Sudden Death vs Expected Demise

Dear reader, there is no such thing as sudden death, there is, however, expected demise. You live, you die, he she they them live, then they die. These statements would appear to be ludicrous comments from a simpleton, if it weren't for the fact that many a person does not seem to comprehend the concept of death. Think with me, how millions of souls rushed to the point of a syringe to secure life, only to be given a shot of death. While living, they decided to hedge their bets and believe the snake oil salesmen lie, that a polluted potion would add years to their existence: alas, nothing could have been further from truth. 

What is happening? is a question few want the honest answer to. I know what is happening, do you, dear reader? Cumulative sin has infected and infested minds, hearts, lungs, and every other moving body part of the masses: we limp while the wicked coating of vileness sinks into every part of our collective being, festering there like an unattended open pussing wound. If truth be told, we are responsible for our own soul and resultant body sickness. Sin opened the door as an invitation to death, as if to say, Come on in, let us hold hands and dance a jig! While dancing, ankles twisted, hearts raced faster than expected, blood curdled, and somehow baseline heath disappeared, never to be seen or heard from again. 

Our baseline health, you know, that comparative measure of I feel great, to I feel sickly, to I feel like I might be dying I am so ill, has changed forever. The covid injected, meaning those that got the covid shots, are not feeling great, they are sickly, and some are so ill that death really is imminent. When lives seem unnaturally shortened, and this is indeed happening, it isn't sudden, it is to be expected. Dear one, to my point: Is a teaspoon of arsenic acceptable, or just as deadly as a full syringe of the stuff? I contend that poison is poison, and when we strip away all the poisons that intoxicate and sicken the body, we reveal the hidden little and massive sins, that have ingratiated themselves in order to instigate and incite riot in the soul, in rebellion against God's perfect plan for humanity. 

Man thinks he can control his own life. This is laughable and insulting to God. I have no control of the chemical trail criminals that in mercenary fashion, pollute the air above so that it falls as acid rain to all the creatures below. We impact one another in wonderful, and in dastardly ways. Your sin, my sin, hurts, not only you and me, but everyone else too, since it is a contagion, and we do not act singularly in life. This is why love in the form of charity is a cure all: 

And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8)

Think with me, the damage the covid craze did, to relationships. Now we extrapolate: relationships were destroyed, with trust devoured by ravenous wolves that feed off of disgust (we were instructed to hate anyone that opposed our point of view during the great divide and conquer covid scheme), and now as the injected poison continues to work its magic (the concoction was satanically constructed, one element added to the next while worshipping Lucifer), we see our loved ones dying of aggressive illness, as though plagued. We certainly are in a plague of mammoth proportions, generated by men that serve the wicked one. 

Do you see what I see?  Let us strip our beds of all coverings. The sick bed, when taken down to the bare mattress, is covered in wiggling, squirming bugs. The only way to rid ourselves of them is to fumigate, or throw out that festering mattress. The bed of lies told and received as truth, must be scrutinized, held under a light that reveals what has been laid there, and been encouraged to grow. 

People are dying, this is true, and unfortunately, it is not surprising for those of us that wept for years on end, when the covid craze was all the rage. Those in the know, cried for what was happening, and what was about to happen, and for what is now happening. We knew death was imminent for the injected, and that it was just a matter of time, before we saw the fruition of a poison plan. Sudden death, as I indicated above, is no such thing: expected demise is far more accurate. 

I am writing with a calculated clarity, dear reader. I will say unequivocally, once again, that if you have been injected with the covid shots, you must repent if you have not already, and if you have indeed repented, you must pray for your loved ones that did similarly, to repent, because God did not instruct you, or them, to do so, to save you from a fraudulent virus, or to save your own life. God cannot be accused of evil, and to suggest people are dying at his hand, and passover the sins of the people, implying they are somehow innocent, is to call God's mercy, love, and long-suffering, into question. 

Instead of asking, Why is God doing this, or, Why is God allowing this? We must ask ourselves, each and every one of us, Why did we do this? Why are we so inclined to disobedience, at our own expense, and that of others?

It is Sunday, a day to read scripture in the quietness. A day to reflect and commune with our Maker. A day to appreciate the life we have been given, and in gratitude, thank God for his loving, tender care. No one loves like he does, and it does the soul a world of good to remember this. 

Covid Church-Ruler Cowards

Note, Church-rulers should impose only necessary things; things which Christ has made our duty, which have a real tendency to the edification of the church, and, as here (Acts 15:22-25), to the uniting of good Christians. If they impose things only to show their own authority, and to try people's obedience, they forget that they have not authority to make new laws, but only to see that the laws of Christ be duly executed, and to enforce the observance of them, page 159, Matthew Henry's Commentary, Acts to Revelation, volume 6. 

Obedience and observance. Observe, the Word of God; Obey the King of kings. 

Some human beings are pathetically dull, aren't they? in their repetitive attempts to command and control others. This type of human is exhausting, irritating, and has a tendency to suck the life force right out of those that try their very best, to make the most of relationship with them. Church-rulers, must not make up rules, or follow rules that God has not commanded, and yet ... the ancient tradition of thumbing noses at God Almighty continues without a hint of red faced shame. 

It is with much disdain that I write this blog. The cowards, blatant yellow bellied cowards, that dared to stand in front of empty seats and speak to their audiences from behind a monitor screen, about the dangers of covid and how, We will get through this; Jesus is with you, even though we can't be together, made me sick, and still causes my heart to beat rapidly with outrage, when I pull up the visuals from my memory. How dare they?

Now, dear reader, since the thin veil of facade has been torn asunder, we can see the cowards for who they are. Covid Church-Rulers, embraced the greatest lie of our generation, and spoon fed the vomit of propaganda to congregants, the very people they ought to have protectively laid down their lives for, by speaking Biblical truth. Drivel, that is what trickles from empty minds, down into lifeless throats, and out of the mouths of antichrist pastors ... I think of several pastors that I knew very, very well, and I consider them an embarrassment, and no matter what comes from their mouths, I declare they are not Christians, if they have not confessed the sin of being wrong, for wearing masks, for keeping distance, for closing and locking the doors of their "churches", and for keeping people OUT, while continuing to encourage monetary giving. O, dear reader, and if they dared to suggest covid injections, or took the poison in themselves, they are accessories to many a crime, including the criminal offence murder, of innocent babies, and all the test subjects that suffered and died to make vials and vials of injectable vile ingredients. 

I contend that church-rulers are Pharisees, and have the age old spirit of contradiction: they contra indicate God's commands, and are brazenly disobedient, hexing themselves and in turn, vexing everyone that sits under their false shepherd-hood. Anyone that has the God bestowed gift of discern, is now, if they did not originally, questioning what happened, to tilt the world sideways and hold it there? I picture a roller-coaster car hanging upside down, under the tracks, stopped and held in place with passengers starting to panic, while wondering, Will we die in this off-kilter position?

The only way to right ourselves is God straightening us out. The Bible does not impose, to impress: Jesus didn't come to throw a heavy yoke upon the necks of the vulnerable, he came to take the weight of sin off of all that know, the burden is crushing, and too heavy to bear. Covid is a spirit of oppression, and church-rulers/leaders inhaled this demon, letting it speak through them to the people that trusted them with their very souls. We go to church to learn about God and how we can be more like him, not to be handed a set of man-made rules that put us in peril, physically, emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually. 

I don't get many comments on my writing, except in private. People message me and give their opinions. I know that some pastors read my blogs, but they are cowards, and will not comment, because whether they admit it or not, they know they have sinned against the Lord, and the people he has given them to shepherd. I suggest, if you are a pastor, or church-ruler/leader, that embraced and shared the covid lie, you fall to your knees, plead for forgiveness before God, and then do the same in front of your flock, and resign immediately from your post, as unworthy to lead anyone. Perhaps your new found humility will save you from God's wrath. 

Ezekiel 34:1-12

And the word of the LORD came unto me, saying, Son of man, prophesy against the shepherds of Israel, prophesy, and say unto them, Thus saith the Lord GOD unto the shepherds; Woe be to the shepherds of Israel that do feed themselves! should not the shepherds feed the flocks? Ye eat the fat, and ye clothe you with the wool, ye kill them that are fed: but ye feed not the flock. The diseased have ye not strengthened, neither have ye healed that which was sick, neither have ye bound up that which was broken, neither have ye brought again that which was driven away, neither have ye sought that which was lost; but with force and with cruelty have ye ruled them. And they were scattered, because there is no shepherd: and they became meat to all the beasts of the field, when they were scattered. My sheep wandered through all the mountains, and upon every high hill: yea, my flock was scattered upon all the face of the earth, and none did search or seek after them. Therefore, ye shepherds, hear the word of the LORD; As I live, saith the Lord God, surely because my flock became a prey, neither did my shepherds search for my flock, but the shepherds fed themselves, and fed not my flock; therefore, O ye shepherds, hear the word of the LORD; thus saith the Lord God; Behold, I am against the shepherds; and I will require my flock at their hand, and cause them to cease from feeding the flock; neither shall the shepherds feed themselves any more; for I will deliver my flock from their mouth, that they may not be meat for them. For thus saith the Lord God; Behold, I, even I, will both search my sheep, and seek them out. As a shepherd seeketh out his flock in the day that he is among his sheep that are scattered; so will I seek out my sheep, and will deliver them out of the places where they have been scattered in the cloudy and dark day. 

Let us make muddy waters clear:

1. God instructed Ezekiel to prophesy against the shepherds of Israel

2. God indicts the shepherds with a Woe; rather than feeding the flocks, they fed themselves

3. The shepherds eat the fat (choice meat), clothe themselves in wool, eat from the fattened sheep, but do not feed the flock

4. The diseased have not be strengthen; the sick have not been healed, the broken have not been bound up (bandaged or put into a cast to recover)

5. The sheep that were driven away have not be brought back; the lost have not been sought after, found, and returned to the fold

6. With force and cruelty the shepherds ruled the sheep

7. The sheep were scattered, because there was no shepherd, and they became meat for the wild beasts ... when sheep are scattered, they do not have the protection a flock provides, and in their vulnerability, they get separated and singled out more readily, for predatory devouring

8. God's sheep wandered through mountains and over high hills, scattered all over the face of the earth, and no one went looking for them to gather them together again

9. God's flock became prey while the shepherds fed themselves ... in other words, they did not do their shepherding work, the work God had assigned them, rather, they feasted at the expense of the sheep

10. God is against the shepherds

11. God will deliver the flock from these shepherds and they will no longer be able to feed the sheep, or feed from them; God will deliver his flock from the mouths of the shepherds

12. God will search for, seek out, and deliver the sheep, that have been scattered in the cloudy and dark day

Matthew Henry hints at our duty as Christians. Shall I declare what our duty is, dear reader?

We are to believe in the one whom God hath sent. We are to care for, feed, clothe, shelter, orphans and widows. We are to declare Jesus Christ as King, Redeemer of Souls, the Good Shepherd that goes after the lost sheep, no matter how far they have travelled from his side ... These things edify and unite the church, the body of Christ, his bride. 

The covid-church-ruler-cowards, did nothing at all of what God employed them to do, in fact, they did the opposite, which is why I can with full confidence, accuse them of being hirelings, mercenaries, that fatten their wallets and stomachs, at the expense of the flock. 

For shame. 

If your church, your pastor and the staff or volunteers, followed covid protocols, they did you wrong, dear reader. My hope is that you do not trust sinners disguised as saints. If they fed you to the waiting wolves during covid, they will leave you as prey once more, when their own skin is threatened. Cowards run and hide, and must not be trusted as rulers or leaders.  

Yellow is a natural shade of yuck for weaklings.

Let Go

A family outing had us driving through the African Lion Safari, where tropical creatures roamed freely.  Animals stuck their heads into open car windows looking for a quick snack fix, and they weren't exactly shy or polite in their efforts. Fascinated, I watched a mother monkey grazing while holding tightly, the tail of her bouncing baby. The baby wanted to go here, then there, and the mother knew that restraint was in order, to keep the toddler safe: it didn't know about danger yet, the babe required an older, wiser, parental monkey, to guard and protect it from predators, and from its own wild self. 

Do you have a baby in your life, dear reader? This morning I see myself figuratively letting go of the back of a shirt I have held onto. I see the futility of my efforts to save, to secure, to guard and protect, someone that is out of my reach. Let go, let go. I hear these words in my head but my heart says, Must I? How can I? What will happen to them if I do, let go? Do I really have to? 

She is not yours. She is mine. 

God is mercy, God is grace. God is pure love, and he loves in ways unfathomable. Sometimes I think I am the only one that feels his love, because he is all mine all day long. Therein is the pleasure and the pain: It is excruciating knowing him this way, and also knowing, that someone, many someones, that we know and love, do not know him as we do. I grab a fistful of shirt in my mind, and try to steer and direct my baby, or pull her to me to hold her close: Stay with me, stay with me, I want to plead, We will go in together. 

In where? you ask. Why the throne room of course, I reply. Do you know of it? Have you heard of the King? He has a sceptre and he has extended it to you to touch its tip. He is seated at the right hand of the Father, and he bids you, Come near. 

I don't want to pull at the back of shirts. I don't want to drag the unwilling where they do not want to go. I want to extend my hand, have fingers interlace, and delight in the pleasure of walking side-by-side with my kindred, to pay homage to the Sovereign of souls. 

Today I was reminded of the word prescience, defined as:

Foreknowledge of events, divine omniscience, human anticipation of the course of events: FORESIGHT

The word prescient perfectly applies to God. In his generosity, he bestows abilities to his children, that feel like offshoots of prescience; they take the invisible form of discernment, insight, anticipation, foresight, or a knowing that feels like deja vu. We know, for instance, and have been taught via scripture, to trust in his Word and by virtue of trusting in The Word, we feel the despair of not knowing, whether someone we love will be with us in heaven, when death crosses the thresholds of our different doors. We have an understanding or foreknowledge of events, since we have been divinely instructed, and we anticipate the course that God has revealed will be taken, and with this knowledge, we despair, or at least, I do, I have. 

While the world spins round and round, I fear some will be tossed off, shot into space, never to be seen again. While my faith roots me to the God of the universe, many a lost soul looks to the universe for signs and wonders, to confirm their magical thinking. I WANT ... I want ... I want ... to have everyone I love, to love Jesus. Is that too much to ask?

I asked God this morning if my tears matter, if my pleading changes anything. In other words, Can I cry someone into heaven? Will my begging make a difference? His response now, is the same as the one I heard this morning, Let go of the back of that shirt. She is not yours. She is mine. 

It feels as though he might have to pry my fingers, one by one, off of that shirt I have bunched up in my desperation. He loves her and knows her far better than I ever will, and he is her Father. I must remember this always, as I attempt one more time, to let go. 

The Bible says we must pray, and God never gives instructions in vain. There is reason in his directives, so I will pray without ceasing; I will hope without tiring; I will petition without being petulant. I will pray and pray some more. 

As a side note, dear reader, isn't it kind of insanely funny, how idiotic men tried to take God out of science? Look here:

God is DIVINE PREscience

God is OMNIscience

He is the first, the last, and the all in all. No one can take God out of the equation, without putting themselves in peril. 

Revelation 1:8

I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the ending, saith the Lord, which is, and which was, and which is to come, the Almighty.

Transference

One way or another, the Devil works his magic, manipulating minds in an attempt to have them work harder than is necessary, to solve already resolved issues, turning topics into riddles, where plain language has been clearly spoken.  

In the book of Acts, Pharisees that believed in Jesus but really savoured their religion. and the pride of being known as God's peculiar people, were unwilling to give up their status; as a result, they deviously worked at yoking fledgling Gentile converts to Christianity, by suggesting that in order to be saved, they must first be circumcised and secondly, follow the laws of Moses. Why, pray tell, would someone, anyone, saved by the grace of God, with the Holy Ghost dwelling within, have to jump through human hoops, that God Almighty had already removed? 

Consider a little game I would like you to play. Here are the rules you must follow in order to succeed, based on my standards. 

1. I hand you a map. I stand at home base, the return spot that you must come to after following instructions on the back of the map. Go now, following each set of numbered instructions, without looking at the next. 

2. On my map, look for point A, then travel over the hills and into the woods, to a treasure box located at point B. Once you have opened the box and retrieved what is inside, you may return to me at home base, and I will check your progress. If you have that certain something found in the treasure box, I will give you a yes nod. If I look you straight in the eye, without uttering a word, you are required to return to point B, once there, look more deeply into the treasure box. Upon your return, if you indeed, have found that certain something, I will give you the nod, and you may proceed. *You may have to repeat this process several times. 

3. Return directly to point B, and travel next to point C. At point C, you will climb a tree and pull down a kite with words written on it. Return to me at home base with the kite. Refrain from reading the kite until you stand before me. Next, you must read what is written on the kite, and give me your interpretation; I will determine if what you say, is accurate and approval worthy. Do not fret, I can help you with the words and give you my expert guidance; but, it may just be that you are not ready to understand what I tell you, in which case, you can sit before me, for some time, until such time, as I deem you ready to speak as I speak, and understand as I deem it necessary, for you to travel to point D. 

Dear reader, the Devil knows what The Bible states, Galatians 3:1-29

O foolish Galatians, who hath bewitched you, that ye should not obey the truth, before whose eyes Jesus Christ hath been evidently set forth, crucified among you? This only would I learn of you, Received ye the Spirit by the works of the law, or by hearing of faith? 

Are ye so foolish? having begun in the Spirit, are ye now made perfect by the flesh? Have ye suffered so many things in vain? if it be yet in vain.

He therefore that ministereth to you the Spirit, and worketh miracles among you, doeth he it by the works of the law, or by the hearing of faith? Even as Abraham believed God, and it was accounted to him for righteousness. Know ye therefore that they which are of faith, the same are the children of Abraham. And the scripture, forseeeing that God would justify the heathen through faith, preached before the gospel unto Abraham, saying, In thee shall all nations be blessed. So then they which be of faith are blessed with faithful Abraham. 

For as many as are of the works of the law are under the curse: for it is written, Cursed is every one that continueth not in all things which are written in the book of the law to do them. But that no man is justified by the law in the sight of God, it is evident: for, The just shall live by faith. And the law is not of faith: but, The man that doeth them shall live in them. Christ hath redeemed us from the curse of the law, being made a curse for us: for it is written, Cursed is every one that hangeth on a tree: That the blessing of Abraham might come on the Gentiles through Jesus Christ; that we might receive the promise of the Spirit through faith.

Brethren, I speak after the manner of men; Though it be but a man's covenant, yet if it be confirmed, no man disannulleth, or addeth thereto. Now to Abraham and his seed were the promises made. He saith not, And to seeds, as of many; but as of one, And to thy see, which is Christ. And this I say, that the covenant, that was confirmed before of God in Christ, the law, which was four hundred and thirty years after, cannot disannul, that I should make the promise of none effect. For if the inheritance be of the law, it is no more of promise: but God gave it to Abraham by promise. Wherefore then serveth the law? It was added because of transgressions, till the seed should come to whom the promise was made; and it was ordained by angels in the hand of a mediator.

Now a mediator is not a mediator of one, but God is one. Is the law then against the promises of God? God forbid: for if there had been a law given which could have given life, verily righteousness should have been by the law. But the scripture hath concluded all under sin, that the promise by faith of Jesus Christ might be given to them that believe. 

But before faith came, we were kept under the law, shut up unto the faith which should afterwards be revealed. Wherefore the law was our schoolmaster to bring us unto Christ, that we might be justified by faith. But after that faith is come, we are no longer under a schoolmaster. For ye are all the children of God by faith in Christ Jesus. For as many of you as have been baptized into Christ have put on Christ. There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus. 

And if ye be Christ's, then are ye Abrahams's seed, and heirs according to the promise. 

Since circumcision is no longer a marker setting the Jewish people apart from the Gentiles, and since Christians belong to Christ via saving grace faith provided by the Holy Ghost, Satan has had to come up with ways to re-enslave, by instituting rules, laws, human regulations, instigated by demonic forces, to impede progress: this, is sinful transference. When pastors prevent converts from being baptized by having them play by rules they have written in invisible ink, they are indicating that there is a private club that prohibits entrance, unless of course, an entrance fee is paid; unless of course, wannabe Christians step to the left, hop to the right, raise and wave left arm, shake and swirl right wrist. The self-appointed gate-keepers have added to scripture to their peril, when they stand in the way of someone that wants to profess their faith, in private - just as the Ethiopian eunuch was baptized by Philip after they had this exchange, found in Acts 8:37: And Philip said, If thou believest with all thine heart, thou mayest (be baptized), And he answered and said, I believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God - or publicly with other believers as celebratory witnesses. If a person wants to be baptized, because they profess faith in Christ as Saviour, they must be considered saved, regardless of their age: God speaks for and through them, when they express interest in the next step of their walk of faith, evidenced by their desire to be baptized.

Transference, in psychological terms, is defined thusly: 

The redirection to a substitute, usually a therapist, of emotions that were originally felt in childhood

I am purposefully suggesting to you, that weak and wilful humans want to redirect spiritual attention away from God, swapping out what is good and true and right, for a cheap substitute. Childlike faith is astoundingly pure, innocent, pristine: to throw a yoke upon the young, drops a heavy millstone upon the one that imposes manmade stratum to trip them up. 

We must question pastors that refuse to baptize children. They err, and must repent, for regulating what God has instituted as a right of passage for the faithful. We must always lead people to the throne room and trust that God will take most excellent care of them, while we encourage and edify. We must never, ever, be stumbling blocks to the new convert: we must never, ever, have them look to mere men for a nod, and for gold star approval based on manmade game play rules, to enter into the kingdom of God. 

God forbid we keep people out from where he wants them to go, and in their childlike faith, excitedly approach.

Peace Thief

There are some beings among us that masquerade as humans. They have human form, they walk and talk like humans, and yet, they are subhuman, bearing the image of man whilst embodying the spirits of demons. Have you had the eyes of evil gaze in your direction, dear reader? Have you experienced a chill in your soul when in the company of certain people? What about the slit eyes of a snake peering at you through a person you are well acquainted with, someone you would rather avoid and evade, because they give you the creeps? 

A person must decide to give themselves over to evil in order to house the devils of hell, while residing in this earthly plane. A person must choose to give themselves over to the dark side, to deal treacherously with other human beings. Generationally, I suggest to you, that demons travel along family lines, meaning they can be the hideous legacy passed from one generation to the next, just like the vileness of alcoholism and abuse, are pass-downs from grandparents to parents to children. Demons destroy individuals when they are given carte blanche in the mind, in the heart, in the very soul of a human they work with and through: ultimately, whole families can be and often are, devastated with the raunchiness of wickedness ruling and reigning in their midst. The Good News, is that whole families can be saved from this type of wretchedness, once they are purged of the demanding, frothing at the mouth foulness of angels fallen. Jesus came to set the captives free, to cleanse them of their uncleanness; this is the Good News - Salvation is available, no matter your upbringing, or down-bringing, as the case may be.  

Dear reader, there are those among us that insinuate themselves, entering in where they are not invited. They are peace thieves; it delights them to no end to cause trouble, disturb the joyful, infect the cheery, with glib and grim insults, casting aspersions on their prey with the intention of maiming to fatally wound. If they can't get their hands around a throat to strangle, they will go about their killing business another way. There is no end to the scheming for the demonically inclined, and this type of relentlessness is rewarded, if and when, the victim of their onslaughts, shows signs of weakness via reaction, or any other indication of injury.  

It is pearls to swine to give maniacal maniacs any attention at all, other than to turn the back to them, brush the dust off, and walk away. Dust to dust dear reader: when dealing with a human that acts like the devil, they are a dead thing, and you do not have to give them any of the life force that moves in you and gives you your being. The demonically motivated cannot stand being ignored, and they will, and do, find ways to engage those they hate. I will give you a little tip about people that have demons residing within: they hate a lot and often, and while you may feel singularly selected, and you may very well be their pet project person to antagonize, they have many similar interests, and wreak havoc wherever they go. It isn't personal, meaning you aren't the only one they target: these pseudo people get their kicks from kicking anyone and everyone that opposes them, that they cannot control or coral, and they delight in the discomfort and discomfiture they instigate. 

So, this brings us to the strategy you may want to employ when gorilla attacked or sucker punched. Highlighted is what you already know from past experienced, followed by what you can do to combat your assailant, to secure your peace: 

1. The demonic enjoy sneak attacks and throwing their prey off guard

Refrain from rushing in to defend your honour. The assailant wants you to react and knows that if his insults and insinuations have hit the mark, you will become incensed and perhaps even enraged. He/She loves rage, especially yours. The predator will take credit gleefully when the arrow they shot hits the target of your mind, heart, or spirit

2. The demonic live to lie

You know this person is a liar, and attempts to twist truth to accommodate their own bent out of shape personality and character. Know too, that no matter what you say or do, all will be used against you in their sick court of corrupted law. You cannot win when wrestling with a rattle snake. Their words are venomous and when they strike, it is solely for the purpose of infecting you with poison. If you don't trust them, then you already know not to trust a word of what they snakily speak. 

Do not fall for their lies when they say horrible things about you. Do not believe or take to heart their disgusting suggestions: stand firm, as though the darts they toss, have fallen to the floor without ever getting near the board. Finally, say very little if anything in response. If you must respond, be curt, minus any hint of emotion. 

3. The demonic are relentless

These strange villains appear to be tireless and limitless too, in their subtle and clever warfare. They are sneaky, and it is alarming that they seem to be almost genius in their craftiness, in their ability to come up with plans of mental, emotional, and spiritual, torture. How, you ask yourself, could they possibly come up with yet another plot and plan to snake their way into my life and once more, thieve away my peace?

You must be prepared. You need not be waiting and anticipating their sneak attack, it will come. Rather, enjoy yourself and your life, and when this person that loves to hate you contacts you, just know that they have mischief in mind. Buy yourself time, dear reader. Do not dance when they shoot bullets at your feet. Treat them like you would spam, or a door to door solicitor that you want to avoid. Give yourself rules to follow that create boundaries that prevent their entry: when you do see the interloper on your property, meaning they have entered into your thoughts and irritated your mind, stealing your peace, sort out what their intentions are so that you understand what they want to accomplish via the sneak attack.

Revenge is a motivator for people that have been thwarted in their attempts to dominate others. Giving them what they want by letting them know you are upset, encourages them greatly, to continue to chip away at your peace. This predator wants you to be on edge, to be anxious, to think of nothing other than what they have attempted to plant in your mind. They are sowers of discord and it serves you well, to understand this without any wavering: we all bear fruit, and the predators fruit is inedibly rotten, sickening the stomach. Nothing they have to offer you or suggest to you is for your well-being. It behooves you to acknowledge this and stand firm. Unless this person dies to their flesh by being born again in Christ Jesus, they will continue to corrupt their own spirit, and work tirelessly to corrupt yours too. Know that your peace in this world comes from your relationship with Christ, and that no matter what anyone says to you, Truth is your vindicator. 

I end with the wisdom of scripture as your encouragement: 

Psalm 4:8

I will both lay me down in peace, and sleep: for thou, LORD, only makest me dwell in safety

Proverb 12:20

Deceit is in the heart of them that imagine evil: but to the counsellors of peace is joy

Betrayal Trauma & Bullet Biters

The biggest shock to the human heart is betrayal. The trauma it causes might send one to a secret place in the mind that says, We will decide to look away; pretend we did not see that, hear that, feel that, that thing that hurts in such a horrendous way. It might kill us if we acknowledge it, so we will not.  

Betrayal is a form of killing that causes slow and painful death, of trust, of caring, of intimate sharing, and ultimately, of relationship. But what of the killer, and what of the killed? The betrayer and the betrayed?

I heard the words betrayal trauma, and like the code being correctly clicked into place to open a safe, I finally understood some of the clients I have worked with over the years; clients that had cold hard facts, evidence they spoke, and proof that they proffered in sessions, that should have had them heading for the hills away from people that had corrosive control over their souls, but alas, they could not, would not, extricate themselves from their vicious and sometimes violent oppressors. How come? Why, given all they had experienced, and shared in sessions, were they so reluctant to disengage from their abuser? 

It's a trick, a sleight of hand in the mind, dear reader. We are the biggest liars when we see what we want to see in another, despite all evidence pointing to the contrary. We lie to ourselves, and with magical thinking, we believe we can somehow sweeten up the sour pusses, soften the emotionally hardened, and kind our way into a self-absorbed soul, to manipulate them into returning the favour. Sure, we may have been misled, but it doesn't take much encouragement for us to mislead ourselves. Are you blaming the victim? is your question. Yes, perhaps I am on some level ... it is with the hindsight afforded the seniors among us, and that includes me, that I can say, I have done my fair share of hoping against hope with people that displayed unsavoury character flaws that I accommodated, because I wanted to see past the obvious and into their depths, into what lay beyond ... I have discovered, sometimes there just isn't anything to see, because there is no depth to dive into! 

My most successful clients are bullet biters. They are the stuff of which great humans are made. Honest clients want not only to hear the truth, they want to live it. This means that the sleight of hand is stopped dead in its swiping tracks; the trick of mental manipulation is called out: they start to see with eyes that do not want the shield of rosy colouring. They see, and hear, in black, and in white. From the *scary safety of honest to goodness truth telling, a path is cut; a trajectory begins to draw them out of the circumstances and situations, that formerly had them dancing to the beat of their betrayer. I wager it is self-betrayal that is the most painful to face, when we have compromised who we are and what we want, by going along with the idea that we can change another to suit our own dreamy desires. The bullet biters face the facts when they see how they have contributed to their own downfall. The brave hearted will look at the trauma they have caused themselves by betraying their own soul, and they will want to rectify the situation, course correct, and live a pristine sort of life, based on what they value the most: Truth. 

Betrayal is a brutality that takes time to recover from, but the recovery cannot begin until the injured person acknowledges that betrayal has occurred. Jesus died on a cross, betrayed by humanity through our sin. It feels great to point a finger or wave a hand in the direction of people that have hurt us and betrayed our trust, but when we recognize we have done the very same things to each other, and to the Creator, that asks only for our devotion, in return for his forever faithfulness, we recognize we have some forgiving to do and some forgiving to ask for too. This does not mean we continue to subject ourselves to the trauma of ongoing betrayal, it means we hold ourselves and others accountable, even to the point of removing them from our lives, if they are not willing to change, and we are no longer willing to accept them as they are. 

There are many people that have been victimized by psychopathic narcissists. Upon listening to the stories of women defending the men that had very nearly murdered them, I learned that because of the trauma this type of betrayal caused, they could not see the men as they were, wicked perpetrators and killers. To be clear, we do not consciously begin relationship with people we suspect might eventually want to strangle us to death; that is a ludicrous idea. Evil is insideous, and sometimes shows itself as filled with light, wooing and winning victims, telling them what they want to hear in order to captivate. It is when evil begins to show its ugly face, that we must start the question process, and ask ourselves: 

• Is what I see now, the real person? 
• Is the one I thought I knew a fraud, a pretender, a predator revealed? 
• What do I observe, that has me wondering what has changed, and why?

Other questions can be asked, but that is not the point. The point is, the questioning has begun, and that is what starts the mental ball rolling in the right direction.

Dear reader, if you feel uneasy most of the time, and especially when you think of a person that is dominate or domineering in your every day, I suggest to you that this person is a menace to your mental well-being. If you feel threatened or beaten down, perhaps you can start to believe those tell-tale symptoms of trauma are mistreatment induced, and start talking about it to someone you trust. No matter how shaky you may feel about what is happening, it is soul shattering to not do a thing to help yourself. You do not have to sacrifice your entire life in order to preserve a faulty belief system that does not serve you. You must not lie to yourself about what is happening in order to avoid the pain that awaits you on the other side of truth telling. Speaking honestly will not kill you: conversely, hiding the truth from yourself is like slow suicide. Once you face the facts without whitewash, you will indeed suffer, and recover too! Time does heal the wounds of betrayal when we are willing to come clean, and accept Truth as our winsome healer. 

*Scary safety: it is frightening to face facts, but freeing at the very same time. It is not easy to begin the process of change, but those that want to live free from mental manipulation, their own and that of others imposed upon them, will do the work required to stay the course, despite the challenges and painful reconciling that is encountered, and engaged with, along the way. 

A note to bullet biters

When a wound is dug into to remove what festers there and causes infection; when it is cleaned out and the sting of alcohol burns to purify, healing begins. We need only ensure nothing harmful enters what has been made well. 

Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life (Proverbs 4:23)

And herein do I exercise myself, to have always a conscience void of offence toward God, and toward men (Acts 24:16)

The integrity of the upright shall guide them: but the perverseness of transgressors shall destroy them (Proverbs 11:3)

One Year

Once again I wonder, Is my imagination playing tricks on me? When someone dies, the brain still plays memories and fortunately, unfortunately, so do our phones. Images of my sister, videos of her, come up on anniversary dates. Today, one year ago today, she became what is commonly called, the dearly departed. My ignoramus of a phone does not have images or videos from a year ago today, and for this reprieve, I am grateful. 

Stupid, amazing, stupid memory, cursed when we recall, blessed when we recall; a loss when we cannot have once again what is somehow awkwardly missing. I want to remember everything but do not want to draw too near, because then the sense of misplacement of my sister hits like a wet fish across the face. Remember? She is no more. How is she no more? Wherefore art thou, dear sister? 

I almost went shopping these past couple of days. I almost went to a store she and I frequented when we would go off to find hanging on racks treasures. I wanted to go to stores where the staff knew her voice, her laugh, recognized her face, knew her by name, and tell them, She died. Ask them, Did you know she died? Have you noticed her missing, that she hasn't been around? Have you missed her? Do you wonder where she went? I wanted them to know, so they could be sad and shocked in front of me. I selfishly wanted to be sad and shocked in front of them. 

Sad and shocked are not states of preferred being. Sad and shocked are avoidable, when we pretend they are not there, and we go about the business of living. We must go about the business of living, isn't that right, dear reader? No matter how sad, shocked, sorrowful, sullen, sickly the soul, we must carry on as though nothing really hurts that badly, or as though life is life, death is death, and we must be brave and acknowledge they are inseparable Siamese twins, co-existing without a sharp enough scalpel to part them. The person is dead; Get on with it, the mind says ... but the heart, the heart aches and longs and wishes and wants, and it is the heart that feels broken and bleeding, cut to the quick. How vulgar it is to speak death, to see lifelessness: it is an affront to the senses and a cruel trick. 

I have images I could share, and I am confident you have some too, of people you miss. In my family, a candle is lit on death anniversaries, and the flame burns throughout the day. Each time I enter the kitchen this July 8th, I will see a reminder that my sister really existed, really lived and breathed, laughed until she almost peed ... that she was a part of my like, in countless ways; there was only one of her ever made, and then God broke the mould. Ha ha ... in Antonella's case, no one would disagree with this assessment - she was truly unique. Just typing her name brings on a torrent of tears, and rightly so. 

I am grateful for the written word, for a keyboard that is responsive to my finger taps. I hadn't cried for quite some time, I realize, because I push away the harsh reality of her death, and subsequent almost impossible to believe, removal from our lives. How did this happen ... here today, gone tomorrow ... here for just shy of sixty years, gone for an entire year. What?

I was smart with myself this time. This time I took time. This time I realized that grief requires space to be given room to be aired. People die and the left behind wonder and long, and the brain plays a role in suggesting they never existed because, Life has gone on, see, without them. You, the brain says, are still here, even though they are not. You are fine, why borrow sorrow trouble?

Because Brain ... I love her and wish I had more time with her and so I will, I will weep and miss and want, even though I cannot have. 

I will. 

She is and was and always will be, worth it.