The Beginning of Evil

"The beginning of evil is the absence of God, sin cannot be in His presence". These are the wise words spoken by my friend Jason Palm. These words ring so true because as feeling beings, sensitive to our environment and the humans we share time as space with, we know, we just plain old know when evil lurks and given the right circumstances, we fall in line with the devils script and cues for behaviour or more aptly put, cues for reaction. Look at Ephesians 6:12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the authorities, against the powers of the dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. I love the arguments against Gods existence, they entertain me. I remember watching my girlfriends son for her after school many years ago. He was just a little boy and he killed a rather large ant, squishing it under foot. I said "you killed the ant", letting him know that he had taken a life and his response was "no I didn't no I didn't, look"...he poured water on the ant in an attempt to revive it, bring it back to its former hard working search the world for food self. We all know how that turned out. The ant lay lifeless, without spirit. Whatever enlivened the ant prior to the shoe assault was now missing in action, meaning the body remained, action was no longer possible. Dead is dead and what this really means is lifeless. Yes, here I equate life with spirit, and why not? So let us elevate our thinking and accept that something within us moves us, gives us life force, energy, spirit. A dictionary definition of spirit is the non-physical part of a person, which is the seat of emotions and character; the soul. If spirit moves us, and in my argument, it does, and it is the "seat of emotions and character", it, spirit that is, can express itself. Deny God, deny spirit and my argument falls flat. If you are grimacing at my argument, move along now, because the rest of it will not make sense to you either. The universal theme of good verses evil moves us constantly and sells many a movie ticket and novel of intrigue. It is the stuff of greatness and extreme pain, undeniably evident, just turn on the news. Kindness, mercy, love, forgiveness, these are the admirable traits of the spirit. Avarice, hate, jealousy, rage, these are the grimy slimy admonish able traits of the spirit. We are, as humans, capable of all of these and many more. What my friend Jason pointed to in his wise statement is that evil exists and is separate from God and when we indulge in one set of traits over the other, we invite Gods presence or perhaps He allows us in His, working through us, or we drive Him far and fast away from us, repelled by our evil indulgence. The devil made me do it...I laugh at this because there appears to be a smidge of truth in the joke and while accountability is our burden and gift in life, unseen forces are pressing in on all sides making them palpable and real. In my argument, God is Good and cannot be present when evil and the devil play human puppet show games. Sensing evil and chosing to disengage, detangle takes some practice and with Gods help, the spirit is capable of being set free. With the same mouth, I can speak love and hate, all in the same sentence. With these hands, I can calm and soothe, or tightly grip in a strangle hold. Free will gives me choice and God? He knows what we, what you and I are capable of. He is the incomparable God Almighty and He alone can judge the living and the dead. In the words of Jesus The Christ "Why do you call me good?" Jesus replied. "No one is good except God alone." Let's not make the mistake of believing otherwise. 

Storm

Is a storm coming your way?

Notification of an advanced nature
A crackle of thunder, a flash of lightening, off in the distance and yet close enough to stir warning signals, pre storm alerts of what might be rolling this way. A glimpse, a glance, an unbidden thought yet to be captured and understood, these have their own build in notification of an advanced nature, they are parts of a story yet to be told, of perhaps a storm yet to roll in.

Soulful sinew clawed and marked
Nature has its own rules. Wind can whip and tear apart with unseen hands, and brute force, limbs of magnificent girth, from ancient deeply rooted, and sweep the sky trees. Humans have the same force of nature capacities, with thoughts and words ripping and shredding the soul of another invisibly, soulful sinew clawed and marked. Inside a storm, there is intensity and committed passion. The storm does not hold back, it lets loose and lays bare, all that attempts to stand before it, it taunts, Try to stand, try to resist me, you haven't a chance. 

Taking shelter is a naturally protective urge, and yet there too, the wind can blow and claw, finding the hidden. A whisper of wind can turn into gale force, with sometimes little to no warning. Nature does not consult with man, it is not made to explain.

Looking for shelter, weathering the storm alone
Now let's look at the hissing whisper of doubt, lies that stir up a soul to question and distrust, ultimately misleading two or more so that each look for shelter separately, weathering the storm alone. The aftermath of storms great and minor, can look about the same or completely different. Clean up may or may not be required and the sun, well it does what it has always done, it comes out and with its rays, says today I dawn anew. 

Coming out of hiding into the light, destruction can look like a well needed pruning, and an opportunity for much needed new growth and renewal. Storms serve a purpose, and we all must weather the storms of this life, which brings me to:

And when he was entered into a ship, his disciples followed him. And, behold, there arose a great tempest in the sea, insomuch that the ship was covered with the waves: but he was asleep.  And his disciples came to him, and awoke him, saying, Lord, save us: we perish. And he saith unto them, Why are ye fearful, O ye of little faith? Then he arose, and rebuked the winds and the sea; and there was a great calm. But the men marvelled, saying, What manner of man is this, that even the winds and the sea obey him! (Matthew 8:23-27)

A storm can be a "direct and violent assault on a stronghold". I leave you to ponder what this means in your life.

Confidence & Competence

Confidence & Competence. One without the other makes for a weak link in personality presentation. Insecurities can wreak havoc and when they are closely examined, they are like a horde of broken and war torn soldiers, waiting for marching orders and pushed by the spears of fear. The voices say things like: what makes you think you are good enough; who cares what you think; no one will listen to you; you have it good, can't you just appreciate what you have; why bother, it won't make a difference anyway; and my personal favourite..."it's" not worth the effort. How is it that an outside observer can see me/you in all my/your glory, glowing halo and all, and all I/you can see is tarnish, the pitina of time dulling the shine? I think of competence, the capabilities that are acquired with practice and how confidence often times needs to catch up, be in evidence too. You want a point from all this ruminating? What purpose does it serve for me, for you, to be competent and lack confidence? The impact of a powerful perhaps life changing message can be lost in the shuffle when the emotional deck is stacked with insecurity. It is like armed emotional robbery, the messengers tongue is tied in knots, held hostage by some unseen bandant. I recall English class in high school~our task was to memorize and recite a poem to our classmates. My turn came and I stood, unable to utter a word. I can still see the discomfort of my classmates, they too, felt helpless and the pity on their faces was uncomfortable and somehow a comfort all wrapped up in one. They WANTED me to succeed, they WANTED me to deliver...we ALL would have felt better off if I had just spoken, delivered my four lines (the bare minimum for the assignment). I could not enjoy my assignment or anyone else's because I was absorbed with my own lack, my confidence was in my belief I should not be front and centre, that I could, should, hide from public display. Here I am, laid bare, soul exposed...does my message speak to you? What does it say? I am confident in my competence for message delivery and it is in writing that I am truly free. What do you need to be set free from the bondage of tongue, pen fear captivity? Speak, write, who knows what heart needs your words today? One love, one life, all yours to claim. 

Intensity

Intensity matched and love made stronger...yesterday I was invited to fully express my emotions with a close friend. The emotions were anger, fueled by hurt, and my anger is frightening to me. I have a laser sharp tongue and what I speak in blind anger, others recall long afterward. Generally, I control myself, withdraw as a form of protection, preservation for the other~my fear is that I will wound them or, to be more honest, my fear is that they cannot handle my intensity and that they will pout, hold a grudge, be unable to accept at least a part of the responsibility for the fray in our relationship, leaving me holding the reigns, as though I am the one accountable for the breach in trust. Trust is strange, isn't it? I mean isn't relationship predicated, declared in trustworthiness? I think of my wedding vows and the man I hold hands with in public, fight with and love in private and I am grateful for it all. The current challenge for me is to love others even when I'm red hot mad, even when I want to scream at them and perhaps trust them enough with my truth, my intensity. They can see it anyway, I cannot hide...I am what is none as OBVIOUS! I laugh at this reality and it saddens me at the same time because without expression of inner workings, misunderstanding is inevitable. While I hold my tongue, bite back irritation, it builds and bubbles, surfacing acid like and lava pours out, scathing. What I didn't want to happen, injury to other, happens. Blink...what I haven't been taught is conflict with resolution. I mean this sounds rediculous because of course I have had conflict and resolved it. What I mean is I have been taught avoidance by example, until yesterday. My friend is intense too (I laugh as I write this). She has a temper too (thank God). She is sensitive too (sweet understanding). And we fought, then we were silent, then one or the other of us offered peace in quiet words, then we fought some more and as she says, it got messy and we both stayed to clean up the mess. I know she is not holding a grudge, using my words as weapons against me, holding our friendship hostage with hurt feelings. I know she knows my heart, that my intentions are never to hurt another and she loves me more than enough to invite my intensity, the full expression of my dark and ultimately Light feelings. What next? I mean really, what is next? Let's be honest, we all have some work to do and it is in the realm of human relations. What are you willing to fight for? When intensity is present, will you stay and love, for the sake of you and the other across from you? How honest are you willing to be with yourself and those with whom you share your life? Grace is the unmerited favour of God...sometimes we give it and more often than not, we get it, without ever noticing. Today is your day~you get to be obvious and chose to invite someone into the healing process of conflict for the sake of relational resolution. This is dedicated to my Grace sister, thanks for the gloves off fight and hardy hug that followed, I love you more now than ever before. 

Forgiveness

Forgiveness is an interesting concept closely associated with spirituality. The soul grieves, aches when it feels the sting of judgement and betrayal. The body sends messages of this painful throbbing with shortness of breathe, tight chest as though a hand clenches the heart. Perhaps there is a sinking feeling in the pit of the stomach? Racing, the mind searches for understanding, explanation, some form of relief and solution from what the soul shutters from acknowledging, unwilling to face the horror of truth. Some truths are so cruel, so darkened with basement of the soul horrors that to face them feels like certain death. Feeling sensitive? Appalled perhaps by those who lie, use others for their own gain, hurt YOU because they couldn't see past themselves? Grievous, we must grieve us. Yes, grieving is a must, an essential.

The epidermis is the bodies shield, protector from outside foreign entities that can threaten life. When penetrated by a spear, a wound opens the body to a microscopic world of invaders~without medical care, the invaders are capable of take over and can cause severe perhaps life threatening damage. The body is a natural fighter, designed for healing, for recovery from attack AND it must get what it needs in the form of care for restoration. So too the soul, when under attack, becomes resilient in self preservation efforts AND deserves care, healing balm and medicinal spiritual salve. Restoration starts with acknowledging injury, grieving the pain, and closing the wound...I do not dare simplify forgiveness. I cannot and will not make it an easy effortless you can do it three step process. I can leave aside my human incomplete understanding and turn to The Authority and quote Ephesians 4:32 "Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." If you have felt the sting of hurt or worse yet, the mortifying of your soul through rejection, being ignored, maligned and or misunderstood, you deserve some tender loving care, you deserve healing. Forgiveness is heroic, it is other worldly, it is, of God. An adaptation from an old Shakespearian quote goes like this: "To err is human, to repent divine, to persist, devilish", Benjamin Franklin. Forgiveness is Grace filled and cosmic, inconceivably vast...a gift modelled by Christ and DNA designed into the human soul~we are, after all, created in His image. 

Club Penquin

Years ago I remember being traumatized after watching a documentary called March of the Penquins. I have always loved these little stiff armed comical shuffling tuxedoed soldiers. What got me frightened and nightmarish is how programmed they are as creatures, compelled by the forces of nature to complete an annual trek to produce, care for and protect their babies only to have many of them freeze to death. Sometimes a parent is so grieved over their loss that they attempt to steal a babe from another parent. My son used to play a game many will recognize called Club Penquin. In the game, the penquins are humanized with clothing, homes and electronics as purchasable items with up grades available~in game games allowed for some cheap item purchases while real parental dollars enriched the faked up fowl with extravagant costumes, larger igloos and colourful pets. My son and his girlfriend reminisced last week about this game~it was an obsession for many and a place to virtually meet friends, a safe environment free from adults, except of course, the brilliant designers of The Game. The Game, you know what I'm talking about. The striving, the climbing, the efforts we all make to get somewhere, be someone, DO SOMETHING important for goodness sakes. I take these juxtaposed real verses virtual penguins and see humanity in all its glory and fakery. Penguins marching across glacial expanses risking life and limb for the sake of propagation, for the continuance of their breed. The love of their babies so evident that it is heart wrenching. The thought of self is foreign, un-introduced, impossible for these driven adorable ice walkers~they are simply unaware of their bravery and commitment to life, even when it is threatened and at risk. In today's venacular, these penguins have a "compelling why" for their existence. In The Game, the compelling why is competitive, comparative, condescending and oh so humanesque. The Game is a replica of the masses, clamouring for stuff and like the real penguins, awareness of self is not evident. Inexplicably moved by forces unquestioned, uninvestigated, in The Game a compelling why is a none purchasable item. Here is where we have arrived, at the hugest question of them all. WHY DO YOU EXIST? Want another? So WHAT? I mean what kind of penguin/human are YOU? There isn't a penguin in the world that will read this so I guess it's just you and I. YOU are here for a reason, WHAT IS IT? What is your "compelling why?". One life, one love, let's make it count. 

Wait

Two years ago, I selected a theme word of surrender as a marker, a reminder of allowing rather than making things happen~the subtlety of watching for clues and being moved rather than trying too hard and forcing~this was my evolutionary soul desire. During the course of the year, my word transformed and I travelled from surrender to follow Spirit, the Holy Spirit residing in me, given as a gift of faith from Christ to His followers. Sounds so delightfully easy, doesn't it? I am a willful person, submission through surrender, trusting God instead of me? Tough pill to swollen as an automated emotionally independent and stubborn human creature. Following Spirit rather than my own self serving wants and childish demands has not been easy and yet, the abundance of blessings bestowed as I connect wholeheartedly with God as my Three in One are astounding. This year, my theme word started out as patience and while everything in life moves, shifts and changes, I too have moved and as before, my word has changed from patience to wait...I will wait. This speaks to my not knowing what, how, when and who? My wise still young son said to me recently "it's none of your business who you coach". He reminded me that I do not work for humans~they are my delight, my joy to engage. My employer is God Almighty and my work is to Glorify Him, work for His praise and acknowledgment. Psalm 39:7 "And now, Lord, for what do I wait? My hope is in You." What is your soulful theme, your growth area for the coming year? Where does Light need to shine in the darkness of your soul? I surrender as I follow Spirit, patiently waiting for The Good Shepard to lead me. What is your soul statement this very day?

Linchpin

Linchpin is defined as: 1 a pin passed through the end of an axle to keep a wheel in position; 2 a person or thing vital to an enterprise or organization. Without the linchpin, a wheel is dangerously unstable and at risk of falling away, putting anyone in the wheels path in jeopardy. Taking this theme a little farther, a human linchpin is the make or break vitality of an enterprise or organization and without the linchpin, there is a dead in the water feeling, a no go, not going to happen sentiment. Distilling this idea further, we have linchpin attitudes and perspectives. Let's use a highly charged example from a relational viewpoint. If you do what I want you to do, say what I want you to say, behave the way I have commanded you, I in turn will drop in the safety linchpin in our relationship by rewarding you with kind gestures, a sweet demeanour and disposition and happiness between us will abound. Now let's explore what happens when the opposite is true. Test me, go on, go against what I have dictated as acceptable word, deed, thought and like a hand grenade, I will pull that linchpin and you WILL feel the excruciating pain of having to live in negative space relationship with me. I speak of the linchpin in the negative, as a manipulative tool of possible destruction. This is not the intended dictionary definition and yet, it works in my example. The forces of good and evil, they live within us. We get to choose how we weild or weld, rip apart or melt chocolate like together. We have this power to help or hinder, heal or hurt and we are pivotal in the lives of those who cross our paths. Being pivotal is defined as: of crucial importance in relation to the development or success of something else, in other words, it is much like a linchpin. Now let's look at you, what kind of linchpin are YOU?

Individuation

Individuation. It's a word that has stayed with me since university days. It is the process of separating oneself out from others, a normal natural self discovery time of who am I? It goes something like this: babyhood to eighteen the child is led, taught, guided, advised by parents, adults with influence in their lives; eighteen to twenty one, young adult begins to question what they have been taught and starts to throw away what does not make sense, what seems illogical and biased on the part of the misguided adults they have been unduly subjected to. Resentment for being tricked, lied to may show up and this causes tension between the young adult and the parents or adults of influence in the child/young adults life. Attitude is tell me the truth, I can not tolerate less than the truth, life MUST make sense. At about twenty to twenty one, there is a dawning, a knowing that the world is complicated, it is never black and white, right and wrong, it is a confused jumble of what ifs and wherefores and the young adult tail spins and realizes, to quote Socrates "All I know is that I know nothing". Twenty one to twenty five, young adult has taken from youth and from new adulthood learnings and decides what to keep, what to throw away~pruning their belief systems. These are the hallmarks, the rights of passage for many a thoughtful life traveller. Change inevitably leaves marks, little nicks and their resultant scars on the relationships that started out with babe in arms and at some point turned into something new, yet to be investigated, new terrain to travel with some construction, yield, bumpy roads ahead signs warning the travellers to proceed with caution. Parenting, the only job in the world that can fulfill & frighten all at the same time with the knowledge that doing it right is virtually impossible. Young adulthood, the exciting and unsure place of what is next and does it matter? Love is the only forever glue that heals all, knows all and can see around all the corners and turns in life. Flowers can be seen bursting forth through concrete, walls and sidewalks constructed to keep nature at bay and under control...each human is a wild flower with the seed of greatness within waiting to burst forth in glorious brilliance, unencumbered by man, undaunted...the flower can't help itself, it does not know any better, it simply must BE, do what comes naturally. I dedicate this to my son, Matthew Ryan Byers. My gift from God, my little King, you are a changling. I see the man you are becoming and I await further instruction from our Heavenly Father on this next, new part of our relationship. Faithfully devoted, your mum, LGB