Ambient Light

What if all that we see is too bright, too dark. The harsh light of our own vision, the way we see or don't see the world, brightness and shadow blinding us to the subtlety of ambience. Settle your heart and mind on a sunrise. The first hints of light stretch cat like across the earth, gentle fingers of light reaching toward you, awakening you for the day. Now close your eyes, feel the light and warmth. The sweet caress of the sun, heightening your senses. This slow and sumptuous filling up with Light is incomparable and Glory laden, awe inspired. The sun, it worships the Creator and the created cannot help but be struck, stunned into appreciation when witnessing the rising. Which brings me to you, to me. Each day is a new dawn, a rising. God is Ambient Light, He is subtle sparkling dust in the Rays. What if our eyes adjusted to His Light, His ways? What if we use our sight in the searching for the mystery that resides in faith? Miracles sparkle and shimmer  in Ambient Light and when we train our eyes, we can't help but see The Source of all that brightens in a darkening world. May your eyes see that which only the Spirit can enlighten.

Reality as Motivator

Reality is a great motivator. Look here, look over there, keep your eyes averted. Your eyes will take you in a direction and your body, it naturally follows. You WILL get somewhere by keeping your eyes averted, the question is, it that where you want to go? Take stock now, be brave. Look at what you have, compare it to what you want to have? How are you doing? Is there a vast, sucking gapping hole? Alternatively, you have no gaps and life looks and feels precisely as you want and you are loving every bit of your here and now. If this is the case, move along, stop reading this. Keep doing what you are doing and ride that joy train for all its worth. There is one more option here. Most items in your life are quite good and you are satisfied with perhaps a glaringly obvious exception. What is the exception to your otherwise happy existence? If you are still with me, I suspect that there were one or more immediate exceptions that popped up in front of you. These are now your eyes, you can see. Your attention is on your reality, the parts of who you are that have not yet been filled in. You are a drawing awaiting the colour to complete the picture. My Dear, you are the one with the paints, the crayons or if you prefer, the smooth texturized loveliness of pastels. Where are you right now? Where do you want to be? Getting from A to C requires the action plan of a B. Now that your eyes are on the prize, whatever will you do? How motivated are you to make your true calling, your divinely intended purpose a reality? One Life, One Love, your colours and texture to choose. 

Processed

Imagine...I enter the office and approach the receptionist and as I draw near, she lifts her head and looks me directly in the eye and asks "Have you been processed?". I tilt my head ever so slightly to the right and with what must seem like a look of confusion, I respond "processed?". She politely and knowing smiles back at me and suggests I make myself comfortable for a short wait in the lounge. Someone will come for me in a quick moment. Processed, processed, what does this mean? My imagination runs wild and I envision lying supine on a conveyer belt that moves steadily toward chopping and dicing industrial blades, dividing my body up into chunky pieces. Arms go in one bin, legs in another, torso drawn and quartered and my head, well that goes in a different direction all together and is carted off in a strange blue basket. "Hello, are you Linda?" a gentle non butcher like man asks, interrupting my nightmarish imaginings. Startled, I respond somewhat suspiciously, "um, yes, I'm Linda". "Great to meet you, I'm Alex. Welcome to process, or as we like to call it, the meat grinder." Processed is defined as: a series of actions or steps taken in order to achieve a particular end; a systematic series of mechanized or chemical operations that are performed in order to produce something. Have you been processed, Dear Reader? The rich life, the one with meaning and substance, it calls for processing. What do I mean by this, you ask? There is a culling, a gathering of the choice things and parts that require some attention from you, from me. There are parts in each of us that are dark, secret and hidden bits of nastiness, selfishness, ugliness. We know they are there, hidden in the shadows, lurking. There are also hurt, sad, wounded seemingly untouchable, unreachable parts of us that live and breath, sitting in a lonely corner of our soul, wanting comfort and release from pain. How about resentment, fear, and anger, do you recognize these companions? Look again at the definitions of process. There are steps to be taken, painful and at first tentative actions in a series required to achieve a particular end. What is the end, you ask? To be you, of course, the full on you that only you can be. Uproot the nasty, heal the hurt, comfort the wounded parts of you by taking stock of what sits waiting in the dark hidden netherlands of you. They are reachable, touchable BUT, you have to be willing to be drawn and quartered, perhaps put through the meat grinder of soul searching and course correction in order to find and live as the real you. How willing are you, Dear Reader, to be processed?

The word authenticity begs a quest, as everyone is wanting to be this thing, authentic. Posers prevail in a smoke and mirrors world and it is rare that someone, anyone, asks with keen interest, what do you value?  

This past weekend marked the one year mark of the start of my quest for this authenticity thing. What I learned is that it forever and always, starts with me, by going within. The tools of the coaching trade draw heavily on what is valuable, valued, and from this starting point, the inner spot light searching begins. 

Was I inauthentic before, insincere, disingenuous, a big hairy liar?  I don't believe this to be true, but I did have defence mechanisms in place and I probably still do, although they are smaller and more easily identifiable. Thankfully, I am willing to have them knocked down with an out of order sign placed on them. 

This takes me back to me, and you, and valuing self as the answer to the question of being authentic. Pleasing others is a guessing game, sometimes we get it right, sometimes we miss the mark, making us wonder what we did wrong or could have done differently. When living according to what we value, we stop this nonsensical game and start being what we believe.  

I believe in my own humanity, that it am here to love and learn, share and receive, and so much more. How can I go wrong when these are my guiding principals, when these are my valuables? 

What are yours? Who are you? Who knows the real you and if no one does, what are you protecting yourself from?

Abomination

Last night my husband and I were watching Donald Trump while listening to his rhetoric. I was astounded when my husband used the word abomination to describe the Donald. The definition of abomination is: a thing that causes disgust or loathing; a feeling of hatred. We have watched dumbfounded as this man speaks endlessly, circularly in front of audiences who seem to want him redeemed. They are polite and deliver platitudes, nodding with mindless grins in strange agreement to what senselessly seems to pour fluidly from this mans trout mouth. I shake my head not able to comprehend what is going on? Blind deaf and dumb (not the muted kind), it would appear that Trump lovers can be well educated and completely situationally unaware. He is, as the word so aptly describes him, an abomination. While I must confess that Trump repulses me, it is the potential voters for this man that scare the bejeezus out of me. What in the name of God are they considering? What could possibly move someone to vote for a man who aggressively attacks in pure paranoia anyone who ever so slightly challenges his statements? He is right when he says he is not a politician. Suddenly, he is giving politicians a good name-how does THAT happen? Back to the voters now. If Donald is an abomination, what does this make the people who support him, agree with him, follow him blindfolded right into a massive wall of divisiveness? He is a caricature of a man and left to his own devices, in his insular world, he can only harm those who do business with him, whether they be family or otherwise. In the world, he is someone who inspires loathing, disgust, feelings of hatred. Is he truly representative of hundreds, even thousands of Americans, as he so proudly claims and evidenced by the cheering laughing crowds that sit transfixed when he endlessly verbally vomits? An abomination is an offence to God. Lets see Donald as he is, shall we? He is self worshipping and those that follow him have made him their idol. It appals the senses of the sensible, the Godly. James 4:6 "But he gives us even more grace to stand against such evil desires. As the Scriptures say, "God opposes the proud but favours the humble." God is in control and we are subject to his natural laws, including reaping what we sow. I pray that in this situation, the awake and aware speak up and loudly declare this man NOT the president of the United States. Now that would be a blessing on America.

Sleeplessness

The house is quiet~almost. I can hear gentle snoring and the furnace blowing. I am wide awake. Last night too, wide awake. I have heard and read that full moons and tides can interrupt sleep patterns. This morning, after an almost sleepless night, I asked Siri, was there a full moon last night? I was taken to the Internet answer, that yes indeed, a super moon had lit up the sky, appearing larger than ever. It has taken a full twenty years for us to see this planet so up close and personal. My question~am I supposed to be outside, howling at the moon? This thought entertains me, because I stay in bed wondering when I might get tired and drift off to lala land. How to use my time? I have to wonder about the rhythm of nature and our human ebb and flow with the tides of the oceans and more curiously, the ebb and flow of this mysterious life. I am organic and so are you. The moon and tides don't really care about me living inside and trying to keep them outside, apparently, I am awake because I am meant to be. I know I am not the only one. God, He has me alone with Him in the still. He wants me to hear Him. He hung the moon and stars, the earth that floats untethered in space and maybe He does want me to howl and acknowledge Him? I acknowledge Him now. God, You are my Everything. 

Imitation Crab Meat

Fish masquerading as a crab

There are imitations everywhere and one of them has always kind of made me laugh and wonder, why? Why imitation crab meat? If you have ever looked at this fish masquerading as crab, you will notice that the manufacturers have gone to great lengths to make the product look like it has come right out of a crab shell. How come? If you have tasted crab and then try the imitation, you will notice that they are not at all comparable. Real crab meat is far more tastebud satisfying.

This is a game of bait and switch

Reading product labels reveals ingredient truth and I think this is where the trick has been played on the would be crab eater. When labels aren't read, the uninitiated crab meat eater is susceptible to trickery. Look around you, the real thing or cheap copies can be found everywhere. Imitation is a form of lying, misrepresentation. For the uninformed, this is a game of bait and switch. I hold the world suspect, don't you?

The hefty price of fakery and fraud

What are we buying, swallowing whole that is making us sick? What is the hefty price we pay for all the fakery and fraud we are sold? Look at your beliefs, dear reader, what are you buying that someone else is selling that leaves you hungry for the real, the original? It is up to you, up to me to sense, feel, and discern the difference: 
"The ear tests words it hears just as the mouth distinguishes between foods" (Job 12:11). Nature doesn't lie, man on the other hand, he has a lot of explaining to do. Look for yourself, a crab comes in its own packaging, it's own shell and if put in a tin for sale, one ingredient would be listed, crab meat. Not so for the imitation version.

Are you following a stranger?

Let's go now to where I am pointing us: there is One man who said he is I Am, One man who boldly stated that he is God, The Alpha & Omega, Beginning & End. He said he is the Gate, The Good Shepherd and here is the grandest message for us to receive today:

"Very truly I tell you Pharisees, anyone who does not enter the sheep pen by the gate, but climbs in by some other way, is a thief and a robber. The one who enters by the gate is the shepherd of the sheep. The gatekeeper opens the gate for him, and the sheep listen to his voice. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. When he has brought out all his own, he goes on ahead of them, and his sheep follow him because they know his voice. But they will never follow a stranger; in fact, they will run away from him because they do not recognize a stranger's voice" (John 10:1-5).

Can you hear his voice, calling you by name? He knows each one of his lambs and they know him. A thief, a robber, these cannot trick nor steal the sheep. The sheep hear with their hearts, and listen with their minds and follow The Original. Dare I list the thieves masquerading as alternatives, other gateways to heaven? Are you considering them now, dear reader? Imitation or real crab meat, which do you prefer? Imitation or real God, which do you prefer? Don't like crab meat or God? I guess that too, is a choice.

No Where

I am walking my dog and he happily wags his tail and leads me in the direction of a man in a garage. The driveway is neatly plowed and so are the sidewalks in front of the house. We approach the man and he proceeds to speak to and pet Caesar. He seems to be a pleasant man, and we have dogs in common. We banter back and forth and then out of the blue, I get very specific instructions on the supplements I should be getting for my dog. Knowing myself, I reply, "well thats not going to happen" to which I heard a judgemental "why not, just ask your vet about them and he can get them for you." I am grinning as I write this because our conversation continued and I learned his profession and while I will keep that part to myself, I have to tell you that I feel sorry for the people he works with, has power and influence over. He is a person that hears himself, values his own opinions, has decided what is and isn't. He is an authority on many a subject and perhaps, all subjects? In a very short span of time, I learned a lot about his opinions and points of view and I couldn't wait to get the heck out of there. Upon reflection, I realize that he couldn't see me or hear me. How do I mean this or know this, you ask? Well I know his eyes and ears work so I am not suggesting a physical impediment to seeing and hearing. What I mean is that we did not have a meeting of our minds and hearts because when I spoke, he did not respond to me, he appeared to be responding to thoughts and perhaps more specifically, arguments in his head? As I write, I realize that he is a prover, someone who has come to conclusions based on internal arguments with himself and that his resolve is to stay there, having found himself to be, right. Luckily for me, another dog and owner came along and broke up this strange encounter, just as I was wondering how I would be delivered! What I realize, a day later, is that we, he and I, got no where. He stayed the same after meeting me. I want to stay away after meeting him. How sad, for both of us? Caesar, he loved this guy, and peed a whole lot on his snow covered property. Maybe he knows something I haven't learned yet?

One Life, One God, your dogs love to choose. 

Renewal

Renewal. There is within us the ability to renew. Every seven to ten years, all body cells are made new. How is this possible? If I compare my body to my vehicle, there are nicks and scratches, little wounds and scars, evidence of use. This said, when I bang my shin against my bed before entering it at night, somehow the pain is sharply brief and depending on the contact intensity, I may or may not feel the hit the next day. Within a week or even days, the tenderness has faded, provided I haven't bashed that same spot again. My car on the other hand, it continues to display injury and since it is inanimate, it is incapable of self renewal. Encoded in our cells is this ability to replace what is old with new and life carries on, hopefully for a long time. Now let's look at the soul. In relationship, the essence of our being gets battered and bruised, knocked about and insulted. Misunderstood and wounded, the soul searches for renewal, for at the very least, a glimpse of hopeful restoration to what was once joyful. Searching for Light to illuminate, give answers to what the injuries are, how they happened and what can be done for the sake of healing and restoration, the soul is arduous in its efforts for renewal. Who cannot relate to this hurt, this ache of loss? Each time I think of friendship lost, it seems I am quickly reminded of a grave yard, of the many friendships that once were vibrant and than dulled over time, losing lustre. Time stamped somehow, relationship can have an expiry date. It is easy to be logical about relationship breaks, to say things like we grew apart, we see the world differently, they changed/I changed and yet, this does not dispel the feelings of hurt, disappoint, loss and a longing for what was or perhaps could have been. A reconciling of life without the beloved person of affection can be rather bitter to the taste buds when expressed by the mouth. Here is the finality of all this meandering, the how to of renewal. I know God loves the people in my life and the ones that fleetingly enter and leave again far more than I ever possibly can. When I feel the sting of loss or disappointment, I remember that they belong to Him, that they are His, not mine. So, what do I do, you ask? I give them back! There is a two fold benefit to this. Firstly, I see them as valuable and worthy of renewal, just as I am. Secondly, I separate myself from the stringy past, the memory rope of what was and could have been. In doing so, I free them and me from "leaning on a cobweb" that exists in my heart memory. This may or may not be helpful for you Dear Reader. I am but one person trying to make sense of what I see, hear and experience in this life. What I do know is this: we are inclined toward renewal, being made anew, and about every seven years or so, we physically manifest Gods encoded in our DNA ability to be born again.

One Life, One Love, ours to discover. 

Abandonment Price

I heard the term abandonment price and for me, this is defined as letting go of fear of recrimination for the sake of a cause, something so profound that the risk of ridicule and alienation is extremely high and yet it does not impede a persons trajectory. In other words, the impelling urge to live a life of abandon is so strong that nothing else matters. Abandonment to what, you ask? What kind of price are we talking about here? I think of the Apostles, post crucifixion. Three days pasted, there was much weeping and mourning over the death of Christ. Prior to His death, Jesus experienced the despair of abandonment. His friends fell asleep and ultimately deserted Him in His time of suffering and need. Jesus came with a purpose, for a cause, and He kept His sights on this, with the hefty price of societal belittling, physical abuse and murdourous slander. The incalculable price He paid was the giving of His life, with all sins past present and future substitutionary paid, for you, for me. Imagine your shock if today you attend the burial of a friend and three days from now, they enter your home, with love in their eyes, despite how wickedly you treated them in their time of need? The opportunity to be sorry, forgiven and fortified in renewed fellowship would be an astounding gift, wouldn't you say? This would change everything for me, how about for you? This turn of events did change everything for these apostles and disciples~they knew without doubt who Jesus really is, the Living God. What they had not known, could never have anticipated or imagined, became a reality and their lives were changed forever and into eternity. Let's turn our gaze inward, shall we? What cause, what purpose moves you to abandonment of self protection, comfort, preservation? What makes you feel such aliveness that the price you potentially pay for living with such devotion is just plain old worth it because to not do so would be a pure and living hell? We live in community, members of families and other circles of closeness. Choices are not always popular or appreciated and yet, there is a calling, a voice that whispers when will you return to Me, honour Me, love Me, live and die, for Me? Lay it down, lay it all down, that is the request. Follow no other, have no other gods. Follow Me. I will leave you with this from the gospel of Luke 14:27 "And whoever does not carry their cross and follow me cannot be my disciple."

The Accuser

"One day the members of the heavenly court came again to present themselves before the Lord, and the Accuser, Satan, came with them. Where have you come from?" The Lord asked Satan. Satan answered the Lord, "I have been patrolling the earth, watching everything that's going on."  Job 2:1-2 Here is a snippet, a small sampling of what is written in the bible. This is a glimpse of what the spiritual realm looks and sounds like, a conversation between God and Satan. Satan is known by many names and one of them is the Accuser~in this case, Satan searches the earth to find someone, namely Job, to accuse him of not being faithful to God. Notice that Satan is reporting his actions to God and that he has been "patrolling the earth, watching everything that's going on". How does reading this impact you? What is going on in your head, your heart? Are you pausing and wondering, curious about this exchange between the Lord and the Accuser, Satan? In a Police song, the lyrics go like this: "we are spirits, in a material world" and the challenge here is to open the eyes and ears of the heart, the very soul, to allow sight into the world that exists as a parallel version of what we currently experience. It occurs to me that the other side is an amplified version and we have the toned down, muted suggestion of what is brilliant. We have glimpses of perfection and what can be and this, my friend, is what the Accuser works hard to keep us from knowing. Have you ever felt such abundant joy that bursting from the seams seemed eminent? How about despair, deep grieving and sorrow that threatened to devour you alive? This is the human condition and all around us, there are spirits, fighting the good fight to save souls and contrary to this, evil spirits roaming the earth seeking, accusing, ravenous for prey. On the one side, there is the love of the Father who sees His children and calls them home through faithfulness and thanksgiving. On the other, there is the one who sees souls as quarry, hunted prey. You, my friend, are a wishbone for the devil...he doesn't care what side of you he gets, he wants to break you in half. Who do you belong to? Does this scare you at? I am not frightened for myself because I know to whom I belong. I am, however, very much frightened for those who deny, ignore, reject subjects of the soul. We are spirit living in material fleshly bodies that die, we DIE. While in the body, you still have time, you get to choose, see, hear, listen for the voice of The King, calling your name. There is a heavenly court and you are known there. You are being watched, lovingly followed and tracked and while you are free to do as you wish, you are invited to honour your God as He asks you to consider heavenly realms, the more to this life, sight unseen and yet felt. Do you feel it, this tug of war? You are precious in the eyes of God. He will not force His hand with you because He gave you freedom to choose, sovereignty over your own life. To not think and feel on these vital topics is at your own peril. While this sounds ominous it need not be, depending on what you choose. Choosing sides isn't new, you have done this a thousand times in your life. I ask you again, to Whom do you belong?

One Life, One Love, your side to choose.