Waiting

Waiting...I did a lot of that today. My husband had surgery on his nose, three hours of cut and paste, putting things where they belong so that he can breathe better and we can both get a good nights sleep, eventually. I'm waiting, at Tim Hortons, for prescriptions to be filled, and I am sleepy, quiet, by myself in and amongst people, alone and in couples.  There is no hurry, no worry, just this, me writing and waiting. Somehow, this is the most peaceful I have been in quite some time. Nowhere to go, nothing to see, just me and time and Tim's of course. This is the first time in my life that I have sat solo, in a coffee shop, without waiting for someone to join me...huh, what's next?

Noble Ones

Today I am overcome, with the tender hearted, the noble ones who for the sake of another, forsake themselves. There is a "look away" feeling, a "don't look at me" sense that I pick up as the noble ones are loathe to get to much attention but I can't look away, I must gaze, drink them in, see them fully in their quiet majesty.  To not see them, to not notice, is to deny, reject a gift. Cloaked heavily in self depricating thoughts and words, they do not see themselves, they are the ones looking away, sorry, sorely wanting no one to know...they are the precious ones, they deserve the love, the attention, the appreciation for who they are.  I am lost, wanting for them, longing for them to know, to believe and see what is Truth...they are beautifully made.

Honesty for the Sake of Learning

If you're not there, you'll be exposed to ridicule...a line from The Big Bang Theory. This situation comedy delights me, because the characters dare to say things that often cross the mind but are rarely verbalized. In the context of friendship, there is freedom of honest expression and while some of the banter between the friends is caustic, the understanding is that the intention is never to hurt or cause lasting pain. Each character is unique and quirky but there is always room for the quirks, an acceptance rare and wonderful. As I watch, I see the coaching model, with blurting, intruding, acknowledgement, fierce courage, championing, calling forth and calling out, deepening the learning and forwarding the action. Yes, it's television, but it is brilliantly presented television, modelling the intricacies of interaction in a loving and playful way.  Honesty for the sake of learning, this is what I love most about coaching. 

Dark Cloud Mocked

You are my dark cloud on a sunny day, you bring the rain and wash the rays away.  You see the dirt upon the snow, I can't eat it now, where will I go, to get snow white, fresh crisp and clean, for you have peed where I want to glean...this is my mock tribute to all the naysayers, whiners, complainers. The people who ATTEMPT to make life miserable for the hopeful, the optimistic, the happily inclined. I would feel sorry for these "there's always a black lining" people but I'm too busy feeling annoyed! What I love is the effervescence of the soul, the bright glowy part that shines out of the eyes, and rings clearly in the voice with joy, excitement and enthusiasm for what is good, true and right. The world owes us nothing, whatever we have is a gift and all can be taken away as easily as we got it...I say NO to those who try to dim the Light, and YES to the bubbling laughter that comes with appreciation for all that is and can be. 

Direction Determines Destination

Direction determines destination...these are the wise words I heard this morning.  One thought, one perception, can direct our every action, and if that one thought or perception comes from deep seeded guilt or regret, the life that follows "it" can feel like perpetual punishment. We all fall short of perfect, with our own stories of missteps, poor judgment, wrong doing.  Remorse is a beautiful gift, it is a call to introspection, character building and refinement. Regret to, speaks to a knowing better than, a sense that if I had to do it all over again, it would be different this time. Consequences are far reaching, often times keeping us painfully reminded of choices we wish we could erase...this is were forgiveness comes into play. Choosing to forgive ourselves and others frees us from the energetic choke hold regret and remorse keep us in.  Our past does not have to determine our future.  No amount of regret changes what was, but in peaking back, you can see how you got to here, and from here, DECIDE, what's next?  Thanks Jon Korkidakis, you are one smart man!

Brave Honesty

"My happiness is up to me, so you are off the hook".  Some clever person made this up, and I'm inclined to play with it a bit, change it around and put a coaching spin on it, here I go. Your happiness is up to you, so I'm off the hook...I like this phrase either way, but I particularly like the message, which speaks to an accountability for each of us. People lie, they cheat, they lack integrity, not all people, but enough of them to cause a significant amount of pain for the people who trust them, believe in them, give them the benefit of the doubt, despite the red lie flags. One of the tell tail signs of a lie is blame.  The guilty, the liars, usually blame another, excusing themselves from responsibility, making a bid or plea for sympathy.  If there is a repeated theme, a never ending story of sameness, the story teller becomes suspect and trust erodes between them and their would be happiness helper. Another tell tale sign, complaining without changing~I ask you, what is the point?  Choice, always choice. We chose how we are treated, we chose how we treat others, we chose accountability or blame.  We can also chose to believe in our lie detecting abilities AND to honour ourselves and say NO to the liars and YES to The Truth.  Choice, what a gift. One last thing, we do a liar no favour by allowing the bad behaviour...they may never hear the Truth if no one is brave enough to speak it to them.  

Stop Talking

I have been a coughing fool for over a week.  When I laugh, I cough.  When I talk, I cough...my husband suggested I refrain from talking, funny guy!  But maybe, just maybe, he has a point?  Silence isn't my forte, it is yet to become my friend.  I worked with a coach recently who asked powerful questions but didn't give time for answers, new coaches do that, and as a new coach, I'm still learning pace and I too ask questions without space for answers, I must will myself to w a I t.  I gave the coach feedback, I told him his questions were like dynamite, that they were powerful and explosive and he should drop the question, allow the explosion and let the client pick up the pieces.  Metaphor is becoming a language for me, and I find meaning in all the experiences life offers. The cough is a funny metaphor, an annoying reminder that the noise of the cough is useless, purposeless~when I compare this to words, they too become like useless noise, annoying and purposeless when overused.