Let Go

A family outing had us driving through the African Lion Safari, where tropical creatures roamed freely.  Animals stuck their heads into open car windows looking for a quick snack fix, and they weren't exactly shy or polite in their efforts. Fascinated, I watched a mother monkey grazing while holding tightly, the tail of her bouncing baby. The baby wanted to go here, then there, and the mother knew that restraint was in order, to keep the toddler safe: it didn't know about danger yet, the babe required an older, wiser, parental monkey, to guard and protect it from predators, and from its own wild self. 

Do you have a baby in your life, dear reader? This morning I see myself figuratively letting go of the back of a shirt I have held onto. I see the futility of my efforts to save, to secure, to guard and protect, someone that is out of my reach. Let go, let go. I hear these words in my head but my heart says, Must I? How can I? What will happen to them if I do, let go? Do I really have to? 

She is not yours. She is mine. 

God is mercy, God is grace. God is pure love, and he loves in ways unfathomable. Sometimes I think I am the only one that feels his love, because he is all mine all day long. Therein is the pleasure and the pain: It is excruciating knowing him this way, and also knowing, that someone, many someones, that we know and love, do not know him as we do. I grab a fistful of shirt in my mind, and try to steer and direct my baby, or pull her to me to hold her close: Stay with me, stay with me, I want to plead, We will go in together. 

In where? you ask. Why the throne room of course, I reply. Do you know of it? Have you heard of the King? He has a sceptre and he has extended it to you to touch its tip. He is seated at the right hand of the Father, and he bids you, Come near. 

I don't want to pull at the back of shirts. I don't want to drag the unwilling where they do not want to go. I want to extend my hand, have fingers interlace, and delight in the pleasure of walking side-by-side with my kindred, to pay homage to the Sovereign of souls. 

Today I was reminded of the word prescience, defined as:

Foreknowledge of events, divine omniscience, human anticipation of the course of events: FORESIGHT

The word prescient perfectly applies to God. In his generosity, he bestows abilities to his children, that feel like offshoots of prescience; they take the invisible form of discernment, insight, anticipation, foresight, or a knowing that feels like deja vu. We know, for instance, and have been taught via scripture, to trust in his Word and by virtue of trusting in The Word, we feel the despair of not knowing, whether someone we love will be with us in heaven, when death crosses the thresholds of our different doors. We have an understanding or foreknowledge of events, since we have been divinely instructed, and we anticipate the course that God has revealed will be taken, and with this knowledge, we despair, or at least, I do, I have. 

While the world spins round and round, I fear some will be tossed off, shot into space, never to be seen again. While my faith roots me to the God of the universe, many a lost soul looks to the universe for signs and wonders, to confirm their magical thinking. I WANT ... I want ... I want ... to have everyone I love, to love Jesus. Is that too much to ask?

I asked God this morning if my tears matter, if my pleading changes anything. In other words, Can I cry someone into heaven? Will my begging make a difference? His response now, is the same as the one I heard this morning, Let go of the back of that shirt. She is not yours. She is mine. 

It feels as though he might have to pry my fingers, one by one, off of that shirt I have bunched up in my desperation. He loves her and knows her far better than I ever will, and he is her Father. I must remember this always, as I attempt one more time, to let go. 

The Bible says we must pray, and God never gives instructions in vain. There is reason in his directives, so I will pray without ceasing; I will hope without tiring; I will petition without being petulant. I will pray and pray some more. 

As a side note, dear reader, isn't it kind of insanely funny, how idiotic men tried to take God out of science? Look here:

God is DIVINE PREscience

God is OMNIscience

He is the first, the last, and the all in all. No one can take God out of the equation, without putting themselves in peril. 

Revelation 1:8

I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the ending, saith the Lord, which is, and which was, and which is to come, the Almighty.