I read today, "God's Gospel church is called the Israel of God", can anything be more marvellous, dear reader? How better to be marked as God's people, than to be known as those that mourn in Zion? And what more satisfaction can we possibly ask for, than to have our ashes become beautiful, our mourning become the oil of joy, our laden grievous spirit to become garments of praise, so that we might be called trees of righteousness, planted of the LORD, that he might be glorified?!
In 2017, my life lay in ruins. It didn't show on the outside ~ I didn't share what was happening in my life with many people, I carried on, business as usual ~ but there were times when I lay face to the floor, plastered there, sobbing and begging God for redemption, a hint of healing, a drop of hope for the changes that were necessary for my family to be rebuilt and restored to his will, his way. God does not ignore the repentant, he will not refuse those that plead for forgiveness, and restoration, and a return to his family. I knew I had to confess my sins, understand the sins of those that had come before me through blood lines, and those of my former husband too ... the cumulative sin was noxious, and the sins of the fathers, and mothers that we call ancestors, really do, impact offspring, mine included.
When I look back, I see myself prostrate but it is only now, that I recognize no matter where I wept, face down and unseeing, Jesus was standing before me. Bit by daily bit, incremental change occurred. I was a half-ling, a semblance of my former confident and perhaps cocky self, and God gave me insights into my flawed character, where I had relied solely on my own strength and sometimes silly beliefs, and he filled me with a hunger and thirst to be holy, as he is holy. As long as I live, I will desire this type of food and drink more than anything else in this lovely world. The Holy Spirit satisfies the soul, and as my good friend Lanie spoke to me just yesterday, he is redeeming my ashes for beauty.
While I share in writing, dear reader, I remain a rather private person. I will not divulge who and what and how, people in my life have been transformed through the power of prayer. Those closest to me already know my story, and prayed as only the saints can do in time of turmoil and trouble. I am glad to be called a family member of the Gospel Church, known as the Israel of God. He saved me long before I drew my first earthly breath; saved me and my family in 2017, and saves me still, from one day to the next ... and it is prayer, humble, meek, seeking, finding, grateful for all the blessings prayer, that is a gift from God that I will always treasure and cherish.
Are you troubled? Does it seem as though the tide has turned on you, and as the water rises, you have no escape, and will simply drown in your sorrow? Have the circumstances gotten to the point that you have exhausted all your emotional and even physical resources, and you are so spent as to not want to get up off your face from that floor? Pray, dear one, pray. Get out your Bible, read it, soak it up, and feel the rush of certain hope, knowing God loves a repentant and pleading child and that he will exchange your ashes for beauty too. It may not look like you had planned, but your life will be better than you anticipated, all for the glory of our God, through Christ our Lord.
Amen
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