inhaling it and then exhaling onto the next person we meet. Check for yourself, whatever comes out of your mouth usually comes from what you have most recently been exposed to...it's worth the awareness, the only way change is possible. I get to enjoy my today, I choose my company and I feel great! Thanks for the fab company last night and today Korean & Jeff Whitney, xo

Presence

One hand, one gentle hand remains on me at all times. Have you ever walked through a crowd and had your hands on your child's shoulders, gently steering them, a from behind guide maintaining contact and ensuring that while moving, you stay together? Often in a crowd, there is jostling and an arm can get knocked, a hand inadvertently slipping away from a shoulder with a slight panicy feeling when contact is broken and then a quick restore of two hands or perhaps, one hand becomes enough, with the touch alternating between firm and light, depending on the crowd patterns, necessity dictating touch intensity. When my child was perhaps four, my husband and I had taken him to an outdoor fun festival. The boy had gone into a tent and while I saw him go in, there was some confusion upon his exit and I vividly recall his face, dissolving into panicked tears when he couldn't see me at the exit and there were strange people milling about and none of them looked familiar to him. He has always been excellent at naming what he feels and he said something along the lines of "you weren't waiting for me". I shake my head at the memory because it still makes me sad for him to have been so frightened and to feel so abandoned. Isn't that how we feel sometimes, abandoned and alone, forgot or perhaps misplaced? In Deuteronomy 31:8 it says: It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; He will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed. His is the hand on my shoulder, on my heart, ever present, reminding me that I have Him as guide and that I need not fear or be dismayed. May you feel His hand on you today and may your loneliness dissolve in His presence.